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Old 12-03-2012, 01:52 AM   #1
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In Need Of Advice...

Well... Lets start of with my story before we go onto my issue.
I'm a FTM transgender, free-spirited, friendly, atheist who is dating a gender fluid person. Being raised in a closed minded, religious, normal, mentally abusive family. I bet you can already see the problem? The only fair person in the family is my mother.
Thing is I have major anger issues, why? Because my dad is always so aggressive and negative and horrible person to my mother. I hate my dad.
I'm so angry that I feel one day I will simply lose it an attack my dad, despite my fair self control, since today... He RAGED (actual rage) at my mother. The reason? Because she gave her opinion on a song he made her listen to. Her opinion was that in one point of the song it was repetitive. He raged and said he just won't go to church with her then. Church is another thing that bothers me since I'm an 'in the closet' atheist.
I simply cannot stand my father! He is so traditional and closed minded, which I normally would ignore except... He FORCES what he thinks DOWN YOUR THROAT !!! He's just so... horrible getting upset just cause you disagree with him! Urgh, I hate him even more because once he hit my mother. He mentally abuses her and though she says nothing I can tell it's tearing her apart. I wish they'd get divorced just so my mom can be happy. But I know that would raise more complications.
I just need someone to tell me how to deal with all of this till I can just move out (which will be in 4/3 years).
Please I just can barely handle this, I used to think of suicide because of all this and I'm better now but still this is mentally eating me!
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Old 12-03-2012, 10:51 PM   #2
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Re: In Need Of Advice...

I come from a mentally and physically abusive father. Surprisingly, my mother hasn't left him even though lately she seems so unhappy. Mothers will sacrifice their happiness for their children's as a divorce will tear the family apart.
I absolutely hate my dad too. But, I still love him because my dad.
My advice to you is to be patient. Try and understand that your dad was probably brought up this way and now he's a grown man, it's impossible for him to change. I have a really hot temper, so I understand how hard it is to control. Try and talk to your dad about his behaviour, but if he'll just yell at you, then write him a letter and leave it for him to find while you're at school or something, so by the time you're home again, he would have cooled off. Also, try and keep in mind that no matter what he says, he will always love you as you're his baby. Even if you don't feel it, he works and provides for you food and shelter, so be grateful. Also, if you think what he's doing is illegal, like proper abuse, the last choice you can do is loose your father and report him to the police or wherever.
I've personally decided to just be patient, because he's my dad no matter what he does.
If you ever need to vent, just message me. xo
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