is my father abusing me or just being fair?

    • is my father abusing me or just being fair?

      (im not sure if this is the right forum if not i apologise) My dad used to severly beat my mother and sister, in particular my sister. Then i was born and mum made him promise to stop the abuse. However, i've grown up in fear of him, he used to scream at me and call me names but i don't think he hit me much as a child, just a few times. As a teenager i found its been worse, the names aren't as nice, bitch and cow get thrown around. If i talk too enthusiastically about school i get told to shut up and stop going on and that he doesn't care. One day i didn't answer my phone when i was out on a walk and when i got back he thumped me 3 times viciously on the back and afterwards was incredibly sorry and nice and gave me money. On my 16th birthday he screamed at me when i stood wrong for a photo and told me to go fuck myself and that i ruined my own birthday.
      I've found ive gotten more and more scared of him, i cant cook in the kitchen because he'll shout at me, he always threatens to hit me, but doesn't do it, and lifts his hand to me all the time.
      I've not really been beaten, not the way my sister and mum have. I cant tell if this is abuse because he doesnt realise what he's even doing and i dont have it as bad as others i'm so confused. I'm so scared all the time.