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Go Back   Teen Forums » Teen Life Forums » Friends and Family » Teen Pregnancy and Parental Support

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Old 01-06-2010, 05:43 AM   #1 (permalink)
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She's just told me she's pregnant

Ok so my girlfriend told me tonight that she's pregnant. We both knew there was a chance but tonight she took the test and it was positive. She wants to keep it but I think we won't be able to afford it and we won't cope.

The thing is, we already have one baby and she's only 6 months old so having another now is really soon. It wasn't like we weren't being careful. She had her drink spiked one night when she was out by some guy who then had sex with her. She even took the morning after pill but that didn't work. (Apparently it only 85% effective).

So she's against having an abortion and she knows that she wouldn't be able to give birth to it and then give it up for adoption so the only option left is to keep it. We can only just get by with one. I'm studying full time and she's either working, or in hospital, (she has to go in quite a bit for treatment) so having another now would run us off our feet. Also, we would need a bigger place to live and more money to pay for it all and as far as I can see, there's no way we'll cope.

I tried telling her this but she wouldn't accept it. I understand that she can't have an abortion or give it up for adoption but I really don't know what we're going to do.

Another thing:If we are having another baby, what do I tell my parents. My girlfriend doesn't want them to know what really happened so I need to make something up. Ideally something that won't make her sound like a slut. They know the baby won't be mine because we're currently long distance and they'll know we hadn't seen each other around the baby this baby was conceived.
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Old 01-09-2010, 02:18 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: She's just told me she's pregnant

wait? what? the kids not yours?
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Old 01-09-2010, 05:10 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: She's just told me she's pregnant

That's right. She had her drink spiked at a party.
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Old 01-09-2010, 05:28 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Re: She's just told me she's pregnant

After the spike I assume the sex was unwanted and thus was rape. If you do decide to keep the baby, have it dna tested for a possible match maybe against the sex offender database. Who knows, you may end up getting child support from that dickshit at the party.

Also if she was raped you may suggest to her to get tested for any STD's or stuff. Not saying its going to be the case, but better you find out now.
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Old 01-09-2010, 09:25 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Re: She's just told me she's pregnant

I agree. When this happened authorities should have been brought in this situation. Her rights were violated and someone needs to be punished.

I'm really not quite sure how you're raising a baby if you're long distance, that's quite confusing to me. If you had a baby, I'm pretty sure you'd wanna be closer to her.

But if you know you can't keep the baby then you really need to sit her down and talk to her about it. Having one baby at 19 would already be so much work. I can't even imagine. So I have no idea how much work two babies would be.

I understand that she doesn't want your mom to know, but sometimes it's better just to be honest. After all, they are your parents. They know what's good for you and they'd probably be willing to give you some good advice. I'd talk to them and be honest. Or if you can't talk to them, find an adult that you can confide in. Sometimes seeing the picture from their point of view, puts things in perspective.

Hope everything works out. Good luck.
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