Hey, im new to all this teen advice stuff but i dont really know who i would atlk to abotu this because im very shy and get embarrised easily.. so here goes.

MY parents have been going through a rough stage, i thought as usual they would get over it, like all the times, but my mum has already kicked my dad out for a few days but let him back home, i wont go into details why but she feals left out because he doesnt spend time with her, and we dont do much as a family. but lately my dad has been doing all this, and also helping alot more with tours like cleaning the house etc. my mum only let him back in the house beause she knew i did. but my dads told me that hes cant go on living like it is now because my mum just thinks of anything possible that she can to make the situation worse, for example, last night my mum asked for some bisciuts, so i went to get them for here, and on the way my dad said "Once shes started she cant stop" - laughing like a joke buy my mom said "ive got to have something intersting in my life" its just little things she says, my dads tried really hard. i understand my mums point of view and my dads, but they dont see ech others. althought there is ALOt mising from that stroy you get the idea.

My dad has decided hes fed up with her treating him liek this and is going to move out, i slighly knew it wasnt going to work but im really confused.
I know my parents have to pay of the house still and its a large chunk of money, and im scared that its gonig to be hard living for a while and just generally dont know what to do apart form trying to help aroudn the house once hes gone etc.

Im fine with the splitting up, im just worred about whats going ot happen with money. i just dont really know..

anyone been in this situion got things that may help or storys to tell would be cool. Cheeers.

aww hey welcome x

try not to worry
your will always parents love you even if they dont love each other and thats all that matters

maybe if they do argue about every little thing they're better apart?

but parents argue all the time but they generally love each other at the end of the day

do u have any siblings you could talk to? if youu dont ill be your soul sista lol
and you can ask me advice

about the money maybe what you could do is find out how much money they earn and put it into a percentage

for example

if your dad earns $60,000 he pays 60% of bills
and if your mum earns $40,000 she pays 40% of bills

bit brainblocked x




mesasge me if you need any help x

luv summer x

My parents are divorced too, but that happened when i was a baby.

I'm sure you have nothing to worry about as your parents love you and will always put you first before themselves.

Sit them down and tell them you're worried so they can re-assure you some more.

xx

__________________

Hey there.

I created my account AGES ago and have only just started posting properly here so I'm not sure how it works either :P

(just a note. I live in Australia and our school system works differently here. There is Primary School which is Kindergarten,1,2,3,4,5,6 and then High School which is 7,8,9,10,11,12)

I know how you're feeling. My parents split up a couple of months ago and it really affected me since they went through a lot before it happened. For the past 4/5 years my parents have been going through a rough patch. I'm in grade 9 now so I transfered from Primary School to High School and then changed High Schools while this was all happening and everything was just so messed up. They had split up previously and my mum had moved out to live in an apartment while my dad took care of me and my older brother. It didn't really affect me as much then because I was young (about grade 5 or 6) and I didn't fully understand the situation. Eventually my parents got back together and my mum moved back in. We moved house and everything was all good again... NOT. My parents started to have massive arguments and screaming fights. I could tell my mum had now got to the point of despising my dad because even when we had people over, she would barely talk to him, sit near him. All the love and affection in their relationship was gone. This was all happening when I was changing from Primary School to High School so it did have an impact on me. I'd sit in the car on my way home from my first day of High School listening to my mother screaming in to the phone at my dad, then muttering to herself the whole way home. We moved house again to a new location where tensions rose and the final blow came. My parents argued so much it got to a point where I was going to yell at them for being idiots. I remember one fight they had over curtains. UH. This was the period I was crying myself to sleep most nights to the sound of them yelling and then my mum crying.
There was the one night where everything fell apart. It was late on a Sunday night and I had just gone to bed around midnight. My mum got home a couple of hours later drunk. My dad had been sleeping on the couch and waiting for her to come home. She came in to the lounge room and bent down to give him a hug. He jolted awake and bashed heads with her. My mum started screaming furiously and crying. I woke up and so did my brother at this point. I heard my mum run up the stars carrying on and slamming the door to the bathroom. My dad was still tired but followed her, apologising profusely. My mum screamed and shouted through the bathroom door. Telling him to stay away. Get out of the house. Carrying on and on. This went on for hours until my dad left and went downstairs. By this point I was tempted to get out of bed but I decided against it and sat still waiting for what would happen next. After some time and listening to my mother sob I heard the bathroom door open. My mother stumbled out and went in to my brothers room crying. Then both of them came in to my room. My mum just kept apologising. I didn't say anything to her. I was shocked. All I knew at that point was that my mum had been hit by my dad. I left the two of them there in my room and went down to see my dad. He was in the kitchen crying. My dad never cries. We stayed there together and sat on the floor as he explained to me what had happened. It was all an accident. I was furious at my mum. She was drunk and stupid. That night I held my dad as he wept...
The next morning my mum had a hangover. I had to go to school with such a heavy burden on my shoulders. I got home that afternoon to find my mum and dad and brother waiting for me. My parents announced they were seperating again, but were going to live together for us.
After I changed High Schools we eventually moved again and bought our very first house. Well my mum did. My dad is in a tight financial situation and has a much low paying job compared to my mum. So he lived in the garage and my mum and brother and I lived in the house. This was in February this year. Over the following months my dad talked to me a lot about the situation. He said he was thinking about moving out. I didn't look at it from my place in the situation, I thought about him. So I told him to move out. Of course I didn't want him to, but I knew he would be so much happier if he did.
So now my dad lives elsewhere and I see him every weekend. I live with my mum because she can support me and pay for my outrageous new school fees. No I didn't really have a choice with who I wanted to live with. But at my age, sometimes when people make decisions for you its just so much easier. I have too much stuff going on in my life to have to worry about my parents problems. its theirs not mine.

So.. haha that was long... I guess I've come to the conclusion that they were just two different people. They did get married when they were young and now they've just developed in to different people. My mum is more work focused and finds "serious" things fun. My dad on the other hand loves a good party and chilling out is his favourite thing to do.

SO. I guess what I'm trying to say is, speak up. I didn't and I'm still depressed about what happened. Call a family meeting. If you don't want to have it just between you and your family, go get help from a counsellor or something who could host a session for you. Or get help from other family members. Relatives can help greatly because they know your parents well.

The financial thing is nothing you have to worry about okay? It's your parents thing to sort out. You have to realise that your parents still love you and always love you and this has nothing to do with you. Yes sometimes they may drag you into things but you should know that it is their problem and it is never your fault.

I hope things work out for you.

xx

gah sorry.. unnecessary double post. :P

My parents split up afew months ago, I am alittle happier now because both my parents seem alittle happier, and i can have 1 on 1 time with each of them. But i look forward going to my dads house going to movies, playing rockband, sports, eating out, ect. If your not mad at your dad try to call him every day or so so he doesn't feel bad. Remember this is not your fault and you shouln't be mad at yourself. Your going to have to choose who you would like to live with, remember that there both your parents and they both love you. Also if you ever get into a fight with one of them don't threaten to live with the other parent cause it makes them feel bad and you'll feel bad afterwords.