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Old 08-20-2010, 04:56 PM   #1
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Unhappy venting/advice?

so, i know this guy in texas, and i live in virginia, and he pretty much believes we'll never meet, but we are SO close, its crazy. its like we are dating but we arent, he calls me baby i call him babe, we fall asleep together, and anywho now we are sorrta drifting away, and i'm having a real hard time dealing with it because i got so attached and it seriously is one of the worst feelings i've had knowing that we arent as close anymore. we still talk all the time, basically from the time we both wake up until the time we both fall asleep but its so easy to tell things have changed, hes noticed and i've noticed, but we still do nothing about it.
one night we were on the phone, and we were talking about this, well something similar and i was saying how i'm hurting, and he told me i need to do whatever makes natalie happy, and i think maybe that would be to just stop talking to him in general. cut off all ties to him. but then that also will make me miserable!
i love him, a lott a lot a lot. he gets me i get him, hes sweet, hes overall my perfect guy, but anymore it just seems harder and harder talking to him.

is this natural to happen with long distance relationships that arent exactly relationships?
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Old 08-20-2010, 05:09 PM   #2
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Re: venting/advice?

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Originally Posted by namemenatalie View Post
so, i know this guy in texas, and i live in virginia, and he pretty much believes we'll never meet, but we are SO close, its crazy. its like we are dating but we arent, he calls me baby i call him babe, we fall asleep together, and anywho now we are sorrta drifting away, and i'm having a real hard time dealing with it because i got so attached and it seriously is one of the worst feelings i've had knowing that we arent as close anymore. we still talk all the time, basically from the time we both wake up until the time we both fall asleep but its so easy to tell things have changed, hes noticed and i've noticed, but we still do nothing about it.
one night we were on the phone, and we were talking about this, well something similar and i was saying how i'm hurting, and he told me i need to do whatever makes natalie happy, and i think maybe that would be to just stop talking to him in general. cut off all ties to him. but then that also will make me miserable!
i love him, a lott a lot a lot. he gets me i get him, hes sweet, hes overall my perfect guy, but anymore it just seems harder and harder talking to him.

is this natural to happen with long distance relationships that arent exactly relationships?
I was sadly, in this exact same situation. I am in Virginia too, the girl was in California. It was true love, despite what anyone says.
I don't know why, but I started to be stupid. I said a few stupid things, and we drifted a bit apart. I loved her, very much. Hehe, we both had plans that when we were 17 and 18 we'd drive up and meet in Alaska. We also had so many other plans, like our children, what kind of wedding.. I don't know, I kind of branched off there, I just love thinking about these fond memories. The only time, that I was truly and dearly happy. But, we became drifted a bit. And I lost her.

Learn from my mistake, and just talk. Start conversations, ask how things are and stuff, and fuel that flame of love, before it dies out.

It's an awful feeling losing the one you love, I cried for 2 weeks myself too sleep and I still shed a tear everything single time I think about this girl. I lost her a year ago. Again, just stay active with each other and enjoy what relationship you guys do have, and think on meeting each other, and what's gonna happen with each other. Not "We're never gonna meet" or anything. Enjoy it while you have it.
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Old 08-20-2010, 09:37 PM   #3
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Re: venting/advice?

i was/am in the exact same situation, im going out with a girl who is like 2 continents away, we met when we were both travelling europe and we got together and she came to see me in april and it was amazing but we have been drifting apart because of commitments that we both have, i think that long distance relationships can work out if both people in the relationship put in 100% effort, i would advise meeting up so ye know that your relationship is the same in person as it is on the phone, like maybe a weekend or something together just to see how things go, i know how tough it is when friends/relationships start to drift apart but you have the power to change things, try and talk about why ye are drifting apart, explain hoe both of you feel, and try your best to at least maintain the friendship. best of luck
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Old 08-20-2010, 09:59 PM   #4
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Re: venting/advice?

I feel as if you guys aren't communicating clearly. You both should express how you feel. You haven't mentioned if he had the same feelings for you so I can't give you the best advice for the best of both worlds. What I can tell you is, talk to him, don't hide things, make sure you're clear when you say it. You'll know if he's worth being miserable over if he doesn't want to change to keep the both of you happy.
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Old 08-21-2010, 05:24 AM   #5
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Smile Re: venting/advice?

to journal; awww ]: that made me sad as i read that. i'm sorry you guys didn't work out.

to kopite; it makes me happy to hear that you guys are together even though you are so far away, and i hopes i can take your advice and meet up with him soon, thanks for the luck. (:

to Traveling Star; we dont communicate clearly when it comes to the difficult things, such as this, we both would rather bury our heads in the sand.
but yes he has the same feelings for me, he admitted that he did last January, and for awhile everything was amazing.<3
but now like i said we are drifting away, but so far today we've been talking about some things and i think things might be getting better.
i know that he is a good friend no matter what and i dont wanna lose him as that.
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