Not sure what to do about my feelings...

    • Not sure what to do about my feelings...

      So I am a 16 yr old girl and I've only had two boyfriends and I've only been sexually involved with one of them, however it went no farther than third base - I'm still a virgin. I've really been wanting to have some fun lately and I kind of want to lose my virginity, even if I'm not in a serious relationship. I've always said I want to wait until marriage, but that doesn't matter as much to me anymore. I want to lose it, but only to a friend who I completely trust, you know? The problem is that I'm very religious - Roman Catholic - so I've been raised to know that sex before marriage is a sin, but I can't get my mind off of it. What am I supposed to do? If I have sex with this friend of mine, I'll be breaking every rule in my religion and in my family. I also don't want to get pregnant and I can't ask my parents to get me started on birth control and I know that condoms break. What am I supposed to do? I have no clue what to do anymore because it's such a complicated decision. Can anyone help me?
    • Re: Not sure what to do about my feelings...

      The whole sex before marriage = sin thing was written back in the days before contraception, and when marriage was about money and producing an heir...

      Today marriage is about love, so if sex happens between two people who love each other then it's hardly a sin...
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    • Re: Not sure what to do about my feelings...

      The only thing that I can say is that if you want to do something it should be between you and yourself. I am in the same situation as you, and I had the chance to to study abroad for two years with so many opportunities to do anything I want.......and I didn't, by the end of my 18years old I did lose my verginity. However now, its harder, because I'm getting horny all the time, a lot! And now I'm heading to college next year ( abroad ) and what I am sure about is that, If I am going to do it, I'll do it for me, and I'll do it knowing that I won't regret it, because that is the most important thing. Doing it without regretting it.
      I'm from a muslim religion, but I am not wearing the veil. If I want to do it and I am sure I won't regret it, I'll do it. Because, u can't just be having second thoughts while having SEX! When I was abroad, I said NO for about 4 times, I was nearly gonna have sex, and now I'm sure I did the right thing but just because I feel good about it. And more you grow up, MORE ull know what to do, especially to know if you are 100 per cent sure about it.
    • Re: Not sure what to do about my feelings...

      TheChristianHippie wrote:

      The whole sex before marriage = sin thing was written back in the days before contraception, and when marriage was about money and producing an heir...

      Today marriage is about love, so if sex happens between two people who love each other then it's hardly a sin...


      Why is it that every time I read a post by you, your avatar's first impression to me is a penis? --
    • Re: Not sure what to do about my feelings...

      Citky wrote:

      If you have any doubts about it, don't do it. You're 16 after all.


      Definitely agree with Citky. As you are probably well aware, you are in puberty and your hormones are flaring, which is what causes all of these uncertainties in your behavior and thinking. Be patient and don't do something that you'll regret, especially if something unexpected happens.
    • Re: Not sure what to do about my feelings...

      If your second guessing ur self even just a little you should wait till ur 100% sure of this decision.... i know it doesnt seem like losing ur virginity is a big deal but it is and u want ur first time to b perfect with no dark shadows or regets... in my opion i think u should wait it out a little longer like its been said before ur hormones are raggin and everything is all mixed up.. just simmer down for a bit lol
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