Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

    • Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Hello I'm 16 years old (highschool)
      let's just get to the point -->some ,let's call them "friends" tried to make me happy because I was ver yshy and lonely (no real friends),and girls used to say "wanna be my boyfriend"'fake of course) ,
      now It's summer, you know , none talked to me literally,I'm always chilling at home i don't go out because I don't have any friends I'm always chilling at home ,i don't go out because my parents used to hit me even at 15 yrs old,I scream ofc and ppl outside heard me so i don't feel like going out (scared if they laugh at me)
      when i was 12 we moved to a nearby city i used to go out sometimes when i used to play with kids , I noticed that they are making fun of me idk why...
      Anyway Let's go back to the friends' issue, as i mentioned earlier i have no real friends ,*It's funny because i added like 13 ppl of my clasds on facebook, but none talks to me..everything was FAKE ...thinking about cutting myself even though i never done it before..and just to mention i look ugly irl (atleast I think so --> I have a big head and ppl used to make fun of my head)
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Dark Universe wrote:

      Im will be happy to be your friend.


      no I'm not looking for internet friends man...real friends IRL,how to mprove my social skills..how to gather strength to go outta house...

      ---------- Post added at 02:35 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:33 PM ----------

      Hipster wrote:

      To start things off, please elaborate on that first thing you said: "friends" tried to make you happy?


      you can replace friends by random classmates i guess?I'm very shy so i think talking to a shy guy is fun for them..
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Well, this is obviously going to be difficult advice, but there isn't much besides this that you can do:
      Talk to people. I know that's easier said than done, and for a large portion of my life that was extremely difficult for me. You have to try and get to know people, whether that's people in your class, groups, clubs. You won't get to know people if you don't put an effort.
      You said that nobody talks to you. Have you tried talking to them? Try and start a conversation next time, with somebody on facebook.
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      I want to talk to people OUTISDE, but I just can't.. the girl i liked never talks to me
      I'm afraid of going out..ppl will make fun of me

      ---------- Post added at 02:48 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:45 PM ----------

      Hipster wrote:

      Well, this is obviously going to be difficult advice, but there isn't much besides this that you can do:
      Talk to people. I know that's easier said than done, and for a large portion of my life that was extremely difficult for me. You have to try and get to know people, whether that's people in your class, groups, clubs. You won't get to know people if you don't put an effort.
      You said that nobody talks to you. Have you tried talking to them? Try and start a conversation next time, with somebody on facebook.


      I tried talking to people a while ago,I feel that they're just waiting for the convo to end (giving automatic answers)
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Andrax wrote:

      I want to talk to people OUTISDE, but I just can't.. the girl i liked never talks to me
      I'm afraid of going out..ppl will make fun of me

      ---------- Post added at 02:48 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:45 PM ----------



      I tried talking to people a while ago,I feel that they're just waiting for the convo to end (giving automatic answers)

      What do you mean? How were the conversations? What did you talk about?
      And as for the girl that you like, do you talk to her at all? Have you shown any interest in her?
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Hipster wrote:

      What do you mean? How were the conversations? What did you talk about?
      And as for the girl that you like, do you talk to her at all? Have you shown any interest in her?


      the convos was basically hi that's all,some ppl at hs evne called me gay for not talking to girls
      as for the girl,I'm too shy to talk to her,I'm pretty sure she dosen't like me back anyway..
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Why does it matter if people make fun of you? I make fun of people I like all the time, and they make fun of me, too. Don't take your image so seriously. You have to know how to laugh at yourself.

      Not everyone is going to be interested in what you have to talk about. Just like you're not going to be interested in everything everyone else has to talk about. You can make yourself more learned and experienced in ... stuff, though, which will increase your chances of having something interesting to say.

      Don't take it seriously or let it bother you if someone calls you gay or whatever. Lots of people have called me gay, in varying levels of seriousness, and it doesn't phase me because (1) I know I'm not gay, (2) they're usually just teasing, and (3) there's nothing wrong with being gay, anyway, and if they think there is, they're therefore not a person whose opinion I take seriously. At my cousin's buck's night, one of the nude girls accused me of being gay 'cause I was the only guy not staring at her chest :p .

      So you're too shy. There you go, you've *identified a problem that you can work on*. "I'm shy" is not a resting place. It's not like "Okay, I'm shy. That's me. It's forever to be this way and I just have to work around that". No. You just *stop* being shy. Just go ahead and ACT LESS SHY. Say the things you want to say, without thinking yourself out of saying them.
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      cool_walking_ wrote:

      Why does it matter if people make fun of you? I make fun of people I like all the time, and they make fun of me, too. Don't take your image so seriously. You have to know how to laugh at yourself.

      Not everyone is going to be interested in what you have to talk about. Just like you're not going to be interested in everything everyone else has to talk about. You can make yourself more learned and experienced in ... stuff, though, which will increase your chances of having something interesting to say.

      Don't take it seriously or let it bother you if someone calls you gay or whatever. Lots of people have called me gay, in varying levels of seriousness, and it doesn't phase me because (1) I know I'm not gay, (2) they're usually just teasing, and (3) there's nothing wrong with being gay, anyway, and if they think there is, they're therefore not a person whose opinion I take seriously. At my cousin's buck's night, one of the nude girls accused me of being gay 'cause I was the only guy not staring at her chest :p .

      So you're too shy. There you go, you've *identified a problem that you can work on*. "I'm shy" is not a resting place. It's not like "Okay, I'm shy. That's me. It's forever to be this way and I just have to work around that". No. You just *stop* being shy. Just go ahead and ACT LESS SHY. Say the things you want to say, without thinking yourself out of saying them.


      thank you very much :)
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      cool_walking_ wrote:

      Why does it matter if people make fun of you? I make fun of people I like all the time, and they make fun of me, too. Don't take your image so seriously. You have to know how to laugh at yourself.

      Not everyone is going to be interested in what you have to talk about. Just like you're not going to be interested in everything everyone else has to talk about. You can make yourself more learned and experienced in ... stuff, though, which will increase your chances of having something interesting to say.

      Don't take it seriously or let it bother you if someone calls you gay or whatever. Lots of people have called me gay, in varying levels of seriousness, and it doesn't phase me because (1) I know I'm not gay, (2) they're usually just teasing, and (3) there's nothing wrong with being gay, anyway, and if they think there is, they're therefore not a person whose opinion I take seriously. At my cousin's buck's night, one of the nude girls accused me of being gay 'cause I was the only guy not staring at her chest :p .

      So you're too shy. There you go, you've *identified a problem that you can work on*. "I'm shy" is not a resting place. It's not like "Okay, I'm shy. That's me. It's forever to be this way and I just have to work around that". No. You just *stop* being shy. Just go ahead and ACT LESS SHY.Say the things you want to say, without thinking yourself out of saying them.


      There's nothing wrong with being an introvert. Some people are just naturally quiet. But if your shyness has gotten to the point where it's controlling your life, you need to get OVER your shyness. Do what you want to do, and say what you want to say, and don't worry about what other people think about you because FUCK THEM THEY DONT MATTER. And it won't be easy. You won't be perfect. You'll screw things up and make awkward mistakes. But that's OK. You have to learn to forgive yourself for your mistakes.

      But I guess I'm in no position to be giving you advice. I'm terrible at making friends...all the friends I make either forget about me or turn out to be hypocritical bitches. Maybe you should try this website...I used to go on there a long time ago and it kinda helped. :)
      Hope is like a butterfly, it can be killed with one quick movement.
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Viaa wrote:

      Things will get better for you. I was in a situation like that a while ago.
      Do you have family members around your age?


      I have 2 sisters (older than me)
      Also , do you think I should text the girl I like on facebook?didn't talk to hner like 2 months ago
      It's awkward to talk to a girl on FB when you I can't talk to her irl :(
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Andrax wrote:

      I have 2 sisters (older than me)
      Also , do you think I should text the girl I like on facebook?didn't talk to hner like 2 months ago
      It's awkward to talk to a girl on FB when you I can't talk to her irl :(

      Absolutely, it's making conversation! Think about things you want to ask. Like, how she is, how her summer is, etcetera.
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      Andrax wrote:

      I have 2 sisters (older than me)
      Also , do you think I should text the girl I like on facebook?didn't talk to hner like 2 months ago
      It's awkward to talk to a girl on FB when you I can't talk to her irl :(


      Message her on FB . Try keeping a convo going thru messages and stuff, then when you think youvhave the strength, ask her out on a date or ask her if she wants to hang out with you sometime. PM me whatever you need and I'm more than happy to help. Ive been thru what your going thru so I know from experience
    • Re: Lack of social life.0 friends..Please help me.

      icy, I'm not sure whether you're trying to disentangle the concepts of shyness and introversion, or to entangle them. I didn't say they were the same thing. Shyness and being introverted are different things. Shyness is being afraid to do what you really want to do or say, and I don't see how that can be a good thing for anyone. Being quiet isn't being shy.

      10 Myths About Introverts | CarlKingdom.com :: Writer. Director. Artist.