cutting myself

    • cutting myself

      So my girlfriend left me about 2 weeks ago. I found myself cutting my arm one night after i was using a craft knife to cut selotape (i was bored). I found it verry distracting and kept doing it. I then noticed that people will probably see and think im wierd so i stopped.
      So earlier today i then notice a picture of my ex with a bunch of boys and them all touching her (As a joke), but it really pissed me off. Without thinking i just started cutting my arm again.

      Now i feel stupid. I went to see my ex earlier to talk and she saw the cuts i made about 2 weeks ago. she looked at me and asked how i cut my arm. I said "oh, i cut cut it on accident". But its blatently obviose i didnt because of how it looked... I have also seen people stare at my arm, but that might be me being pariniod.

      Now, is it normal that i feel satisfied by cutting myself?
      it hurts sometimes, but it sort of takes my mind away from everything. Its not like im so depressed i just sit here cutting myself all day. Its more like 1 cut and then i leave it for a while, or some nights i would just do it so that the feeling would take my mind away from everything when i was sleeping.

      As much as i wish i had a proper question i dont. I guess its just one of those things i want to speak about, but i cant exactly go telling everyone.
    • Re: cutting myself

      Better talk with someone about it and DONT do it again, you have no idea what you get started with. I understand what you mean ant trust me your not getting anywhere with doing that.

      Or either you find someone to talk about it or you need some other kind of distraction like inded said as music, movies, games or do something with friends.
      [CENTER]It's the missing that will kill you,
      knowing you've missed your shot.
      ☆[/CENTER]
    • Re: cutting myself

      I would always use music to help before, but its not really working this time. Too many memories of my ex talking to me about music and stuff and lyrics reminding me of life.
      Movies are sort of working, but im watching about 4 or 5 a day at the moment and its getting boring...
      Tried going out with friends. That helped the first time, but then i became sick this week and couldnt :mad:


      Guess il just stop. Its not doing anything for me and i dont want it to lead to anything else.
      The hard part is that i usually keep a knife by me, for some reason. Its just a habit ive been doing for years. I guess il have to stop doing that if i dont want to end up doing it again.

      Thanks :)
    • Re: cutting myself

      Just find something else to do then that you might like anything at all :)
      and ofcourse if there are problems, the best way is to talk it out with someone.

      And good that you will stop, that will be better ofcourse :)
      Maybe you just had the knife with you for protection or something?, its okay as long as you dont hurt yourself with it ofcourse. If you think you will then better leave it somewhere else for some time :)

      Hope it helped a bit, can always pm me too if needed.
      [CENTER]It's the missing that will kill you,
      knowing you've missed your shot.
      ☆[/CENTER]
    • Re: cutting myself

      Ah yeah. Habits are annoying. I've been biting my fingers when I'm nervous/anxious, for years. I've improved, but it is taking ages to get out of the habit. I have told everyone I know to hit me in the face if they see me doing it. But it's mostly on my own that I do it.

      While you're sick, you could do housework. Anything to keep you busy, eh? And some exercise. Might go for a run myself, actually..

      Post was edited 3 times, last by cool_walking_ ().

    • Re: cutting myself

      Thanks everyone :)
      The habit of having a knife around me actually came from when i was a kid and i used it to cut fruit. I then sort of took it everywhere when i was 13 as we would all play in the forests and i would use it to sharpen sticks and stuff.
      I stopped taking it out with my now, but its just always at the side of my bed, or on my desk and i usually just fuss with it when im bored.

      Im going away on holiday tomorrow, so il be kept busy.
    • Re: cutting myself

      I have a best friend that used to cut her self quite a lot to the point where, even with a long sleeved shirt on, you could see the cuts. I, and a lot of other people managed to persuade her out of it. Myself, I would never cut and I know it seems like ''oh he's just saying that and he doesn't know what it's like'' but honesly, I do. I've had a lot going on in my life recently and in the past, but I always keep it inside and would never let anybody know what was going on. So, when I was alone in the house or someone had really angered me, I would just walk away and rant about it to myself, and I would talk everything over with myself, and I would heal it myself. Nobody else knew, hope this helped.
    • Re: cutting myself

      Elliiot wrote:

      I have a best friend that used to cut her self quite a lot to the point where, even with a long sleeved shirt on, you could see the cuts. I, and a lot of other people managed to persuade her out of it. Myself, I would never cut and I know it seems like ''oh he's just saying that and he doesn't know what it's like'' but honesly, I do. I've had a lot going on in my life recently and in the past, but I always keep it inside and would never let anybody know what was going on. So, when I was alone in the house or someone had really angered me, I would just walk away and rant about it to myself, and I would talk everything over with myself, and I would heal it myself. Nobody else knew, hope this helped.


      Well its good that you can talk yourself out of it and can handle it on your own ofcourse but a lot of people really need to talk with someone else to get over those problems they have and if they wont do it they sometimes will do stupid things cause they think it would help but ofcourse it doesnt at all.
      Some just need a bit of understanding and support from others to get through.
      [CENTER]It's the missing that will kill you,
      knowing you've missed your shot.
      ☆[/CENTER]
    • Re: cutting myself

      Most cutters get that satisfaction feeling, I know you say you don't do it that often but you're still classed as a cutter haha.

      But you should REALLY try and stop now before it gets out of hand.
      This is how it always starts .. and then they just get more extreme and more frequently.
      I urge you to try stop now :(

      As your for your ex thing, meh .. there's a reason why she's your ex. Don't let that bother you. :)

      I'm always around if you need a chat!
      Now that i've chose to become a pal, a sister and adviser, there's no body wiser.

      :hugs: <-- because these make the world go round ;)
    • Re: cutting myself

      Thanks. Usually i would talk about stuff when something is bothering me, but i would always talk to my ex, so no hope there.
      The cutting started because i started smashing things in my room and realised that was stupid and the cutting kind of took over that.

      I think its just something that will take time to sort out though.
    • Re: cutting myself

      Yeah it's normal to feel satisfaction. There are certain coping mechanisms people use when they're under a lot of stress, and self harm is one of the...well, harmful ones.
      For me, at least, it helps to recognize WHY I'm doing it. For me, it was kind of a way to transfer emotional pain into something easier to deal with: physical pain. For other people, it's frustration, displaced anger, attention, control, self-hate, distraction, or they feel numb all the time and tend to think that feeling pain is better than feeling nothing at all.
      Anyway, once you recognize why, it's easier to find a better way to deal. I mean, like read a book, watch a movie, write (rants, stories, novels, poetry, journals), listen to/play music, post advice stuff on here or yahoo answers. Other people exercise, or talk to friends, vent. All kinds of stuff.
    • Re: cutting myself

      Everythings sorted now. Went away on holiday for another week and felt like cutting myself for the first few days. It was a strange feeling wanting to cut myself, felt like if i was to do it everything would be better.
      Anyway by the end of the week i didnt even feel the need to anymore, so its all good now :) Helped that i started talking to people again and have been spending a lot of time on my motorbike, which i find helps as im too busy riding to think about anything else.

      Stupid me told my ex for some reason :nono: She then told my friends, who where all suspicouse when i was wearing along sleeve shirt. I swear having your friends tell you to roll up your sleeves is scary. Im just glad i was cutting on my outside part of my arm below my elbow, so they didnt notice when i showed them my wrists (part of the reason i did that)...
    • Re: cutting myself

      dev532 wrote:

      Everythings sorted now. Went away on holiday for another week and felt like cutting myself for the first few days. It was a strange feeling wanting to cut myself, felt like if i was to do it everything would be better.
      Anyway by the end of the week i didnt even feel the need to anymore, so its all good now :) Helped that i started talking to people again and have been spending a lot of time on my motorbike, which i find helps as im too busy riding to think about anything else.

      Stupid me told my ex for some reason :nono: She then told my friends, who where all suspicouse when i was wearing along sleeve shirt. I swear having your friends tell you to roll up your sleeves is scary. Im just glad i was cutting on my outside part of my arm below my elbow, so they didnt notice when i showed them my wrists (part of the reason i did that)...


      Well good that everythings better now and that your talking to people, keep that up :)
      And ye just be carefull what you say to someone as you see you never know who you can trust.
      [CENTER]It's the missing that will kill you,
      knowing you've missed your shot.
      &#9734;[/CENTER]