okay if anyone is going to say im "attention seeking" or w.e then please keep the opinions to yourself because right now i dont need to hear it. Thankyou

Recently ive been stressed/depressed whatever you want to call it just not happy with life or myself. I think im ugly, fat, dumb everything to hate about yourself. But the thing is there all true, i am all of them things. I have a boyfriend, and really i should love life i have a boyfriend who cares for me and loves me no matter what i look like but those feelings are still there. I still feel unhappy with myself. Nothing in my life is exciting or fun. I hate school im only in year 9, im not clever atall and ive been seperated from all my friends in all my classes so im alone all day at school. Theres no-one i can really talk to, my boyfriend would listen but he has his own problems, hes tryed killing himself many times but failed he says now he has me his life is perfect, but i know its not, he has problems at home alot of them. I used to cut myself i stopped because i made a promise with my boyfriend that if he stops i stop. Its just getting harder and harder and i want to sort this out before it gets to the point where i want to die.

How can i help myself get happier?
Thanks to anyone who might reply

There are several things I'd like to say to you. Firstly, being "academic" and good at school subjects isn't the be-all and end-all. Though I'm at uni, I'm well aware that many of my friends who left school at 16 will get much better paid jobs than me in the future! Easy for me to say, perhaps, but it's true nevertheless.
You say you're ugly and fat, and I *bet* you that you're not... or at least you're not as ugly and fat as you think you are! Remeber that you are always your harshest critic - other people won't see you the same way as you see yourself. You have a boyfriend, and presumably he's with you because (amongst other things) he finds you attractive. So you're probably not ugly!! If you're feeling fat, then the best thing to do is a bit of exercise, and eat healthily (but DON'T diet). This will also help to raise your mood (I found that exercising helped to stop me feeling like I wanted to self-harm), as well as giving you the knowledge that you are doing something about the things you are self-conscious about.
It is important to talk to someone (believe me, I didn't and I regretted it!!), but I completely understand your feelings of not having anyone to turn to and not wanting to burden other people. Is there a teacher you could talk to, perhaps? I was lucky in that I had a brilliant teacher who would listen to me, but I know it's not that common. Also, would it be so hard to make new friends in your classes so you're not alone. They wouldn't have to replace the friends you already have, but it might stop you from feeling so lonely. And you never know, you might end up getting on really well with them.
The only other thing I can say is that you always have a choice as to how you react to a situation. If something bad happens, there's nothing you can do about it. You can either dwell on it and be sad, or learn from it, put it behind you and be happy. You are the only person who can make that decision. It's all too easy to do the first option and be sad, and it takes a bit of effort to start with to force yourself to be positive, but if you put your mind to it, it does work, and it does help.
Good luck to you x

Thankyou for replying, it has helped me alot tbh.
Im gonna try and start thinking abit more positive about myself. Your right i cant be that ugly if i have a boyfriend? or maybe he just doesnt go for looks. I made some friends in some classes but all my other classes they have there own little friendship groups so im not really welcome, and im not the one to go and start a conversation All i can do is try and hopefully i come out of it alot happier and confident.
Thanks so much for replying, your the first person whos actually given me proper advice and not just "go speak to someone" and i really do apreiciate it
x

Yeah, I know how you feel when you said about not having any freinds in the classes. It's happened to me, but luckily, I know roughly everyone in our year..So making some new freinds wasn't too hard at all.

Even if you can just start up a conversation with the person sitting next to you, it can make life soooo much easier, and you'll enjoy school more.

Hey, no worries
Trust me, I've never met a guy who was in a relationship and who didn't think that their girlfriend was beautiful! So I am truly guessing that you're not ugly!
Just give the positivity a chance - it WILL be difficult and there might be times when you think "what's the point?", but it is possible, and things will get better.
I was never the kind of person to strike up conversations either, but that too gets easier with practice. As DontBother said, why not just chat to the person sitting next to you - maybe about a tv programme or a film, or whatever you might have in common - it'll make the time pass quicker, and maybe you'll make a new friend!
x

Or blatently insult the teacher...Generally what I do.

Ive been feeling the same way... except for about 6 years. I have alot of experience in it and i think i could probably help alot. You sound like you may suffer from anhedonia: a brain disorder caused by over-load of pleasure signals. The symptoms are extreme boredness and hate for everyone around you.


Just know, I have tried countless times to fit in and be justified within a crowd.

and ugly is just something conditioned in your brain.