Ever since my sophomore year in high school started, things have been going straight downhill for me.

So there's this guy. That I met last year. We've been great friends. Until about July or so. He asked me out. I had never had a real boyfriend before, so I said yes. But I didn't really like him like that. So about a month later I broke up with him. TWO days later, no joke... two days later my BEST friend and him hooked up. Even though I didn't like him anymore, it still made me upset. To make things worse I had to spend the rest of the evening with them. I was a total 3rd wheel. So they broke up like 3 days later. She said he wasn't her type.
A little bit about me and my best friend.
She's really pretty and skinny, popular and completely boy obsessed. She has a new boyfriend about every two or three weeks.
I'm not exactly the most gorgeous girl you've seen. I'm so self-concious and insecure about my body it's unreal.
Back to my story. Two weeks or so later, he invited me to the movies. And he started flirting with me. Alot. And I asked him if he still liked me... and he said yes. I told him that I still liked him, but I didn't want to have a relationship with him because it was akward the last time we dated. So we decided to be "friends with benefits" is what we called it. We acted just like boyfriend and girlfriend, but we didn't say that we were. Kinda weird I know. He told me he cared abot me more than anything in the world. He loved me. We were so close. I almost loved him back. I liked him so much, when I was around him, everything was just perfect. He made me feel like the prettiest girl in the world. The only thing was he is a COMPLETE manwhore. He flirts with anything on two legs. But he told me I was the one that he wanted... that I was special. And I believed him. So a month later me and him and my best friend and a few others were hanging out. That ENTIRE day my best friend and him were flirting. Just non stop. I caught her laying on top of him in his arms. She said that it was because he was the only single guy there that she could flirt with. So I yelled at her. She can have any guy she wants practically... and when I finally get one that likes me back she has to go screw it up for me. She apologized. And promised that it would never happen again. So about a week ago... he invited me to go watch the school play, wich my best friend had a very minor roll in. So she was backstage texting the entire time. So as soon as I get there he's like 'hey can I borrow your phone so I can text her?'.
So I suspected he was just using me to get to her.
They both assured me it wasn't true. So there was a football game that all three of us were at the next week. He was texting her off my phone. Again. And when I read through their messages... apparently he tried to kiss her. So I asked her, she said "yeah its not going to happen again, I promise." Then she COMPLETELY went off on him. She said, and I quote "We are JUST going to be friends. And I can promise you, that is how it is going to stay. Period."
So for some reason... he starts sort of ignoring me. And being really mean to me. So I'm really upset. And I'm talking to her about it. And shes like "Oh, he's stupid, you need to leave him, you're too good for him" and all that. Ten minutes later. She quite bluntly tells me she likes him. And I already know he likes her back. The asked if I would be okay with them dating. I said yes. But I really wasn't. I just didn't think it would be right of me to stand in their way like that. So their dating now. And things have just been getting worse with me. I'm an emotional wreck. I just can't stand seeing them together anymore. The little things bother me so much. I used to constantly play with his hair. He said I was the only one he allowed to do that. He said it annoyed him when anyone else did. So what do I see happening? She plays with his hair. And he used to Spiderman kiss me... well thats what me and my friends call it... its a term for kissing upside down. I see him doing the same thing to her. He used to hug me around the waste and try to make me loose my balance, then catch me at the last second. All of this stuff that he used to do to me, he's now doing to her. And it makes me sick inside. So I finally got the courage to tell her how I really felt about them dating. She kinda beat around the bush about it, but her undertone said "I know exactly how much this is hurting you, but I don't really care." She said she really likes him this time around. And I just can't stand it anymore. I want him back so badly it's unreal.

Well to be honest you guys were only in a relationship for about a month. The friends with benefits thing is fine until one person gets attached. You two never made a commitment to each other so he wasnt cheating on you. You were the one who broke up with him the first time and then told him you didnt want a relationship the second time. Maybe he thinks that his love for you will never be returned so he gave up and moved on, and it just happened to be with your friend. If he is a manwhore and your friend has a new guy every couple weeks then i say they belong together and they wont last long at all. If you still want him back just be there for him and stop worrying about what your friend thinks. Let him know that you want a relationship again and be serious and dont leave things cryptic.

i cnt give advice but i reali wana hug you
x

Oh, I know he wasn't cheating on me. I can never say he cheated on me, because we were'nt technically in a relationship. I know how much he was attached to me though. He never left my side. Every day he wanted to hang out. He constantly wrote me notes. After school and on weekends he would call me all the time. He'd leave me IMs just to say 'I love you'. And after I had a fight with him when we were still "friends" he went home and cut himself :|
It was kinda scary. I felt so bad.

u know what I think about this

i didnt read the whole thing b/c its a little long...i just skimmed it.

but it seems to me that your friend is a bitch and you need to tell her to stop going for the guys you're dating. and you need to tell her that it does bother you!

Well. I can't believe it... well I can kind of believe it but she broke up with him.
I swear. Yesterday she was like "He's so amazing, I like him a lot." And today she's all "I don't think I like him anymore." And then breaks up with him,
It was sad too.
We were sitting in 2nd period, all three of us have that class together so we all sit together. And he wrote her a note saying "I'm so glad I have you, you're so pretty, you mean the world to me..." etc and then she writes back just breaking up with him like its nothing.

I'm kinda sad for him.

First off, I see your display picture and you are a very beautiful girl so don't have any doubts about it or be self-conscious, and I'm sure your weight is fine just be happy with yourself no matter what if it's not good enough for anyone else the hell with them what matters is that you're happy with yourself, which you should be because like I said you are a pretty girl.
It does sound like this guy was using you as bait and he sounds like a complete liar but in spite of that you still seem to have feelings for him, so try avoiding them for awhile tell your friend you just need some time to yourself and I'm sure she will understand. If he's going to treat you like crap then screw him he doesn't deserve you at all. You'll come across someone so much better, you'll see.

ha...what a shitty way to break up with someone