Let me start by introducing myself, my name is Scotty. I have the 80's long hair, and I love classic Rock music such as KISS, Iron Maiden, Dio, Motley Crue etc. I listen to this music because, it makes me feel good about myself, and puts me in a good mood no matter what.
Once somebody got to know me, I believe that I am a very goofy, non-serious person, but that's enough about me for now. I am going to throw all my problems at you right now, and any feedback would be appreciated.
Problem #1
I am 15 years old, going on 16 in 2 months. I'm going to start by saying that I love my mother very much. She feeds me and puts a roof over my head, but I don't like her at all. She always seems to put her boyfriends over me and my brother. (She basically moves in with every guy she sleeps with.) She also works 2nd shift, so I only see her two or three days a week. So as you can probably imagine, we don't really have any kind of relationship, at all. Moving can really put stress on a kid, but in most cases it's ok, because they will eventually get used to the new environment. My case however is different, as this is my 14th home, my environment is constantly changes around me, and I am one of those kids that fear change. I haven't been to the same school since 6th grade, and now I am a Sophomore. So basically I have no social life what so ever. It really does hurt, not ever knowing anybody, or being able to conjure up the courage to talk to anyone. So every day I am basically at home, doing the same old thing every single day. As you can probably imagine, I have no self-esteem what so ever, and have pretty much given up on making any friends at all. I honestly believe if it wasn't for my music pulling me through, I wouldn't be here today.
So what should I do in a situation like this? Moping around at night constantly thinking of what other kids are doing on Saturday nights while I stay home in the country doesn't help at all. I also have the infamous girl problem. I have several pathetic stories on this, but I'm just gonna say I can't talk to them...
Some people have told me to focus on the positive things in life, and that would help very much. Which leads me into my second problem.
Problem #2
All positive things in my life I can sum up in one word,
Dad. Moving in with him would make my life much better. We have a great relationship, we actually enjoy being with each other, never an awkward moment. We agree on all types of music, he doesn't go crazy and start screaming at every little thing I do, (like my mom) and He puts us first, he really loves and cares for us. That and, I have never caught myself being sad and moping around, it's just a happier environment for me there. Now one would say, "Why don't you just live with your father?" There's a problem there now. First of all, my brother isn't old enough yet to choose who he can live with, and our Mother has legal custody, my brother is my best friend, and I cannot leave him. So I will have to wait another year, which by then, I will be 16, close to 17 years old. So, my childhood is basically over then. I feel that If I don't make friends, or get a girlfriend in the next few years, I'm screwed. I know that as soon as I am 18, it's gonna be the same routine til I die. Another problem is even if I do get old enough and try to move out, I can't stand the fact of breaking my mom's heart. She does love us, I know this, but I just can't stand living with her anymore. When we get in a argument, she always turns the blame on me, saying that I am not perfect, and it's my fault that I don't have any friends. What I am trying to say is, I believe her when she says these things, but I really don't think they are true, and I have to good of a heart to tell her everything I feel. When I do try talking to her, she just gets mad and yells at me.
So what I am asking, how should I approach this situation?
Problem #3
Okay, I admit, this is a silly one.
Remember how I told you that I have long hair? Well, before the year began, as much as I hate it, I went to get it cut, because it does need to be done. I told her exactly how I wanted it, even length. When I was getting it cut, I was not facing the mirror. She starts cutting my hair into layers, and I thought something was strange, but I didn't say anything. Then she takes my bangs and
THWAK!!! My bangs are gone!!! "What the hell!" I said. She replied, "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you'd look better like Bon Jovi..." So now I have a major mullet... This really takes down my self-esteem, because I don't think it's a very good way to make a impression at a new school. I'm gonna have to go like this for about a year... So that sucks...
So... I guess that's it in a nutshell... I do have more problems I could be talking about, but these are the ones that are troubling me the most. Thank you for taking your time to read.
*Peace*
Scotty,
Linear Mode
