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Old 08-13-2012, 04:28 AM   #1
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Is he harassing me?

Okay, this might sound a bit confusing but bear with it...

So a few months back I had a one-night stand with a guy I knew through a few of old friends. I'll also admit I was drunk at the time. Problem was, what I didn't know was that he was a lot older than I first thought he was and also...he'd just recently got engaged to his girlfriend of ten years. I felt really bad for his fiancée, took responsibly for everything and cut all contact with him.

Then a few days after he contacted me over Facebook asking whether I wanted to 'meet up' (obviously for sex). I said no, explained that I regretted what had happened and that we couldn't be friends or continue anything, because he had a life and a fiancée of his own. However then he started texting me constantly, ringing me and messaging me over Facebook, admitting he really liked me and would have split up with his fiancée just to be with me. This obviously made me feel really uncomfortable and I didn't reply to any of them and that's when he started asking why I was ignoring him. I finally got straight and told him again we couldn't be friends and to stop talking to me. He didn't get the message and continued anyway.

Now, whenever I go out with the same group of friends, word gets to him and he turns up, uninvited and tries it on with me again, which always ends the night with awkward conversations I didn't want to have with him. Also, it may be a little paranoia but I recently found out he's moving house with his fiancée and looking for a new house somewhere in my neighbourhood.

I don't know...does this sound like he's harassing me?
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Old 08-13-2012, 04:31 AM   #2
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Re: Is he harassing me?

That does sound a bit like harassment, and the fact that he'll give up his relationship for something like sex is very low and disrespectful.
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Old 08-13-2012, 04:34 AM   #3
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Re: Is he harassing me?

Thats what I thought, but he also claimed he loved me, which is why I feel like he's harassing me because it was literally just a one night stand. I feel like he's treating me like a child and stringing me along when I've got no interest in him. Now Im just paranoid he's going to move in near me
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Old 08-13-2012, 04:35 AM   #4
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Re: Is he harassing me?

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Originally Posted by Bethany View Post
Thats what I thought, but he also claimed he loved me, which is why I feel like he's harassing me because it was literally just a one night stand. I feel like he's treating me like a child and stringing me along when I've got no interest in him. Now Im just paranoid he's going to move in near me
Oh gosh that's bad I suppose it would be best to be firm and tell him to back off. I dunno if you'd tell his fiancé or something, but he'll have to stop at some point, and hopefully when he realizes what he's doing is wrong.
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Old 08-13-2012, 04:40 AM   #5
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Re: Is he harassing me?

Thats the thing though I've told him to back off and that I feel uncomfortable with him constantly talking to me. I feel like he's not going to give up until something happens, which I'm determined it's not. Everytime i say we can't be friends, he insists we can, which just sounds patronising to me.
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Old 08-16-2012, 01:27 PM   #6
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Re: Is he harassing me?

Yeah it does sound pretty harassing.
Next time you see him out and about though you should just walk over and be like, look right stop talking to me. Make him get the message, if all else fails .. you could just tell him you've got a boyfriend now ..
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