Last year I was REALLY suicidal ... I thought I wasn't good enough for anybody I even tried an overdose of sleeping pills ... but luckely it didn't work ... it just made me sick.

Lately I've been better, but sometimes [... strangely enough, normaly in the nights] I feel VERY suicidal and wanna cut myself ... I've cut myself about 2 times in my life ... coz I kept having arguments with my bf [... well ex ex boyfriend now] I have quite good self control ... luckely, so I can stop myself from cutting myself ... if I didnt have very good self control my wrists would be covered in scars by now.

These depresing phases I go through only last about a day ... which is kinda good I guess ... coz then the next day I'm normaly fine.

But I don't understand why they happen ... it happens just all of a suddon ... I start crying for no reason and wanna die or cut myself.

Lately I've been feeling like this mostly because my ex bf broke up with me just last month and I keep feeling that I'm not good enough for anybody and every relationship I'll have I'll end up fucking up at one point so what's the point in trying?

But the next day I can be REALLY happy and hyper and don't care about anything and just wanna have fun =/ It's just so strange.

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