Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

    • Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

      Seriously, what the fuck?

      Let me just count how many friends I have... oh wait I have none. I mean, I have those acquaintances, the people I stand with in the morning, the people I sit next to in class. But really, I have no real friends. This is my fault, I know. Most of the time, I don't really care, I just do my own thing, and most of the time, I'm okay with it.

      But then there's this cycle, like right now. I suddenly realize, again, that I have literally nobody to really talk to, to have a deep conversation with. I did have a best friend once. Since 3rd grade (I'm a Junior now), we were friends. We always texted and talked about the deepest things. Before then, since I was so shy and guarded, she spent literally months slowly convincing me to open up to her. I told her about the people I liked, the people I dated, the heart breaks. And then I was so naive that I was surprised when she asked me out. I was so oblivious. I told her that I wasn't ready, I wanted to grow up some more.

      We don't text anymore. She said she was over me. I just wanted to stay friends, and now I don't have a best friend. And then Summer came, and because I make no effort to hang out with people, thats when I lose most of my friends. To top it off I'm in a program where you go to college while still in high school, so in college, I have no friends.

      I know at this point I'm just rambling, but I'm not sure what to do or what to think. I've been through this cycle so many times that I know that in a couple of days I'll go back to not caring that I lack any friends, but I don't really want to go back there, because when I'm there, I honestly could care less about making friends. But right now, I just want someone to talk to.

      Whenever I had some sort of realization in my life, I would text her, my best friend. But I haven't talked to her in so long. I feel like I have so much that I want to talk about, but no one to talk to. Again, I know this is my fault. But before, I didn't care. But sometimes it gets too be too much and it crushes me and it feels like I'm being deprived of something.
    • Re: Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

      If you would've tell us that you never had a really good friend maybe this should've been concerning and there was a possibilty that's something is wrong with you. But you've managed to get a friend once so there's no real reason it wouldn't happen again.
      I don't know what you exactly should do or think but i know what you shouldn't. You definitely shouldn't think that just because you currently don't have a best friend it means that's something wrong with you and start falling into a cycle of self-pity, frustration and depression. That's pretty much the best way to make sure that you'll never have any friends.
      There are all the cliches i'm sure you know, i.e. go out more, start talking to new people etc.. and they are true but they're not a magical solution and usually less easier than people say they are.
      The real key, imo, is patience. Making a new really best friend is not a thing that can be done within a week, it's a long proccess but in the end it's worth it. Trying too desperately to get friends will led you most of the times to the most shallow people in the area. I knew my current best friend more than a year before he became a friend of mine. Give things time to work themselves out, they will.
      By the way, how much time passed since your friend left you? Maybe she was in an initial shock and don't really want to cut you from her life.
      And one more thing you said that is very true and i don't think is being said enough: it's completely normal to want to be alone and you shouldn't feel bad for not wanting to be with friends 24/7. Actually people that are circled with friends all the time are often just too dumb and shallow to be able to handle themselves when they're alone.

      The post was edited 3 times, last by RDCF ().

    • Re: Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

      Hi Nick,

      Just be yourself dude, friends will come, sign up for some after school activities, get involved with your local community, volunteer your time to a charitable orgization, join a club, theres all kinds of ways to meet and make new friends! Good luck to u!
    • Re: Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

      ahaha you're just like me! :L
      You just need to snap yourself into reality, don't be so laid back, actually try to make friendships and conversation with people. My mum says I always sit around waiting for someone else to contact me.. which is relatively true. But sometimes I just think I'm bothering them and sometimes, even my closest friends, ignore me for months.
      Try and make friends with the same sex. I'm friends with the opposite sex all the time and it just gets confusing because they can start liking you more than a friend so you have to distance yourself from them in the end.
      Not talking to someone for a while is a good opportunity and reason to contact them again. Text her and say that you miss talking to her, that you haven't spoken for ages.. it'll make her feel appreciated and she'll speak to you again :)
      You just have to make the effort and appear willing to talk and open to a friendship.
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      la rubia loca wrote:

      what is prolapse?
      is it like pro life?
    • Re: Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

      looks like someone far away from me ,there is someone like me and its you man..okay i would give suggestion try to join some classes like dance or computer or some classes which suits your hobby ,you will find people in those classes with same interest of yours..and you can make new friends there..life name is to change and to move on and to make some new friends in life..
      its only my opinion
      thanks
    • Re: Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

      RDCF wrote:


      By the way, how much time passed since your friend left you? Maybe she was in an initial shock and don't really want to cut you from her life.

      Its been a few moths since we last talked. But it was bound to happen, we were friends since 3rd grade when it was no big deal to have a best friend girl, but then she started liking me and it got complicated.

      geraldWayne wrote:


      Just be yourself dude, friends will come, sign up for some after school activities, get involved with your local community, volunteer your time to a charitable organization, join a club, theres all kinds of ways to meet and make new friends! Good luck to u!

      I might join some sort of club, I'm not sure.

      Hann. wrote:

      ahaha you're just like me! :L
      You just need to snap yourself into reality, don't be so laid back, actually try to make friendships and conversation with people. My mum says I always sit around waiting for someone else to contact me.. which is relatively true. But sometimes I just think I'm bothering them and sometimes, even my closest friends, ignore me for months.
      Try and make friends with the same sex. I'm friends with the opposite sex all the time and it just gets confusing because they can start liking you more than a friend so you have to distance yourself from them in the end.
      Not talking to someone for a while is a good opportunity and reason to contact them again. Text her and say that you miss talking to her, that you haven't spoken for ages.. it'll make her feel appreciated and she'll speak to you again :)
      You just have to make the effort and appear willing to talk and open to a friendship.

      Alright I'll take your advice and text her. She's probably going to come off as small talk-ish though...
      And I always make better friends with girls. Like in 3rd grade I used to have lunch with just a group of girls, which I didn't think it was a big deal then, but IDK. I can't really connect to guys I'm not sure why.

      mohsomani wrote:

      looks like someone far away from me ,there is someone like me and its you man..okay i would give suggestion try to join some classes like dance or computer or some classes which suits your hobby ,you will find people in those classes with same interest of yours..and you can make new friends there..life name is to change and to move on and to make some new friends in life..
      its only my opinion
      thanks

      Dance, no. Computer, yes. I'm going to be taking some programming classes next quarter. And I really like music stuff. I'm learning piano and guitar and I've been singing for a year now. So I'll try and get some classes for that or join some clubs and whatnot.
    • Re: Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

      Have been and still am in that situation. I move often, 11 times before 18 years of age, and honestly haven't tried making friends with anyone since middle school or so. Such as you said, I get in these moods where I find that no one has called, text, or messaged, in a couple of weeks (Lack of parents btw) and get very depressed/lonely. Whenever I get into these moods, I go into this spree of joining school organisations and clubs in the local area (where I am at) for a month or two, make a few friends, but then eventually drop out again due to being so concentrated on work and producing music. Anyway, what I am trying to get at is what others have mentioned, joining clubs/organisations, even if you aren't 100% interested in them, isn't a bad idea for making friends and making yourself feel involved and important. Give it a try.

      To be 100% honest, I would recommend to avoid technology classes. Join something more social.
    • Re: Why Am I Lonely as F**K?

      Thanks for all the input. I have another question.

      I made a couple friends, one in my math class, the other in my english class. I can joke around with them and it makes the class more fun. But my question is, is it normal for your friends to touch you? Like they are all guys and in my math class if I'm laying with my head down he will lay down to and put his arm on my elbow or head, not hard but you know. And he also pokes me in my stomach and tries to see if I am ticklish? LOL And another guy in the same class ruffles my hair sometimes when he walks by? And THEN the guy in my english class that I only befriended today kept touching my shoulder, like flicking or just poking or whatever.

      I mean, its been a while since I've had some real friends that I really connect with, I just want to know if this is a normal thing guy friends do?