My girlfriend is a cutter and she just started today. She told me after school and i was really upset. She is 12 and i am 13 and im really worring about her she is haveing problems with her friends and family but the worst is her family. Her mom has never married her dad an her mom hates her dad so she cant see him at all and thats why she started cutting herself and i really need help.:(
my gf is a cutter
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It's kind of a good thing you're getting help when she's just starting. It's better than her being years into the habit. The best advice I can give you is to be there for her. Tell her how she's making you feel when she does these things to her body, and offer her other ways to get rid of the pain she's feeling. She could try other relaxing things. Yoga, painting, writing, cooking. Something she enjoys to take her mind off of things. Reassure her that you're always a phone call away when she feels that urge to cut.
There's no way you can change the circumstances of her family, but you can be her shoulder to cry on. Good luck.
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Aggie wrote:
My girlfriend is a cutter and she just started today. She told me after school and i was really upset. She is 12 and i am 13 and im really worring about her she is haveing problems with her friends and family but the worst is her family. Her mom has never married her dad an her mom hates her dad so she cant see him at all and thats why she started cutting herself and i really need help.:(
I used to be a cutter too, and I started at that age.
The bad thing is she doesn't have a good support system she can rely family wise.
I think by saying, "tell her to get help" or "go see someone" that is shitty advice considering she is only 12, and if her parents aren't aware that it's a problem, then the point is moot.
From a personal standpoint, she needs your support, so stick by her no matter what. Encourage her that she doesn't need to do that to herself to be loved. Just stick by her no matter what. I know that having someone you care about can seem scary, and you just want to run away, but trust me, she needs you. No matter how bad it gets, stay with her, encourage her, and eventually it should subside. -
Aggie wrote:
My girlfriend is a cutter and she just started today. She told me after school and i was really upset. She is 12 and i am 13 and im really worring about her she is haveing problems with her friends and family but the worst is her family. Her mom has never married her dad an her mom hates her dad so she cant see him at all and thats why she started cutting herself and i really need help.:(
be there for her when she needs it, and let her know shes not alone, she will always have someone there to help her when she needs it.
If the problem stems from her family, maybe she should tell her mom how that situation makes her feel?[SIGPIC]http://www.thecommonage.net/mandala.gif[/SIGPIC]
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Like everyone said, be there for her and give her a reason not to cut. If you treat her well and are a great boyfriend for her, she'll have the mindset that there is someone out there who cares about her and can give her guidance, rather than having to resort to cutting to make herself feel better. I think it's good that you told her to call you or text you when she wants to cut. My girlfriend used to have the same issue and she would just think of me and how happy I made her when she wanted to cut. That's why I emphasize treating her well. You can be a long-term solution to the problem by being someone who will care for her through her struggles; that is much better than the short-term solution of cutting.Golden Enterprises, Inc. - CEO
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You need to let someone know if this continues, because I'm a long-term cutter, I started in fifth grade and I'm now in tenth, and I'm still struggling with relapses. If she continues, tell her mom.
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