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Old 08-06-2007, 05:10 AM   #1
I miss you. =[

xxXRawrHelloKittyxxX's Avatar
Name: Fay
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My Mood:

xxXRawrHelloKittyxxX has much to be proud ofxxXRawrHelloKittyxxX has much to be proud ofxxXRawrHelloKittyxxX has much to be proud ofxxXRawrHelloKittyxxX has much to be proud ofxxXRawrHelloKittyxxX has much to be proud ofxxXRawrHelloKittyxxX has much to be proud ofxxXRawrHelloKittyxxX has much to be proud of

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It really hit home.

These past few days have really helped me to see something that most people tried and tried to imply into my head. I never really paid attention to it because I never really experienced the stuff they did or went through.

People always told me to tell those that I love that I loved them when I had the chance. Because people can leave faster and sooner before you can even mention you love them.

I spent like ten years with my great grandmother. She was always there for me when I needed someone to just talk to. About stuff other people would question. I remember clearly when I got hurt she would bandage me up and make sure I was okay. Or how at random moments she would reach into her purse and pull out two dollars for my brother and me. Little did I know, she was suffering from cancer. I guess I was just too young to understand it.

The doctors told us that she would only live for a while. I was at her house when she got rushed to the hospital. I was planning to see her come back home but she didn't. I got woke up at 2:45 in the morning to hear she was dying. I told her I loved her plenty times when she was alive but not enough. I believed in god during these times. I cried for about ten minutes cussing god out, telling him not to take her away. That I needed her more than anything. And about 3:10 I told god to take her because she was suffering in the hospital bed. At 3:15, she died.

I wish to this day I told her everyday I loved her, more than life itself. I regret that so much. As I grew up from that experience, I realised that life was extremely short. That our time here was limited. I began to tell those I loved that I loved them more than life at every chance I got. I have lost a lot of family members and friends from sickness and suicide. Not a day goes by that I wish I could have told them I loved them.

I lost one best friend that I miss more than life now. I never really told him that I loved him. I did but not enough. I just think, blah at the moment you don't understand what it's like to lose something. I do now.

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