Few years ago i used to lack confidence.
I used to think everyone was looking at me, even though they werent.
Very shy, struggled to talk to people i didnt know etc.

Now i feel quite confident, i can talk to any stranger, that ive never met, for the sake of a 30 second conversation.
I can walk into a room of people quite happily.
The only time i currently lack confidence is when i am around a girl who i really like and want to impress, but im working on it.

I found that 2 things helped me to improve my confidence.
I got a Job in a pub, started off as a Kitchen Porter and worked my way up to Waitor then Head Waitor.
Due to being there for a long time i saw staff come and go, i also ended up having to take orders, take meals out etc... At first i was nervous but when i just had to keep throwing my self into the situation i became more and more confident, had a joke with customers and of course i had to speak to people i never even knew.
Alot of the time i wouldnt see them again, so i knew it didnt matter to much if i made a fool of my self.
This benefitted me alot, having to meet new people, interact and give a good service

also as i progressed at Karate i had to start to look after beginners, teach them the basics and help them with their first sessions.

So what i suggest to you is, find something you feel good at, something that you will enjoy which could lead to you meeting new people and interacting.
This could be a job
a hobby
maybe just going bowling with aload of friends and get them to invite new people along, and just introduce your self straight away
Hi, how are you? ask couple questions to get to know them.

The more you do this your confidence will grow

Keep your chin up, ignore the thoughts of caring what other people think.
If you are happy with who you are, people will pick up on it and happily accept you for who you are.

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Seek help from a shrink/councellor?

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Try walking around a mall or other area of significant population of people you are unlikely to see again unless you want to (eg get their number or give yours) and just talk to people to practice. Maybe a good first step would just be introducing yourself and getting their name, and work up from there?

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Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.

I had the same problems for a while. It took me a while to realize it but it was caused by my fathers death. I coped by using drugs. Drugs made the tensity of a situation go away. It's like it opened the doors to being myself.

Just whenever you want to say something but your afraid to say it, then force yourself to say it. Be prideful and don't use drugs to help or it will just make it worse.

Maybe you just don't see a reason to talk to strangers? Maybe you're just more comfortable on my own.

For me, I'm a complete loner, and like it that way. I'm not shy though, because I'm that kid who freaks all the girls out by jumping through hallways and rolling down stairs, and pisses off other guys by jumping out at them with irrelevant comments and then proceeding to dive roll down a hallway. If I wanted to I could go hang out with a bunch of idiots, but screw it I like being on my own

Hi
First, i dont want to try and be pushing u into a category or trying to label u, but this sounds a lot like something i have struggled with whish is diagnosed as Avoidant Personality Disorder.
It's natural to worry about what someone thinks of u and the impression u are making on them but like u say, not the to the extent that u are experincing it.
Options available are talking to someone in the psychiatrist profession who will listen to u and give u some proffesional advice from their view and experiences of how ppl can overcome this. Another thing is group therapys are available where u will be able to meet other ppl who share this thouht patterns. It maybe sounds intimidating at the thouht of meeting all of these new ppl but when u understand that they all share the same thouht patterns and conscions as u do its kind of like u both have the connection to understand each other better, whish will naturally encourage new friendships. And having close friends will give u confidence as when u are with them u wont feel so alone and like ppl are judging u or looking at u, as u say are feelings that u have struggled with.
So increasing social contacts will build confidence in u as these friends are proof that u are an enjoyable person to be around. When u are meeting new ppl and start to feeling these anxietys again u shoult take a breath and remember that the person wont be judging u how u think they are and they are just seeing u as a normal person without these thouts in ur head of feeling self-conscious.

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Hi! I really feel for you.. I know it can be hard in social situations to feel "normal" and interact "normally", but let me tell you from experience that people get bored with average people. Be yourself, and I guarantee that people will like you because of what you have to say and offer. Sometimes I read facingtheworldbook.com to get advice on self-esteem or tips on how to act and look more confident. Maybe it will help you

you do realize this topic is over 2 months old, right?

Relax, dont think. DO.

empty your mind, focus on breathing.

when the person comes to you or starts to talk, just let it flow, throw aside logic and worrie. relax, dont be your self, be nothing. be a blank, auto-thinking machine.

when you get more and more useto it, you'll feel better in socail situations.


when you get confused or you believe your thoughts dont make sence, write them down, organize them, sort them, and THAN continue with the arguement.

over time you'll beable to do this in your head rather than visually.

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rep me! Always hear to help!
This world is one of sadness. happiness fades in time, but Sorrow is eternal and everlasting within this world of darkness... My M.S.N. shadow.corp@hotmail.com