i need help. I know a guy away from school he's 16 and a few weeks ago he asked to have some of my friends addys (over msn) so i gave some to him.

a bit about this guy- player just a complete player, he's a nice guy and has a really nice personality but the only thing he wants from girls is sex sex sex. Complete charmer and a vain womanizer.

so one of my friends (15) a couple of weeks back came into school and was like nicole i hope you dont mind but im going out with .... , so i was like oh no i don't mind! thats cool etc etc , thing is he lives about 2 hours away from us so was like you going to see him at some point then? like meet up with him and she was giving it all the "yeh probably"

this was a couple of weeks back now and they havn't met and i know for a fact that this guy isn't even interested for a number of reasons 1. he flirts with me 24/7 no infact he flirts with ANY woman 24/7 2. he wanted a pic of her so i sent one and he simply went "ew ugly im ignoring her" 3. he asked if i had a boyfriend so i asked if he had a girlfriend and he said no but hopefully by the end of the weekend he would-meaning he doesnt even consider my friend as a girlfriend (i havn't mentioned the last 2 of these to her, even if i did i doubt she would care)

so anyway today we were talkign about boyfriends and stuff then i said well none of us have boyfriends do we at the moment? and my friend was like yeh i do, so i was like really! who? then she sed this guys name, and i was like ohhh well he's not your boyfriend is he! you've never met him and your not planning to and plus its a fct that 70 percent of converstaion is through eye contact and actually being there.

she knows what he's liek because i've told her that he's probably got a girlfriend already where he lives and he's a major flirter etc but she still says yeh i know that, so why would she want to "date" him!? my opinion on it is because she's never had a boyfriend before so this might all be exciting to her and even though she knows she won't meet him she just wants to see him as a boyfriend because she hasn't had one before and wants one.

it just really annoys me! because i wouldn't consider someone over the internet a boyfriend when your never going to meet them plus i know him (i've actually met him 'cos im the one that knows him) and he's really not interested in her he just wants someone to chat up and she's there.

i've tried talking about it to her like today but she'll just screw up her face and walk away from me then probably bitch about me to other friends

sorry about the long post. Discuss!

1) Whether you consider someone she's never seen in person a real boyfriend or not is irrelevant. This is her life, not yours, so stop expecting her to live by your beliefs and opinions.
2) If she knows what he's like and still refuses to break up with him, then let it be. Whether it annoys you or not is also irrelevant for the same reason as is stated above.
3) Stop trying to impose yourself on her life so much.

~Maggot

that's what i've been doing i've said to her like its non of my buisness and she can do what she wants, it just gets to me evrytime she says he's her boyfriend when clearly he isn't and i always want to say soemthing but then she'll get annoyed with me so i try just to stay out of it but still even when i do that she'll bitch about me because im not taking an interest in her or her love life so i never know what to do saty neutral and ignore it or get involved?

Kudos to you. Thankyou so much for being a caring friend.

I do encourage you to try to get through to her, but you will not do that through excessive preaching or fighting. Tell her what you know, think, believe and that you care, and leave it at that. There's nothing mroe you can do, sadly.

Some people choose to let themselves get used and abused.. only THEY can make the choice to be with someone that will treat them with all the love and kindness they deserve.

Why isn't he?
Okay, let me say this again:

"Whether it annoys you or not is also irrelevant for the same reason as is stated above. ... Stop trying to impose yourself on her life so much."

Is that really not clear enough?

~Maggot

well he's clearly not her boyfriend because he doesn't like her i think he likes the idea of her (being a girl) and he's also interested in soemone near where he lives, he's also said to many of my friends over the internet how he wants to kiss them and stuff its stupid really but he's like that.

i get what your saying and thanks for the advice ! but if i dont take an interest and ask her if he's texted or soemthing she'll have a go at me for not taking an interest but when i do take an interest (im a truthful perosn and won't lie to soemone) ill tell her the truth about what i think and she'll go off in a stress with me

so i can't win?

Doesn't mean he's not her boyfriend. Whether YOU approve of that definition of "boyfriend", that doesn't mean it's the only one. Get off your high horse, 'kay? 'Kay.
Sucks for you, then, eh?

~Maggot

i s'pose right well if she brings it up again ill bite my lip and just not say anything but what about if this guy tells me something else oer the internt? like the other day he told me he got off with like 3 girls so i was like okay good for you, well should i tell her this or just leave the whole thing?

Don't worry about that other poster, okay? You obviously CARE about your friend, and there is NOTHING wrong with that. To care about someone is to wish the best for them, and what you believe and feel is that she does not have the best. You understand that you can't order her not to be with him and good for you. You care, and you can't help but to feel annoyed or worried for your friend that is letting herself be treated this way. That doesn't make you on a high horse, that makes youa good person and a friend that cares. Now you must find the best way to go about getting your idea across without offending or pushign too hard. Sometimes the best way is to simply speak quietly, be patient and wait until you friend is finally willing ot listen.

Your friend knows you dissaprove of the relationship. She is EDGING it on by constantly bugging you about not being interested in her relatinship with him. This is not ONLY yoru problem. This is your friend being childish as well, trying to force and impose her relationship that you disagree with on you. She needs to accept that you dont' approve and stop pushing it.

It's not like the girl doesn't know what's going on and what the guy's like. If that were the case, she wouldn't be on a high horse, but it isn't. The girl knows, yet the OP keeps talking about how much the relationship annoys her and about how he's not her boyfriend and they shouldn't be together. It's not her decision. And it's definitely not her place to try to tell her friend that. *shrugs* Whatever floats your boat and ends in us having to listen to less whining.

~Maggot

sos. if you didn't want to hear my "whining" you shouldn't have come to this thread

Not sure what "sos" means, but I came to this thread to help you. I wasn't aware you'd continue whining, even after I did so.

~Maggot