I need help!

    • I need help!

      Hello!!! I am a 14-year-old boy named Nick. I am from Athens, Greece.
      I need some help! Both at school and summer camp, everybody has a girlfriend except me. (I am NOT gay!!) I blame my weight (77kg/169 pounds) and my image generally!!
      I am quite tall for my age (1.77) but I believe I am really ugly! Please help!! I need a workout, a nutriton plan, tips about girls, motivation, everything would help!!!
      Thank you in advance, Nick
    • Re: I need help!

      Here's my advice. You're 14, stay away from girls for now. I'm 14, too. Now, granted, the girls in my area I'm sure are a bit different, but in my area, none of the girls are worth the attention they get. They're all into Jersey Shore and SWAG and YOLO. It just needs to stop. At 14, no relationship works out. You'll date for about 2 or 3 weeks before realizing how boring and pointless it is and break up. I've been in high school for about two weeks now, and yet I've already seen about 20 relationships end since then. It just never works out. Not having a girlfriend isn't something to worry about or stress over. I'll use the classic saying to describe your case. "If everyone else jumped off a cliff, would you?"

      Your school has how many boys total? And EVERY one of them has a girlfriend? Really? No matter how you look at it, you're never alone. There's always someone else like you.

      Want a workout plan? That's perfectly fine, but please don't change everything about you just to get a girlfriend. It's not worth it. You'll work for months to improve your image, go out with a girl for a few weeks, and when it's over, you just wasted months for nothing. Play any sports? It's a great way to lose weight. I lost a ton of weight playing basketball outside with my dad. Do yourself a favor, don't worry about a diet. It honestly doesn't make much of a difference. Cut out a little fatty foods, and eat some more salad if you're really serious about it. It's great for you, but don't go overboard. My cousin went full vegetarian once and was making herself sick because of changing her diet so drastically.

      For tips about girls, take a look through the romance sections of this forum, actually quite informational. Here are some quickfire tips that I came up with in 5 seconds off the top of my head. Never ask a girl her weight. Do anything a girl tells you, even if it's as simple as "wear orange to school" (yeah, a girl asked me to do that before). Don't be afraid to talk to them. Notice their feelings (even though it will seem impossible, try to recognize every face she makes and connect it with what she's feeling). And finally, move at the right pace (move fast enough so she won't be bored, but not too fast that you scare her off).

      As for motivation, well that's up to you. :D
    • Re: I need help!

      Your 14, you have barely lived life yet. Take a breathe, I know a relationship may seem the most important thing right now, but its not. I bet a ton of girls at your school are whores, aka sluts in a way. The relationship will be pointless. Focus on school, focus on your life before worrying about girls.

      Weight, okay, do you play sports? Great way to loose weight. Go healthy, have a salad sandwich, no white bread, grain bread is better, a healthy diet is a good way to cut off the fat. Have a treat once in a while though.

      Tips about girls, I have no idea what kinds you want, listen to the dude up there^^
      [COLOR="Black"][FONT="Courier New"][SIZE="4"]"The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase; if you pursue happiness you'll never find it."[/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR]
    • Re: I need help!

      a) Not everybody has a girlfriend. I can almost *almost* guarantee that.

      b) If you want to workout, start with cardio. Abs are a good idea too; if you're starting, you should start simple and do some crunches.

      c) Tips about girls: Don't be too desperate. Be yourself. If you get attached and needy, that's a major turnoff to girls as well.

      d) Dress better. Always helps. If I had to guess, you could probably go down a clothing size (the average male wears clothes 1-2 sizes too large).

      e) Don't worry about it! You're a teenager, have fun. This is the time to make mistakes and screw up and enjoy life!
    • Re: I need help!

      Hi Nick,

      Just because everyone else has a girlfriend doesn't mean that you need one too. You shouldn't really be focusing on girls right now. Honestly, they can be a handful (and this is coming from a girl). Your first problem is when you stated that you think you're really ugly. That's definitely not the attitude to have if you indeed intend on getting a girlfriend.

      You have to confident in yourself. Girls like guys who are confident. If you think you're ugly, then you'll carry yourself like you're ugly and then no girl will want you. You could look like Smiggles from Lord of the Rings, but if you carry yourself like you're the finest thing walking this Earth, you'll have a much better shot at getting a girlfriend.

      You're 14 years old which means you're still going through puberty. Everyone goes through it. Your body is going through some unexpected changes right now. According to your dimensions, you're tall and you have some weight to you. Not sure if you're overweight or not because your weight can contribute to muscle mass.

      Everyone is different and nothing is wrong with you. My suggestion is that you start gaining more confidence in your self. You also have to deal with your insecurity with your looks. I know some guys out there who aren't the hottest thing smoking, but they pull girls every day. Confidence is everything and you need to work on that, not only for girls, but for life in general. It will take you a long way.
    • Re: I need help!

      Hi Nick. At age 14, it is unlikely that these 'relationships' mean anything. A lot of them will last for a matter of weeks and when a real relationship comes along, possibly not until your 20's, they will realise that they were not important.

      If you want to improve on anything right now it's your self esteem, because you are not ugly and I'm sure you don't need to lose weight. You definitely shouldn't be changing yourself just to impress people. 14 year old girls for the most part are hormonal and bitchy. You might think they'll make you happy, but actually they might just end up doing the polar opposite. I know. I used to be one :lol:

      You were right about needing motivation. It should be the motivation to believe in yourself and be the best you can be.
    • Re: I need help!

      You're only 14, dont worry about girls right now, they're really not worth the heartache, especially at that age. Even if all your friends have "girlfriends", i'm sure they wont last long, you'll see them break up within a couple weeks or months. As for tips? Just be yourself, i know thats the most common tip anyone could give you, but its the truth, what's the point of acting differently when you want to spend the rest of your life with someone? They should like you for who you are, not what you're pretending to be.

      The weight issue might go away with age, you'll be getting taller and might thin out, but from now until then, just dont eat a lot of fast food and stay away from too much sugary things. Eat at least 2 meals a day, and dont over-eat, for example: if you have ice cream in the house only have some 2-3 days a week instead of 5-7 days. You just have to limit yourself without cutting out things completely, or the cravings will make you go crazy.

      As for motivation, theres not much i can say there, you have to motivate yourself, how much do you want to lose weight? It takes a lot of time and a lot of effort, and you cant just lose 20 pounds over night. Good luck though, and like i said, dont worry about girls right now, they arent worth the time at such a young age.