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Old 06-22-2012, 06:15 AM   #1
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Question Please, social help needed.

I never truly had friends right now i'm 14 going into high school and I stayed back in seventh grade, i still get ridiculed for that and i have no friends what so ever i'm not sure what to do... My mother constantly puts me down and verbally depresses me. And i live to far to go into town and hang out with people "If i had people to hang out with" I'm kinda of a technical geeky type of person (not stereotypical) and have no mode of transportation. Please help.
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Old 06-22-2012, 10:30 AM   #2
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Re: Please, social help needed.

you can find friends online, do some video chats and such.. it would be fun.. I myself don't really hang out with my friends unless we are in school.. I'm a loner too, if I'm not around with my friends.. Do your best! and about your Mom, don't take it too seriously if what she'll say that will let you down.. Just think that it's an encouragement to do better..
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Old 06-22-2012, 10:36 AM   #3
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Re: Please, social help needed.

just try to be as friendly as possible to everyone, and smile because when people see you smiling you have a better chance of them wanting to talk to you, and the more people you know the more rides you can get...
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Old 06-24-2012, 12:36 AM   #4
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Re: Please, social help needed.

I rarely hang out with friends outside f school besides a couple friends right in my neighborhood so U wouldn't worry about that too much. Just go into high school with an open mind. I started high school with very few friends and i made alot of friends especially that share the same interests as me like video games.

---------- Post added at 01:06 PM ---------- Previous post was at 01:05 PM ----------

And as far as the stuff about your mom goes, I'm sorry I can't help I have never had any experience with verbally or physically abusive parents.
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Old 06-25-2012, 12:45 PM   #5
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Re: Please, social help needed.

Now a days their are number of ways you can go for social networking sites and find friends over theire.
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Old 06-26-2012, 11:31 AM   #6
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Re: Please, social help needed.

When i was your age (actually a year younger) i got into MMO's which are online games where people all around the world play and interact, i made a lot of friends on those games and played for a good 4-5 years. Internet friends end up being better then real life friends a lot of the time, that is until you get older and start wanting real life social interaction. You're still so young though, once you get into college and or late high school you'll probably have many friends, especially college.. thats when your life starts looking up (in my opinion).
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Old 06-26-2012, 01:50 PM   #7
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Re: Please, social help needed.

Ultimately, at your age, your best bet is to just lay low, and either confront your mom about what shes saying to you or just don't let her words get to your head. If you really want friends, go out and get them. At school, try to talk to people, get to know them. When they say something bad about you, brush it off and laugh when they say it or just flat out ignore it. You can't be happy if you let them keep you from being happy. You can make friends online by being brave enough to talk to others, join games, play MMO's, but if you're really set on making friends IRL, I'll give you all the support I can. Good luck out there.
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Old 06-29-2012, 11:22 PM   #8
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Re: Please, social help needed.

Yeah be someones internet bff. And really it's not too uncommon to not hang out all that much or with so many people during summer. When school starts though, you gotta man-up and talk to people. No one's gonna come up to you and say "wanna be best friends?" It may seem weird, but to make friends you actually have to meet and talk with people...
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Old 07-22-2012, 11:22 AM   #9
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Re: Please, social help needed.

Being lonely sucks, but extracurricular activies are a great way to change that. I was a total dork from 7th grade - sophmore year. Junior year I put down my xbox controller and set off to make some friends. I started of by volunteering at my local police department through a program called police explorers, it's a great place to volunteer at because all the kids are pretty clean-cut and no one is going to ridicule you in front of a cop.

Sports are another great way to make friends. Now if you're thinking "I'm not really an athelete" you need to stow that attitude and sign up for something! Go to the practices and you will get in shape, you will surely find a team mate that is willing to car pool. First time you show up to practice people might make fun of you, but if you keep your head up and work hard eventually you will earn your team mates respect.
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Old 07-23-2012, 09:03 AM   #10
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Re: Please, social help needed.

Have you ever said anything about it to your Mom? Also, where is your Dad?

I'm pretty shy myself, as it seems you are too. That's OK-- you just have to take it slow. Plus, you say you are ridiculed? Luckily for you, you're going into High School-- think of it as a way to start fresh, socially. You won't know most of the people there, and honestly, I don't think anyone will care about what went on in Middle School.

Transportation is definitely an issue, but how far are we talking? If it's only a few miles, you could ask your parents/friends to take you places.
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Old 10-07-2012, 08:26 AM   #11
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Re: Please, social help needed.

it's all going to change
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Old 10-09-2012, 05:39 PM   #12
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Re: Please, social help needed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by VideoGameAddict View Post
I never truly had friends right now i'm 14 going into high school and I stayed back in seventh grade, i still get ridiculed for that and i have no friends what so ever i'm not sure what to do... My mother constantly puts me down and verbally depresses me. And i live to far to go into town and hang out with people "If i had people to hang out with" I'm kinda of a technical geeky type of person (not stereotypical) and have no mode of transportation. Please help.
I know the quantity of friends seems like the most important thing when first getting into high school. But this is a wonderful opportunity to become a friend to yourself first, to get to know and develop yourself so that you can know the type of QUALITY of friends you would like to attract, both online and offline. As long as you stay confident in yourself and your uniqueness, then you will find friends who will value those aspects in you..who will care about you for who you truly are. You never want to "settle" into any type of friendship or relationship if it does not make you feel good about yourself.

I have never been verbally abused (at least not consistently by someone I lived with), but my mother has. And so the best advice on that I can give you is to just recognize that what your mother is saying to you is only a reflection of how she feels about herself. The fact that she takes out her self-hate and anger on her child only implies how deep her own wounds really are. Don't take it personally. Her words do not define who you are...only you can do that.

As for transportation: you can either get some exercise in and walk/ride your bike (if it's not too far), ask one of your parents or trusted relatives to take you, take the bus or some type of public transportation, or make some friends who can drive you places . If none of these work, better to stick to online/mobile communication.

Good luck!
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Old 10-10-2012, 01:14 AM   #13
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Re: Please, social help needed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by VideoGameAddict View Post
I never truly had friends right now i'm 14 going into high school and I stayed back in seventh grade, i still get ridiculed for that and i have no friends what so ever i'm not sure what to do... My mother constantly puts me down and verbally depresses me. And i live to far to go into town and hang out with people "If i had people to hang out with" I'm kinda of a technical geeky type of person (not stereotypical) and have no mode of transportation. Please help.
I'm like this. There is a group of 6 of us that I hang out with, the only thing I'm worried about is next year. The 5 people in my group are leaving school next year for college and I don't know what to do either. The only difference is that I live about 2 minutes outside town where 2 of the people live but we don't hang out. We only hang out in school.
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Old 10-10-2012, 07:08 AM   #14
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Re: Please, social help needed.

Best thing to do is try and make contact with the people you do associate yourself with online. Like skype.

I've never really had friends outside of school/college or a computer screen. I prefer it that way most of the time.
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Old 10-10-2012, 08:34 AM   #15
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Re: Please, social help needed.

U just gotta get out there and learn from experience how to make friends!
When u get to highschool give it like 2 months and you will eventually find people that in some way resemble who you are. I never really had friends in Middle School either, but High School was where I hit it off lol
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