I know how hard it can be. I'm sorry about everything that you've been through. No one deserves to go through that kind of hell.
There is nothing anyone can really say to fix you, because your mindset will be your mindset until you find a way to ease the pain.
Suicide is not the answer. There are so many things in this world to live for, although I know right now it might not seem like it at all.
You lost your brothers a very short time ago. I think you need to allow yourself time to mourn before you try and start building up your life again.

There are lots of people here who will talk to you about this gladly, myself being one of them. Feel free to email me (queenofsmoothness at gmail.com) or IM me (Frazzledwarf) on AIM if you have it.