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Old 01-25-2013, 11:20 AM   #1
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Monastery Molly - Poem I Wrote

I was going through my iPod earlier and stumbled upon an old poem I wrote in December. I kinda liked it so I thought I would share it on the site :P. It originally started off as a song idea I came up with after thinking about how people in my town would treat a person for wearing religious robes to school and I never got to finish the song so I ended up adapting what I had already written into a poem of sorts.

Monastery Molly:

Strange faces are gazing at the robed Buddhist meditating in the courtyard
Bickering and snickering,
insults blistering,
sacred gowns subject to immoral littering.
Tears are bled onto the robes of Molly's grandfather,
wounds stinging from those lost souls fodder.
Unrelenting is their onslaught and unrelenting is her forgiveness,
She knows not what is their personal business.

What do you think of it? Should I add to it?
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Old 01-25-2013, 11:51 PM   #2
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Re: Monastery Molly - Poem I Wrote

sounds pretty good
you should continue it
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Old 01-26-2013, 06:37 PM   #3
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Re: Monastery Molly - Poem I Wrote

i can relate to your poem. we have a huge muslim community in our country and some people would treat them differently/negatively. main reason is because of the way they dress. your poem is so simple yet it tells so much on society's cultural differences and how the victims would feel about it. it's sad, but your writing is good.

why didnt you finish it? i think it would make a good song.
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Old 01-27-2013, 02:07 AM   #4
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Re: Monastery Molly - Poem I Wrote

I might finish it sometime :P Thanks for the feedback.
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Old 01-27-2013, 04:04 AM   #5
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Re: Monastery Molly - Poem I Wrote

Love it.
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