How to Stop Swearing

*Rocky* · 05-27-2008, 06:42 AM

How to Stop Swearing

Steps

Recognize that you have a problem. Swearing is a dangerous habit that leads to other outrageous behavioral problems. A habit is always difficult to break, so the first thing that you need to do is recognize that you have a problem with swearing. If every second word is #!% this and !^#% that, then you have a problem. If you think the only cool way to reply to a friend, parent, teacher or co-worker is with an expletive, then you have a problem. If you don't know how to speak comfortably without swearing, then you have a problem.

Understand why you swear. Is it because you hang around with co-workers in a job nobody much enjoys and swearing is a way of toughing it out? Is it because the cool crowd uses it as virtually the only way to speak? Is it because you are practicing defiance against a parent, teacher or significant other? Is it because you are angry, sad or afraid and can't express yourself more clearly (e.g. when something goes wrong shopping, driving, playing or at work, etc.)?

Know why you want to stop swearing. This isn't trite - you really must want to stop the habit in order to challenge it. If you are half-hearted or only doing it for a lark, you won't stop. You really must want to stop. Think about all the reasons why life will be better if you do stop. That is the best way to find the motivation to want to stop. Write them down if it helps.

Make a commitment with yourself to stop. It's easier said than done, as it requires concerted effort and constant self-feedback. Be goal-oriented and choose a period of time during which you will try not to swear. Write down the following:

Why you think you swear (e.g., the triggers, the reasons)

Why you want to stop swearing (e.g., better communication, better job prospects, better relationships with other people, brighter outlook on life, etc.)

Triggers you know will set you off (e.g., anger, certain company you keep, activities, music, TV programs, supermarket queues, weather...)

Ways you think you can either avoid or lessen these triggers (e.g., don't drive in icy weather, don't listen to music with expletives peppered through it, don't rise to bite back at your parents/spouse when they nag you, tell your friends you've had it with swearing, etc).

Express yourself better. Civilized and respectful conversation is not a swearing contest. You owe it to yourself to find the vast array of other wonderful words your language provides to fill up your conversations. If you don't, you are limiting your own ability to clearly and accurately express your feelings and thoughts to other human beings and ultimately, you will be less accepted and understood by those around you. When you find yourself about to swear, make it a point to find another word or phrase that will better convey the same emotion or message. Find alternate words to substitute in place of expletives and discipline to use those instead.

Accept responsibility. Only you can prevent forest fires. Be prepared for some people to feel threatened by your stand. Tell them that it is a personal decision to better yourself and that they aren't being asked to stop doing anything. Still, you're setting a good example to them in the long run and some may be so impressed they'll copy. For those who disdain you for it, consider how much you really need their friendship; friends are supposed to be supportive.

Enlist support. Ask for the help of non-swearing/infrequently swearing friends and family (including spouse). Tell them you realize you have a problem and that you need to change. Make sure you pick non-judgmental helpers, though; you only want gentle reminders, not lectures or score-keeping. They may also have advice to offer on helping you to stop.

Find substitute words. Think of less offensive words that can be easily substituted for swear words. This allows you to maintain your normal sentence structure even when you eliminate swear words. For example, "garbage" and "flip" can be used in place of some swear words. Or, "mocksucker." Or perhaps, "grashole." Every time a swear word slips out, rephrase the statement using the substitute word. e.g., "Truck you, grasshole!" Soon you will find that the swear word is replaced by the substitute word both in your vocabulary and in your mind.

Punish yourself. Every time you swear, put money in a swear jar for charity. This is something that should be done at work also, to encourage co-workers who swear to stop. Be careful though because this might backfire, since they might think that they do not really have to stop swearing, since the money is going to a good cause. You could instead choose to call it "The beer jar," or "Friday night fun."

Reward yourself. When you go for a day, a week or similar time space, reward yourself with something - a CD, some clothing, a movie, a day free from chores.

Persevere. Swearing won't stop overnight - if it has become a habit, it is second nature for you to respond this way. Don't beat yourself up about lapses. Like dieting, you simply stop doing the bad thing and start over again from that moment. It isn't fatal and it doesn't mean you'll never stop. It just means you are easing out of the old habit slowly and you're encountering a few hitches along the way. Keep trying!

*Rocky* · 05-27-2008, 06:43 AM

Tips

Don't feel you'll always have to avoid swearing altogether (unless you want to); there are occasions in life when even the most mild-mannered person will let go of an expletive - for reasons such as pain, horror or loss. The idea is to stop using it as a major source of communicating your thoughts, behaviour and language.
Research has shown that 21 days can break a bad habit. Use this to set a goal for yourself - no swearing for a period of 21 days!
Learn more words if you need to. English and all other languages are full of amazing words that will help you truly express yourself and get your real meaning across to others. Subscribe to Internet sites that give you a 'word a day' or read dictionary lists that relate to emotional expression and feelings.
If you use swearing as a source of attention, ask yourself what is lacking in your life and try to work on improving that aspect of yourself. If you feel easily confronted by other people, seek out groups that teach you about improving self-confidence, assertiveness training and learning to feel at ease in social situations (including crowds). If you prefer one-to-one, ask your doctor or find a psychologist to assist you.
If you want to swear because something has upset you, count to 10 and take really deep breaths. In the time you do this, the moment will pass.
Exercise off your anger and frustration. This avoids the need to speak, let alone swear and will keep you in good condition, respecting and caring for yourself.
You may think that the words only mean what you intend them to mean, however, it is what the listener interprets them to mean that is relevant in any social context. Some words have different shades of meaning in different contexts. Some words may be inappropriate for a particular audience. Some listeners may consider your use of strong adjectives or adverbs as 'cursing'. It is usually better to err on the side of respect and courtesy toward everyone that is listening.
Don't think you're cool when you swear. You're not. But don't think you're not cool when you don't swear.
Don't give up on not swearing if a swear word "slips out." Things happens.
It'll take some time but eventually you'll stop swearing; it takes patience. See if family or friends can help you by giving a lot of support to you for not cursing.

Warnings

Swearing can engender disrespect, hatred and violence. Stopping it will improve your relations with other people but continuing to communicate through swearing will dull your experience of life and potentially leads to misunderstandings that can end up in bad situations.
Swearing at work will get you fired unless your boss really, really liked that racist joke you just made.
Seek anger management through professionals if your swearing usually comes about because of anger, frustration or irrational thoughts; otherwise you may end up hurting yourself or others and you won't live the full life you deserve to.
Don't use swearing as a weapon - it only makes you look disobedient, ignorant, angry, rude, impatient, ill-tempered and difficult. This is especially important around authority figures like teachers, police, judges, bosses. Swearing gets you nowhere; manners open all doors.
Intense and relentless swearing is verbal abuse and in some jurisdictions can have you ending up in court for a fine or maybe even imprisonment.
If you have children, you must teach them that there are times when using swearing is inappropriate. If they are too young to understand 'inappropriate', then perhaps not swearing is the best way to prevent them from picking up your language and using it.
If someone annoys you and you tell them to "truck off" then people will probably laugh at you. Try to ignore them.

Things You'll Need

Patience
Sense of realism about your goal - it takes time to change
A swear jar for charity
Friends and family who are supportive
Journal for thoughts, goals and self-promises

source:
http://www.wikihow.com/Stop-Swearing

stars&straps · 05-27-2008, 12:46 PM

I swear alot.
i don't intend to stop either, i mean i try but fuck it. cant help it.

*Rocky* · 05-29-2008, 05:00 AM

dont fuck it my dear you got to learn how to do it.

The Wolf · 05-29-2008, 06:01 AM

I only curse on very rare occasions. I use words like "Freak" and "Crap" more. I'm not sure if you would considering that a form of cursing. Cursing to a nicer degree.

*Rocky* · 05-29-2008, 06:34 AM

if i needed to swear when i am angry i cusre the devil and his followers or may god curse the devil, i used words like shit and crap but i am leaving them.

DomGTR · 05-29-2008, 09:00 AM

Swear box
Pinch yourself, or get someone to pinch you every time you do

*Rocky* · 05-29-2008, 02:58 PM

i like dat ,or pay charty ha.

captain_kurenai · 05-29-2008, 03:41 PM

Ooh I did this for my psychology project. Man ... I paid up $1 for every time I swore.

When I finished I was swearing for every dollar that was handed back to me

Striker · 05-30-2008, 11:20 PM

I stoped my saelf by substituting words and now if just stoped but im camper now

BCalSays · 06-03-2008, 09:06 AM

this actually has some good tips, because i've been known to let a few slip, last weekend i was Tony in west side story, and i got reaally into the last scene where i scream for chino to come shoot me, and dropped the f bomb, it had a mixed reception.

BlockHead2111 · 06-04-2008, 05:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Rocky*

Swearing is a dangerous habit that leads to other outrageous behavioral problems.

Can I ask how the bloody hell swearing leads to outrageous behavioral problems? It doesn't trigger mental illnesses...

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Rocky*

Know why you want to stop swearing. This isn't trite - you really must want to stop the habit in order to challenge it.

Why would you need to stop? Unless your offend everyone you come across then there is no need to stop. Though admittedly you do say want there.

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Rocky*

Think about all the reasons why life will be better if you do stop.

To be honest I can't think of any... I'll look a complete prat using other random words, and look like a self-harming maniac if I pinch or punch myself. And you can say to get others to do it for you, but the pain makes ya swear more

Everyone swears sometimes. I don't see why people are still offended by it....

DamnImGood · 06-06-2008, 05:09 AM

There's nothing wrong with swearing; they're just words.