Only In America

Mayank · 08-27-2008, 01:14 AM

ELEVEN HUMOROUS ANECDOTES ABOUT LIFE IN AMERICA:

1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America......do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America.....do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

11. Only in America......can a homeless combat veteran live in a cardboard box and a draft dodger live in the White House. (This was popular when Clinton was in office)

E. Nygma · 08-27-2008, 07:31 AM

You've made good points there.

LovetoLive · 08-27-2008, 07:36 AM

"5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters."
We have this haha.
Funny though

.

Timmarus · 08-27-2008, 11:05 PM

Lol! All Of This Is True!

spacer · 08-28-2008, 01:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mayank

4. Only in America......do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

less calories lol

E. Nygma · 08-28-2008, 01:13 AM

Diet Coke tastes like shit.

The Wolf · 08-28-2008, 07:58 AM

I'm pretty sure the Braille on the ATM is used.

Everything else was good though.

Shadow-Koumajutsu · 08-28-2008, 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mayank

4. Only in America......do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

I especially laughed at this one, because I work at a fast food restaurant (albeit not as unhealthy as MacDonald's, but still fast food nonetheless) and we get orders like that all the time.

Pro-tip people; whether you're drinking regular soda or diet is not going to make much difference when you're eating 800-1000 calories of grease and bread.

apollo-might · 08-28-2008, 12:09 PM

Quote:

2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

Pretty funny but this one makes no sense to me... What if they're coming to see their grandchild ice skate or something??
And also, people who drink diet coke generally enjoy the taste more (I don't understand how)

Shadow-Koumajutsu · 08-28-2008, 12:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by apollo-might

Pretty funny but this one makes no sense to me... What if they're coming to see their grandchild ice skate or something??
And also, people who drink diet coke generally enjoy the taste more (I don't understand how)

I've only known like... two people who genuinely liked the taste of diet soda more than the original. >_>

Everyone else I see drinking it usually drinks it because they're diabetic, or want to lose/not gain any weight.

apollo-might · 08-28-2008, 12:36 PM

seriously?
most people I know that actually ACTIVELY drink diet soda over regular soda are drinking it because they prefer the taste.

Shadow-Koumajutsu · 08-28-2008, 12:40 PM

Haha, weird. My ex-shift leader at Arby's loved Diet Pepsi, but he's one of the only people I know who does. I myself think it tastes okay, but I wouldn't drink it if there was any other choice.

apollo-might · 08-28-2008, 01:37 PM

I totally forgot there was a Diet Pepsi!