I dont really tell anyone how i feel. so no one really knows.... okay well this one boy does. i told him everything we were just friends though. then we kinda stop talking afterward. so im kinda scared to tell anyone how i feel because im scared they will leave. i have recently tried to starve myself. it didnt really work cuz all i think about is food. im not really fat. im pretty normal... just part of me thinks i am. i have thought about depression. i have even looked it up on the computer after i posted this. i kinda fit in. i really do wanna feel better about myself. i just dont wanna go to the doctor because im scared that my mom or dad will think that its there fault im like this. there not. My bestfriend Mikah had to take depression pills last year so i know i can tell her anything. i just dont. i cant seem to get it out.

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Ahhhhhhh. . . .