Really worried about guy friend...

fplan026 · 06-26-2008, 06:03 AM

So my best friend is a guy, and we've known each other for a fairly long time. I used to have a huge crush on him, but never did anything about it. I got a little mad at him for a while, but then eventually moved on and we became friends again. Last summer I was dating a boy, and I was really happy. He was oddly jealous though, and it kind of felt good after all I'd gone through with the unrequited love bit and all, but I really and truly had moved on.

We've both been through relationships lately, and neither of us is having too much luck, and we both seem to be getting our hearts broken.

The thing is, he’s been acting kind of weird lately. I mean, usually he will joke with me a lot, mostly by telling me lies about little things and then seeing my reaction (I am very gullible). But lately he’s been constantly lying to me. Like all the time. I mean, some of our conversations are just ridiculous because everything he says is really weird and random. He’ll always wait a couple of seconds and then tell me he was kidding, but still.

We’re really good friends though, and we do actually talk about important things in our lives, but I’ve just noticed lately that he’s been acting really weird. He calls me a lot just to talk, and we hang out all the time, which is fine, but like, I see him more than I used to see my boyfriend. He seems to get a little freaked out when I am unavailable; like he really really needs to talk to me or something.

I guess what I am wondering is this: should I be worried about him? I know he’s not on drugs, because we have a very open dialogue about that, and he’s taken a lot of steps to self improvement (he used to do drugs). I honestly would know if he was using. But could he have a mental condition? He’s pretty stressed about getting into university, and finding a job, but could he maybe have some serious issue he’s somehow trying to cover up? Is he scared that we’re too close and that maybe I’ll find something out about him that he doesn’t want me to know?

Or could he be crushing on me? It seems weird to me, but I can’t help wondering. He has a lot of friends who are female, and I know how he treats them, and how he sort of plays with their minds. He’s very clever, and he’s kind of irresistible when you’re getting to know him. But he doesn’t treat me like any of them. I just don’t know what to do. I really care for this guy, and I’m worried about him.

annabelle0000 · 06-26-2008, 06:19 AM

If you guys are such close friends you need to TALK TO HIM.
Communication is so essential!
I recently got really close with one of my guy friends. After about a week he told me he had a crush on me. I have a boyfriend (they go to the same school) so I was a little surprised. But we just talked it out and everything is fine now. We even make jokes about it. Yeah, so he still likes me, but it will pass

Umm... your mental condition queries could be relevant because of the fact he has done drugs. They do mess with your head so maybe if his behavior gets worse you should take him to a doctor. Or research it for further information.

xx

apollo-might · 06-26-2008, 07:03 AM

Maybe all the university and job stress is really getting to him and he just needs somebody constant and that he loves (ie; you) around so that he can get his mind off of it?
I'm not really sure. Just try to be there for him I guess.
If you guys are so close I can't imagine that he would keep something from you. Or maybe he is just trying to figure out the right way to say it (if there is something.)

misskiss · 06-26-2008, 02:40 PM

Maybe he is lonely and wants your attention. Talk to him about it.

fplan026 · 06-27-2008, 02:54 AM

Hey, thanks to all of you. I'm not used to strangers being so supportive and kind. So just thanks. This is all quite helpful :n)

Neal · 06-27-2008, 06:49 AM

If a guy all of a sudden starts acting weird, ask him why he's acting weird.
If a guy all of a sudden starts acting unusual, ask him why he's acting unusual.
If a guy all of a sudden starts acting like a dick, ask him why he's acting like a dick.
If a guy all of a sudden starts acting [synonym], ask him, you get it, but also ask him why the sudden change.

If a guy that you think likes you is randomly rude or mean to you, ask him why that too.

How else will you figure him out?

Neal C.