Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

    • Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

      Hey guys/girls:

      I need help determining my best bro's sexuality. Him and I have been best friends since 4th grade all the way through now (freshmen in HS). I've known that I've liked him since I realized that I wasn't straight, back in around 7th grade. He is genuinely the greatest guy I've ever met, and I want to be with him so bad I can't put it into words.

      This is not something that I have worked up in my head. I honestly think that he might be bi/gay underneath it all. I actually have stories to back up my thoughts:

      1. Remember back in 7th grade when calling each other gay was funny? Long story short, I ended up calling him gay, as he was doing badly at CoD. He then proceeded to say "oh yeah" in a joking tone and began to massage my inner thigh and penis. I told him to stop after a couple of seconds, and it hasn't been mentioned since.

      2. His mom has like OCD about going to church early on Sunday. I wouldn't get off the couch to walk him out, so he told me he'd bounce on my balls if I didn't get up. Sure enough, he got on my couch, put his foot on my dick, and started going up and down. We just sat and smiled at each other for 20 seconds until he stopped. I got up, walked him out, and it was never mentioned again.

      He also offered to lick my knee scar for $10 last week, but I think he was just being stupid.

      There have been countless other mini-things that have happened similar to the ones above. I confided in a couple of my friends about it, and they all agree that he could very well be gay. I also recieved a couple of stories from his gym wrestling partner, who said that he tried way too hard in wrestling and would occasionally try to "grab" him.

      I really need help on figuring out exactly what is going on. On the outside, he's a loudmouth, raunchy, jock (like most guys) but when he's just with me, he's softer, more playful, and more creative.

      Opinions? Thoughts? HELP!

      Note: He does not know I'm gay.

      -Kamens
    • Re: Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

      Haha I'm in about the same situation as you except I'm a senior in highschool. Believe it or not my best friend and I often go farther than your stories (handjobs etc) but he claims to be 100% straight. He now finally knows I'm bi with a thing for him but says he is straight. Personally I think he's deeply closeted, but he'll never admit it. You never know, he could be curious, but ultimately it's up to him because he may never admit it to himself. Also, be careful and don't read too much into things because you like him- I've made that mistake before. Just test his limits and eventually you may only get an answer by coming out to him
    • Re: Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

      In what ways has he disproved that he might not be gay?

      All you've said were points where he was acting gay and what not, but has he ever become taken aback by any of your forward movements?

      I liked my best friend before. And it was the happiest I had been, and my first love in this life. Things didn't happen or turn out so well. We weren't compatible on that level. She loves differently than I, but all in all we're superb friends.

      What I'm getting at is...maybe it's not true love (maybe it is..) but it's just testing limits. Discovering trust and comfort and security. The bounds of friendship. On one hand, you could be a giving person when in love, always there. But he might need his distance, and need not to be bothered with too much emotional stuff.

      Just be open about it really.
    • Re: Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

      Yeah I was in the same situation once. But I decided to be forward with it one day and told him I was gay then I told him if he wanted something to happen between us just call me and we can talk or if he didn't want to be friends anymore at all then tell me. But with me it turned out alright because my best friend turned into my boyfriend. So you can do it the way I did it or you can try some other way such as being a little flirty with him and sit really close to him and things like and see if he responds to these advances if he does then you have a great chance that something can come out of this.

      I hope I helped you. I also that something becomes better from your friend.
    • Re: Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

      Dude, just tell him your gay. Bring up chicks/guys in a conversation. Change your interested in on facebook. I think the whole sexual stuff he did with you was probably him joking around and being a twat, but hey-hoo, I don't really know. But go for it, you never know.
      [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    • Re: Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

      Kamens wrote:

      Remember back in 7th grade when calling each other gay was funny?


      Not really. I was never one to insult any particular group (except the Twitards).

      Kamens wrote:

      Long story short, I ended up calling him gay, as he was doing badly at CoD.


      Which Call of Duty?

      Kamens wrote:

      He then proceeded to say "oh yeah" in a joking tone and began to massage my inner thigh and penis. I told him to stop after a couple of seconds, and it hasn't been mentioned since.


      Kamens wrote:


      2. His mom has like OCD about going to church early on Sunday. I wouldn't get off the couch to walk him out, so he told me he'd bounce on my balls if I didn't get up. Sure enough, he got on my couch, put his foot on my dick, and started going up and down. We just sat and smiled at each other for 20 seconds until he stopped. I got up, walked him out, and it was never mentioned again


      Pics or it never happened.

      Okay, I'll be serious now.

      He might be gay or bisexual, but we can't tell you. There are a lot of straight people that act gay. The only sure way to know is to ask him. Alternatively, try coming out to him. For all you know, he might be interested in you. ;)
    • Re: Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

      Dude the best part of this post was def the knee scar, haha. And that you submitted it as proof (kinda). Anyway, you guys have been best friends for like 5 years. You've got to have more to go on than like 2-3 freaking tiny occurrences. Does he have a vibe? Has he said anything? You've got to know him better than this.
      [COLOR="black"]When I'm not fighting mountain lions for sport, I read about broken homes, teenage depression, and other such life-improving awesomeness cause I'm weird like that[/COLOR]
    • Re: Need Help Determining My Best Friend's Sexuality

      adamalv1215 wrote:

      Dude the best part of this post was def the knee scar, haha. And that you submitted it as proof (kinda). Anyway, you guys have been best friends for like 5 years. You've got to have more to go on than like 2-3 freaking tiny occurrences. Does he have a vibe? Has he said anything? You've got to know him better than this.


      I've had a bit of a vibe even before I realized that I had any feelings for him.

      Anyways, this thread is more or less useless now. He's turned into an ass since I last posted; long story short, popularity got the best of him. We still hang out a lot, but it's not the same unless we're alone or with Ben (our other close friend). He ignores me when he's around anyone else, especially the "in" crowd (which is weird cause I'm friends with a good chunk of them). The kid's still hot as balls, but nothing too serious could ever happen. Maybe mess around a bit :rolleyes: