Convincing parents I'm responsible.

    • Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      So, I'll start off with the full story, so you can know whats happening.
      I have really good friends living in Germany, and they visited Canada to see me this week. We started talking and I very much want to go to Germany this December to see them. I would be going by myself and staying at my friends house in Cologne.
      I talked to my parents and they were seriously considering it, but then another problem arose.
      I have missed quite a few classes in school (like, about 18, which is bad) and they think I skipped them. Truth is, and they know this, that I have been sick for a lot of those (I got bronchitis, it really sucked) and haven't been at school. Now I have skipped about four classes and they know this too, and so the school phoned them.
      They've kind of lost a lot of trust in me and don't think now that I am responsible enough to go to Germany alone. Of course, I feel very ashamed and mad at my self for ruining this opportunity by doing something so petty as skipping, but it's too late now. I do consider myself quite responsible in most things, but like a kid my age (16) I do get carried away with things.
      Anyways, how do you guys think I could go about earning their trust back and proving I am responsible, and what do you guys think are some good reasons why I should be allowed to travel.
      Thanks a lot.
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      I think the best way to show (take it from someone who knows from a lot of experience, you can talk all you want, but until you show them, it won't mean anything) them you're responsible is to not miss anymore class, or skip it for that matter. Do really good on homework and tests, maybe bring your grades up a bit, do some extra credit, help out around the house, volunteer for crappy household chores, offer to make dinner, etc.



      All good things are wild, and free.
      -Henry David Thoreau
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      Bhenji wrote:

      Yeah, that's what I was thinking, but you see I would be going in December, only a month and a half away. I'm afraid I might not be able to convince them in time...


      Thats a risk you have to be willing to take then. There's only so much you can do to change their mind. If their mind is already made up, then odds are its not going to change.



      All good things are wild, and free.
      -Henry David Thoreau
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      Do what Linda said and if they still don't let you go don't just say fuck it and quit doing it, because then you will just be in the same boat the next time you want to do something. Also, who will be paying for you to get there?
      Look at yourself in the mirror and tell me what a man is without pride, tell me what a man is without fire in his eyes.
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      YO_VANILLA wrote:

      Do what Linda said and if they still don't let you go don't just say fuck it and quit doing it, because then you will just be in the same boat the next time you want to do something. Also, who will be paying for you to get there?


      Yeah, I'm just trying to do good in school and stuff like that. And they'll be paying for the flight, but I'll be paying for the expenses.
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      I have pretty much the same situation as you. I have wanted to visit my long distance girlfriend at England for some time now, but my parents don't think it's a good idea to let a 16-year old alone there. I would have no problem with someone else coming with me otherwise, but that would more costly. And they are right, i am not that mature even. And i too have performed really suckily in school. But the best way to convince them if probably what Linda already said. And yeah, acting immature is the probably the worst move, so be careful not to seem like that. I am 17 years old soon, so hopefully my parents will let me go alone, but i will just have to step up and do my work better, and maybe they will. I wish you luck. :D
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      Samppa wrote:

      I have pretty much the same situation as you. I have wanted to visit my long distance girlfriend at England for some time now, but my parents don't think it's a good idea to let a 16-year old alone there. I would have no problem with someone else coming with me otherwise, but that would more costly. And they are right, i am not that mature even. And i too have performed really suckily in school. But the best way to convince them if probably what Linda already said. And yeah, acting immature is the probably the worst move, so be careful not to seem like that. I am 17 years old soon, so hopefully my parents will let me go alone, but i will just have to step up and do my work better, and maybe they will. I wish you luck. :D


      Know how you feel. My parents know I'm mature, they just want to be completely convince I'm not going to get myself killed or something (even though they know I can handle myself). I'm actually getting decent grades at the moment, it was just that I had missed a lot of classes (not from skipping, personal problems) and the school phoned home, so my parents got pissed. I think they are probably over it now though, it's not something that they'll hold on to.
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      Please don't skip classes. It's your own education that you're throwing down the drain and there are so many children who really would love the opportunity to get educated and receive recognised qualifications so they have more of a chance of getting somewhere in life.
      However, I think skipping classes, although bad, shouldn't affect their opinions of your going to Germany. It's something you want to do so you're hardly going to fuck that up for yourself. If you went out, hung with the wrong crowd and did something bad, then I'd understand because they may think you're going to do that in Germany and get into trouble.
      Maybe just apologise, remind them that you were honest about it and offer to do a trial month or something where you do not skip any classes at all (and you continue to do so). That should make them feel a bit more confident about you going :)
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    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      Hann. wrote:

      Gosh, you're obsessed and sad.

      Please don't skip classes. It's your own education that you're throwing down the drain and there are so many children who really would love the opportunity to get educated and receive recognised qualifications so they have more of a chance of getting somewhere in life.
      However, I think skipping classes, although bad, shouldn't affect their opinions of your going to Germany. It's something you want to do so you're hardly going to fuck that up for yourself. If you went out, hung with the wrong crowd and did something bad, then I'd understand because they may think you're going to do that in Germany and get into trouble.
      Maybe just apologise, remind them that you were honest about it and offer to do a trial month or something where you do not skip any classes at all (and you continue to do so). That should make them feel a bit more confident about you going :)


      Yeah, It was actually worse on paper than in reality, I haven't skipped that much, just for different important things, like the topman grand opening party in Vancouver (it was awesome!). I don't think that they are mad about the skipping anymore, instead my mom thinks I'm too young to go. How would I convince her I'm not to young?
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      I had bronchitis... did you not read the first post? And not 18 days, 18 classes. Thats 4 classes a day, which means only 4 and a half days...


      Only 4 and a half days? That should not affect it at all in my opinion. Me, on the other hand, at my worst, was off for months. I can understand why people have a hard time believing my word, hahaha. :D
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      Linda wrote:

      I think the best way to show (take it from someone who knows from a lot of experience, you can talk all you want, but until you show them, it won't mean anything) them you're responsible is to not miss anymore class, or skip it for that matter. Do really good on homework and tests, maybe bring your grades up a bit, do some extra credit, help out around the house, volunteer for crappy household chores, offer to make dinner, etc.


      This.^

      To show responsibility you can start with things like washing, cleaning, cooking and shopping. Things like that are usually considered as good and shows a new level of who you are. But remember, that is only standard stuff. To really show that you're responsible - handle things outside the house like a grown-up, like work (or in your case your classes).
      [SIZE=1]"Imagine a king who fights his own battles. Wouldn't that be a sight?" - Achilles[/SIZE]
    • Re: Convincing parents I'm responsible.

      Shellyyy wrote:

      This.^

      To show responsibility you can start with things like washing, cleaning, cooking and shopping. Things like that are usually considered as good and shows a new level of who you are. But remember, that is only standard stuff. To really show that you're responsible - handle things outside the house like a grown-up, like work (or in your case your classes).

      Yeah I'm trying this. I think they have gotten over it and are actually considering allowing me to go.

      MikeNY wrote:

      18 days or classes either way is ridiculous. Like I said you're either responsible or you're not. There's no "proving" just be responsible...

      Well, I am responsible, but they feel I am not for one reason or another. So, in order for them to take my request seriously I have to 'prove' I'm responsible...

      Intermission wrote:

      Tbh, you shouldn't even try. Save your money up and buy tickets yourself and go.

      Money isn't the issue at all, it's them trusting me enough to go. To be honest, I haven't done all that much to take away trust, I think mainly they just need to see that I can take care of myself. Which I can...