it is entirely up to you, i think even though it is a first time love, we know if it is love, and not just a crush or something, it feels different, you feel like you will die if you cant see/hear the person you love, you would do anything for them etc etc. i was in your situation with my gf, she loved me, but i wasnt really sure if i loved her, i cared soo much for her, i told her i didnt really know how i felt, and i did wait a while, and i did fall in love, i think you need to make a decision for yourself whether to tell him or not, it will hurt him but reassure him on how much you do care for him, honesty in my opinion is always the best because everything comes out eventually and when it does its a huge ugly mess. i told my gf that i didnt know if i loved her, when she told me she loved me all i could do was smile and i know that really hurt her, but then i did fall in love, it takes the people in couples different times to fall in love, there is no point trying to force yourself into loving him because it just wont work out. i hope this helped.

I think you should be honest with him. Just because you don't love him now doesn't mean your feelings won't develop into love. When you love him, you'll know. I think it's just one of those feelings that happens and you can't really explain it, but you just know that's how you feel. There's no doubts or second guessing, when you really feel it. Of course, that's just what I think. Reassure him of the feelings that you know are there for you. Let him know how you do feel, but be honest with the fact that you're not sure what you really feel is love just yet. In my opinion, it's not right to tell someone you love them in order to spare their feelings. He should know how you really feel. And like I said, this doesn't necessarily mean you'll never love him. You want to be with him, so just give your feelings time to grow.

It's a completely understandable thing to do, after all, as kopite said, it likely would have hurt him if you didn't say it back, and it's just a reflex thing to do.

In my opinion, you should let him know because otherwise you're going to keep having to say it back and there's no use in you feeling uncomfortable about it every time it happens. Tell him you're really glad he loves you (if you are), and that you really care for him, but you aren't totally sure of what you feel yet or aren't ready to say it. If he really does love you, he should understand. And if you do end up falling in love, it will mean so much more when you tell him and you are sure.


I'm glad to see it means a lot to you, though. Couples seem to be so loosey-goosey with the "I love you" thing nowadays...

im with scaredycrow

Sounds like you did it out of reaction, don't beat yourself up about it.

If I were you I would break up with him. If you have to ask us to validate your feels or lack there of, you definitely aren't in love and should end it before he gets even more attached.

chances are, if you care about him and want to be with him, you love him. you can love someone, but not be WITH them might i add. like i said, you most likely love him. you shouldnt take "love" all too seriously, but by no means lightly. try to define what love really is to you. for example: to me, love is when someone elses happiness is more important than your own (short and simply that is, in fact, my definition).