Alright, so I understand that this is a common issue, but I also just wanted to tell someone about my own personal story. I suppose it wasn't enough to simply research this topic all over the internet.

I've fallen in love with my best friend, quite hard actually. We've been best friends for a couple of years now, and I'd say I've been truly in love with her for a whole year and several months. I'm not sure about my sexuality classification, but I am certain that I am in love with this girl. I don't want nor have I ever wanted a girl like this before. Though I have loved my female friends quite deeply, I have not felt this intense physical longing for them.

Last summer, I confessed my love to her. She was flattered, but she told me that she did not love me "in that way". I told her that if I didn't tell her soon, I might have just leaned in and kissed her. I had already noticed that I was beginning to lean in ever so slightly when I got close to her. To that she laughed and blushed and said, "Well, it's a good thing that you didn't do that!" She also said that although she doesn't show it all that often, she considers herself "boy crazy". This led on to a discussion about my intense jealousy over her last boyfriend and explanations of my behavior. I was incredibly brave and open with her. During the boyfriend discussion, she said, "Well, you're still with me, and he's not." To which I replied, jokingly, "Yes, but he got the blowjob." Strangely, she thought this was exceedingly funny and affectionately told me so. I asked her if she thought these feelings might change, to which she replied, "I think that if I were going to have those feelings about you, I would have already had them." At the end of our conversation, she gave me a huge hug and said, "You're so awesome! Wow, that was so brave!"

So yes, after this I was extremely heartbroken for awhile, but not too long. I suppose what I did to console myself was adopt some courageous (possibly desperate) hope. Our friendship, from what I can tell, has grown stronger over this experience. I told her that above everything else, I would not sacrifice my friendship with her. I have held true to my word. From that point on, our relationship has continued as normal. She still undresses in front of me, we still hold hands, we still run our fingers through each other's hair, we still make flirty sexual comments, we still embrace each other often, we still cuddle, and we still kiss each other on the cheek or forehead from time to time. My ex-boyfriend tells me often that he thinks she's into me. He even jokes "Has [insert friend's name] come around yet?"

This friend of mine came to visit me this past weekend. We had a wonderful time and it was a great visit, and I can't stop thinking about it! However, I am truly concerned about my feelings for her. Sometimes I want her so badly that I feel like I MUST have her. Of course, I would never simply grab her and take her right then, no matter how much I might want to. I value her trust too much to act like that. However, there were a couple of moments where I had to physically turn away to stop myself from trying to kiss her. I'm fairly certain she is not aware of my inner conflict at all. This weekend, I experienced extreme sexual tension. One evening, I even had a sexual dream about her. And when she hugs me - because I'm rather short and she's rather tall - my face fits directly between her breasts, often brushing her soft skin against my cheeks. This happened a lot in the moments before she left, and my body burned white-hot for hours afterward. The tension was incredibly overwhelming and almost painful, I could concentrate on nothing else.

No matter whether her feelings have changed or not, I still firmly want to act in the best interests of our friendship. Nothing is worth losing her. Though our friendship is by no means fragile, I don't want to take any unnecessary risks. However, my feelings are not going away. If anything, they're growing in intensity. I don't know what to do, to be honest. I don't want to be a pervert, and I don't want to act outside of what she feels is appropriate. I know that I have not. I'm not even sure of what I want from her. An established romantic relationship? I honestly don't know. A kiss? Most definitely. Sex? Ehhh, I'm not sure. Love? Yes, I do want this from her. Affection? Yes!

I still have some hope, vain or not. However, I am greatly concerned about the possibility of her being involved with someone else. There has been no threat of that happening yet, but if and when it does, I know that I am going to have some serious problems!

I just feel like I should do something... But, I have no idea what to do! Can anyone offer me some advice?

it happens a lot hun and you truly love her i wouldnt give up thats a feeling hard to come by k good luck hun...when she sees that u been there for her most and through it all feelings can change. enjoy and value your relationship because thats what she is already ready for give her time

What a story you got there, Affinity. I can feel your inner conflict just by reading this thread. My advice is that... you have to wait. Give her time to think. If she's that "boy crazy" and sees you as "just a friend", then you have no choice but to go along with it. Forget everything you feel even if it takes every muscle in your system, you have to do it and move on. But, if you have given her enough time, there's a possibility that she might recognize her own feelings for you.

You'll just have to continue being a good friend that you are and be there whenever she needs you. I know she'll appreciate that no matter how the story ends.

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