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Old 09-17-2008, 07:07 PM   #1
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Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

Been stumbling around on this thread for a little while now, reading and such, and I've finally had the urge to post something. Broke up with my girlfriend of 6 1/2 months, the last month, month and a half were just little fights almost every time we seen each other, and it was just getting old really fast. She said she trusted me but i come to find she is having her best friend talk to my friends on what im doing, doesn't sound to me like she does trust me. She also said she loved me, but im pretty sure she doesn't even know the meaning of the word. It just crappy, because i want to pick the phone up and call her and make everything better, but at the same time i would like to see if she will call me and want me back from some of the things she has said, almost like a test to see if she was just talking or actually meant those things. I dont know what to do, ive talked it over with my friends annd all they say is " heres the bottle, drink up and find a new girl....." , and that isnt how i wanted to play this out, drinking myself stupid. So im comming to all of you on this board, what should i do?
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Old 09-17-2008, 09:33 PM   #2
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

Breaking up with someone after being together for such a long time will be difficult. Of course you are going to be upset.
So wait for a bit see how it goes without you two being a couple.
after abit and you still really want to sort it out and make everything better then talk to her about it and tell her how you feel, if she feels the same, then try and work the relationship out..

After a bit of being single, you might relize that realtionship was never meant to be, good while you had it, but then just didnt work out.

Help this helped a bit.
x
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Old 09-17-2008, 09:39 PM   #3
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

there can be no relationship where there is no trust if she didnt trust you the last time you were with her there is no point in bein with her.
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Old 09-17-2008, 10:10 PM   #4
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

She may trust you, you know.
Sometimes insecurity or being afraid can make us come across like we don't. For example in one of my previous relationships i came across that i didn trust my ex because i may have been afraid he wouldnt have kept to his word or might have generally been afraid he may have lied or something. This usually happens when you've been let down by others, maybe she has, i dont know. But if she sounds a genuine person (which you would only know) then that would say a lot. You only know what she is like so only go with how you feel, what you feel is right overall of what has happened. It often helps to sit and give that person a chance to explain why they might be coming across like they dont trust you, or why they're acting like they dont. You werent really together for a long time so she may need a bit more time to give 100% trust and this may not be personal to you. Like i said i do it myself sometimes, i never not trusted my ex's but i didnt know how to give them full trust because i was probbaly afraid of losing them. Some people are wary until they fully know someone. It wouldnt be wrong to call her and give her a last chance to explain why she does that though.
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Old 09-17-2008, 10:10 PM   #5
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

Yeh i gotta agree with Kirwan464. If she didnt trust you then theres little point in being in a relationship with her. Trust is the base of a good relationship, and if you dont have that then you dont really have alot. I think you should ask yourself if you want her back or not. Are you better off without her? Was the relationship more trouble then it was worth?
Good luck in whatever you decide to do
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Old 09-17-2008, 10:13 PM   #6
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

well, she wouldnt ever sit down and talk with me about any problems we were having or things we wanted to know about each other, shed always go to her best friend, who is also my friend, and she would talk to me about it and then id talk to the X-gf. its really messed up, im starting to hate making the decision i made =[
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Old 09-17-2008, 10:15 PM   #7
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

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Originally Posted by kirwan464 View Post
there can be no relationship where there is no trust if she didnt trust you the last time you were with her there is no point in bein with her.
But i could be wrong and if your friends told you she was checkin up on you they could have been screwin around with you

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Yeh i gotta agree with Kirwan464. If she didnt trust you then theres little point in being in a relationship with her. Trust is the base of a good relationship, and if you dont have that then you dont really have alot. I think you should ask yourself if you want her back or not. Are you better off without her? Was the relationship more trouble then it was worth?
Good luck in whatever you decide to do
And its scary that people are startin to agree with me
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Old 09-17-2008, 10:27 PM   #8
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

I know she was i asked her about it before we broke up, at first denying it ever happened and then saying it did. Looking back at the relationship i love the girl to death and everything but its almost like she loved the thought of me and not me.
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Old 09-17-2008, 10:34 PM   #9
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

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I know she was i asked her about it before we broke up, at first denying it ever happened and then saying it did. Looking back at the relationship i love the girl to death and everything but its almost like she loved the thought of me and not me.
Well its up to you dude my longest relationship before the one im in now was a week and the one im in now has been over 5 years long.
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Old 09-17-2008, 10:35 PM   #10
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

well its unerstandable for her to go to her best friend, but if she is really that bothered about you she will contact you. It seems you have done the running you need to do, its sometimes best leaving it especially if they're not bothering or showing effort. Afterall if she does love you she would contact you, right?

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Old 09-17-2008, 10:42 PM   #11
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

thats pretty much were im sitting, if she actually loves me as much as she says, shell come back after shes cooled down. or whatever. she knows how i feel, but its sooo damn hard not to call her. Her best freind and I have been talking about this for a while now, and she is starting to think the same as i have/am, that she loves the thought of having a bf and not loving the thought of someone who cares about her and like to see her happy. God damn....
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Old 09-17-2008, 10:46 PM   #12
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

Well she might need a break, but i guess she could tell you.
I know and imagine that actually, i would want to just phone her and tell her how its affecting me and explain my feelings etc, but then another part of you tells you not to.
I hope you both sort this out soon though




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Old 09-17-2008, 10:57 PM   #13
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Re: Broke up with girlfreind, advice?

trust me i would also love to sort all this out and either get back together or have her tell me its over and she doesnt want to be with me, either way stuffs gunna get real.
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