Hey guys. My name is Cody.. I wanted to just tell you guys where I kind of came from..
None of you might even care..
but for those of you out there struggling... or don't think you can succeed.. Oh boy you can..
I started off really young.. Everyone liked me! I was such a good guy!!! I was sooo shy though!! I hardly ever talked!! EVeryone in kindergarten loved me! I was kinda like the spotlight for everyone! This was all the same until 3rd grade....
ONe day we were all sitting on the floor reading a book. We all got up to go somewhere. I felt this.. really weird feeling... I ended up not getting up.
I was scared out of my mind. I had my first panic attack... I was crying in front of everyone. Just a little bit though... and I thought I was going to die. I was diagnosed with General anxiety dissorder, and social anxiety dissorder. I went to the hospital before we knew I had it because I would always have an upset stomach. The tested me for many things. One test was not so fun. I got a tube shoved up my nose down into my throat and into my stomach for a whole day. They thought it was acid reflex. 2 years later after trying to find out why I could go to stadiums without getting an upset stomach or feeling like my throat was going to close... we found out.
I got on these meds... they were pretty good actually! they only lasted until the beggining of middle school. Everyone turned to different roads.. Most ended up doing drugs, and the other people left me for other friends. So I turned out to be a loner... I would often go home and cry I was so lonely. I had nobody. THe teachers loved me though. I was pretty much the only one who didn't show off or be a complete A$$ in class
I hated school though... Never did my homework... Hated it...
Then came high school... Sophmore year came... This changed my life.
I ended up passing out 7 times in 3 weeks all in different areas. People would make fun of me for it and make up stories about why I passed out when they had no clue. Some said I took drugs... some said I drank to much. It really hurt me... A few weeks after this I became suicidal. To make matters even worse... there was this kid who always made fun of me. And I had access to fire arms... I planned out a few weeks later I was going to go to school and kill him. but... I couldn't thats not me. I am probably one of the nicest kids you will ever meet.
After this i started cutting myself... I was so lost. I didnt know who I was anymore. I had changed. I never thought I would get a gf.. nothing. My anxiety got so bad I went to childrens hospital for 7 months straight without seeing my family. I remember them dragging me to thew room with the rest of the kids and I was screaming for my mom to help me. I saw her crying and heard her so "HANG IN THERE BUDDY!!!" those 7 months I didnt make one friend. When I got home... we all celebrated. I missed my family so much!
I could never go to hockey games.. large stadiums... plays... arenas...
nothing... I stayed in my house.. On the computer.. 24/7. and skipped school. I missed 2 years of school.
After 8 months of doctors helping me I am finally straightened out.
I am 17 years old and am already a fire fighter/EMT. I go to school 4 hours a day... and get my high school deploma in 2 months.
I have had 3 girlfriends... all of which didnt last to long because I was reallllllllly shy
and now.. I have the best girlfriend in the whole freaking world. She helps me everyday. She is my miracle.
I can now go to hockey games.. large crouds... all of that no problem... I dont self harm anymore.. Nothing. I dont even see doctors anymore. I go on here... talk to people on the computer and the rest of my time? I do fire fighting. I have no friends that are my age. They are all adults that are my friends. Maybe because I am more mature than most of the kids my age right now? My best friend is a cop. He has helped me through so much...
Just thinking off all of what I have been through makes me tear up. I have seen so much... especially doing fire stuff. I have seen dead bodies... I have worked on people that have had the heart stop working... I have seen loads of blood... I thought I would never be able to do something like that.
But its what I like doing.
Helping people out.
Thats what I am about ladies and gentleman.
if you guys ever need ANYTHING. Give me a hollla!!!
You all seem really cool and for the first time I havnt been flamed on a forum and I can ask a question without being embaressed. You guys rock.
I used to be a rapper and a stand up comedian all but 3 months ago
. I hope this story can change someone out there who is struggling. because with the right help... you can make it. and you can do anything you want in life. I PROMISE.
My Story. 
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