what's acceptable and when?

    • what's acceptable and when?

      Parents. They decide what you can do and when you can do it. How old should you be to experience the following things?: -sleeping over a boyfriend/girlfriend's house
      -going on a weekend vacation with friends
      -having a job that involves working late at night
      until early the next morning
      -going places without having to ask your parents
      if you can go
      -staying out without a curfew

      i'm almost 19, and i personally have a curfew. i have to be home by 11:30 every night. and i can't do any of these things. i think that by my age, teenagers should have more control over their own lives in order to prepare them for the future when their parents aren't around.

      what do you think?
    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      At 19 none of these restrictions should really be placed on you, though I guess it really depends on the individual. Have you shown in the past you can't be trusted?
      "I've never understood ethnic or national pride, because to me pride should be reserved for something you achieve or attain on your own, not something that happens by accident of birth."
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      Striker88;1062839033 wrote:

      You know why nobody has gotten evidence? God hasn't allowed that and won't.
    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      missfaerie3 wrote:

      My younger sister's 16 and she does all that stuff and my mom has no idea. She had a pregnancy scare last month.

      Yeah sorry about that.
      "I've never understood ethnic or national pride, because to me pride should be reserved for something you achieve or attain on your own, not something that happens by accident of birth."
      - George Carlin

      Striker88;1062839033 wrote:

      You know why nobody has gotten evidence? God hasn't allowed that and won't.
    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      I can do all those things if I want to and I'm 18
      only for that working late they would pick me up since my mom doesnt want me to walk alone to home at night and such. but if Im not alone that wouldnt matter.

      Think its bit stupid yes
      [CENTER]It's the missing that will kill you,
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    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      defenitely not all parents, but most, have a border line god complex; they feel they know whats best for their kid, without realising that they are confusing their own interests with the interests of their child. wait, your 18? your an emancipated youth, buddy(assuming 18 is not the legal age in your location. you actually became an emancipated youth at 16).

      off topic, an older guy that i know who is a server at the local pub, had his life destroyed by his parents. they didn't let him socialize with anyone until he was 16 (he was home schooled), but, unfortunately, by the time he got out to socialize, his socialization skills were retarded by 10 years. he is now a social outkast, not by choice, but because he cannot recover from the damage his parents did to him. however, ignorant adults will ALWAYS play the "age is wisdom" card, which is absolute poop. i know many adults that are children by their own standards.
      [FONT="Arial Black"][COLOR="Indigo"][CENTER]&&Do What Thou Wilt&&[/CENTER][/COLOR][/FONT]
    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      My mom is an authoritarian. She sets the rules "because she said so". I wouldn't have any of the limitations that I have now if I were in a four-year college, and I think that's why she's sheltering me. I think she wants to hold onto what's left of my childhood or something.

      What would someone like me do to get that freedom?
    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      I guess its debatable. Do I think they should let go of the reigns some more... sure. Honestly, if you're living under their roof...ehh, not much you can do about it.

      If i had to put my foot down on one of them, it would be the work hours. You need to be able to make a living for yourself so you can strike out on your own... that's the battle I would focus on now.
      "Nothing ruins the taste of peanut butter like unrequited love" - Charlie Brown
    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      It all depends on the parents, I guess, and their personal beliefs. Personally I think anyone over 18 should be able to do all those things they aren't allowing you to do. But if you're living under their roof you pretty much do whatever they tell you to.

      My advice is, get the fuck out of there.
      Hope is like a butterfly, it can be killed with one quick movement.
    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      I'm going to give separate opinions for each of the things the OP listed from first to last.

      1. If a 16 year old wishes to stay the night at a boyfriend or girlfriend's house (or even quite simply with a friend of the opposite sex.) I would not see a problem with that. The one reason every parent is so hesitant of allowing this is because of the fear of their child engaging in sexual acts. Why are we so afraid of sex anyway? Just teach your children about safe sex: talk to your daughter about birth control and your son about condoms. It's that simple. Teens will have sex whether or not you let them sleep over anyway.

      2. 16. As long as their not going to another country, I wouldn't see a problem.

      3. Fuck, if I had a son and he was 16 years old I would praise him greatly for wanting a job that had overnight hours such as those.

      4. 18. I do think that parents have a right to know where there child is going until they hit the magical age of 18.

      5. 16. Since they can drive by now, why restrict them like that?

      Post was edited 1 time, last by gman4354 ().

    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      I think 19 with a curfew is a bit much. You're a young adult. You should talk to them. Have you ever given them any reason to be so strict on curfew times?

      I think it depends on the person alone. I know plenty of my friends who are aged 18-19 all 'appear' to be mature and stuff...but they're complete idiots given the opportunity (I still love them ;) ). I think if most their parents didn't keep close tabs on them, most of them would be in a lot of trouble. But most of the time, it's "where are you going, who will you be with, call me in the morning," not, "be home for this exact time, etc. etc.".
      [FONT="Palatino Linotype"][COLOR="Silver"][SIZE="2"][CENTER][SIZE="2"] Growing old is inevitable. Growing up is optional! [/SIZE][/CENTER][/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT]
    • Re: what's acceptable and when?

      If in the past you have showed that you can't be trusted in certain situations. and if you broke their trust in a significant way, then they are probably right to restrict you.

      However, that being said you are legally an adult. You don't have to do what they say, but still listen and be respectful about it. And then come to your own conclusion.
      "Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.” - George Bernard Shaw
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