Would trying FWB be alright in this case?

    • Would trying FWB be alright in this case?

      Alright, here's the situation lol. My ex-girlfriend and I broke up almost a month ago. Things we going terrible for us and we both just wanted to end the relationship even though we still really liked each other. The main reason we broke up was because we never got to see each other or "get physical" with each other. We just didn't want the pressure of keeping a relationship. We dated for 5 months and never got to have sex or anything with each other, it was very frustrating because both of us explicitly said we wanted to have sex multiple times while dating and never got to. We broke up and well, we still text slightly dirty to each other and often have conversations about sex. ex: she told me how to pick up a girl to have sex with the other day. And snap chat sometimes gets interesting lol... I don't know if she is hinting that she wants to have sex with me even though we broke up, or is just messing with me because she just likes someone to flirt with!

      Near the time we broke up she sent me a message saying "I've always wanted a fwb, no strings attached." At the time I was just freaked out by the message, but now i'm really thinking about proposing the idea of actually being FWB. I want to have sex with her and she really seems to want to have sex with me. We are not dating, but are still friends and halfway comfortable around each other. But, I can see her flirting with me in a sexual manor and then completely backing out if I tried to make a move on her. I'll be going to college in about 4 months too so dating again would not be a good idea. I don't think she wants to date either. It seems we both just want to have sex and lose our virginity to each other (yea that's part of it too lol). I know FWB is notoriously dangerous, but it seems to be what we both want and we still have trust built up from dating. Still liking and trusting each other could be both good and bad in being FWB it seems.

      So, what should I do about this? Nothing? Tell her to stop sending me messages with sexual hints? or try to see if she really does want fwb?

    • Re: Would trying FWB be alright in this case?

      alex6499 wrote:

      Alright, here's the situation lol. My ex-girlfriend and I broke up almost a month ago. Things we going terrible for us and we both just wanted to end the relationship even though we still really liked each other. The main reason we broke up was because we never got to see each other or "get physical" with each other. We just didn't want the pressure of keeping a relationship. We dated for 5 months and never got to have sex or anything with each other, it was very frustrating because both of us explicitly said we wanted to have sex multiple times while dating and never got to. We broke up and well, we still text slightly dirty to each other and often have conversations about sex. ex: she told me how to pick up a girl to have sex with the other day. And snap chat sometimes gets interesting lol... I don't know if she is hinting that she wants to have sex with me even though we broke up, or is just messing with me because she just likes someone to flirt with!

      Near the time we broke up she sent me a message saying "I've always wanted a fwb, no strings attached." At the time I was just freaked out by the message, but now i'm really thinking about proposing the idea of actually being FWB. I want to have sex with her and she really seems to want to have sex with me. We are not dating, but are still friends and halfway comfortable around each other. But, I can see her flirting with me in a sexual manor and then completely backing out if I tried to make a move on her. I'll be going to college in about 4 months too so dating again would not be a good idea. I don't think she wants to date either. It seems we both just want to have sex and lose our virginity to each other (yea that's part of it too lol). I know FWB is notoriously dangerous, but it seems to be what we both want and we still have trust built up from dating. Still liking and trusting each other could be both good and bad in being FWB it seems.

      So, what should I do about this? Nothing? Tell her to stop sending me messages with sexual hints? or try to see if she really does want fwb?


      So how do you expect FWB if its something you weren't even able to do in a relationship normally?

    • Re: Would trying FWB be alright in this case?

      Hipster wrote:

      So how do you expect FWB if its something you weren't even able to do in a relationship normally?


      Good point. That is pretty much a deal breaker. The only way I can say is with some sneaking around it could be done. Just send a text "meet up at xxxxx for some fun!" haha! We never tried to sneak around when we were dating and I wouldn't say until the latter part of our relationship were we even trusting enough with each other to think about going further. We still have that trust IMO, just not the obligation to keep a strong relationship. FWB is probably never a good idea lol. I just may have come across a situation where it may be acceptable.