I signed up for some cultural retreat that sounded interesting to me with some of my friends in Anime club. (more like half of the anime club -__- they’re really active people on campus).
Anyway the retreat wasn’t what I expected, it was more of a self help kinda retreat where we talked more about personal beliefs and issues we’ve gone through.
Well anyway we were put into small groups to talk about more personal things then you would in a big group. My group leader happened to be one of the anime club advisors.
At first I didn’t even try to contribute to the conversation feeling completely out of place, but by the second day that had changed. I had learned so much about everyone else and felt kind of bad because I hadn’t really shared anything myself.
But the problem was, I didn’t know how to feel. I couldn’t find the right words, expressions, or anything to express how I felt, because I didn’t know and I wasn’t sure how I was suppose to feel. So when ever it was my turn to share I’d say it was whatever or Im indifferent.
So Mark (my small group leader) saw that I was struggling and offered to be there for advice anytime for me even after the retreat. Which I thought was really nice, I could tell he really cared and I had seen him help my other group members out.
Its been a few months since the retreat. And he knows how hard it is for me to go up to people and be open, but he still checks up on me to see if Im having fun or feel welcomed.
I really want to take him up on his offer and talk to him, but something is stopping me.
Why can’t I open up to him?
Anyway the retreat wasn’t what I expected, it was more of a self help kinda retreat where we talked more about personal beliefs and issues we’ve gone through.
Well anyway we were put into small groups to talk about more personal things then you would in a big group. My group leader happened to be one of the anime club advisors.
At first I didn’t even try to contribute to the conversation feeling completely out of place, but by the second day that had changed. I had learned so much about everyone else and felt kind of bad because I hadn’t really shared anything myself.
But the problem was, I didn’t know how to feel. I couldn’t find the right words, expressions, or anything to express how I felt, because I didn’t know and I wasn’t sure how I was suppose to feel. So when ever it was my turn to share I’d say it was whatever or Im indifferent.
So Mark (my small group leader) saw that I was struggling and offered to be there for advice anytime for me even after the retreat. Which I thought was really nice, I could tell he really cared and I had seen him help my other group members out.
Its been a few months since the retreat. And he knows how hard it is for me to go up to people and be open, but he still checks up on me to see if Im having fun or feel welcomed.
I really want to take him up on his offer and talk to him, but something is stopping me.
Why can’t I open up to him?
"Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not after you."
