My Dad Possibly Has A Girlfriend

    • My Dad Possibly Has A Girlfriend

      My mom and dad were married for about 15 years. My mom passed away 6 months ago, in February to cancer. I took it really hard and I still miss her a lot. It's never really something you get over. Anyways, today I heard my dad talking on the phone to this lady and he was flirting with her a lot and complimenting her and all this stuff...it made me feel really upset because I'm so not ready to accept another woman in the house. I really want my dad to be happy because I love my dad more than anything but I mean...if he brings this woman home I don't even know what I'll say. I won't call her mom and I won't treat her like my mom, because my mom's death was not fair.
      The way he was talking to her, it was like my mom never even existed to him and that made my heart hurt so bad. My mom meant the world to me and it's still hard to accept the fact that she's gone. I don't wanna be a bitch to this lady that my dad might be bringing home soon, but if I do have to meet her, I don't know how to act. Does anyone else have a similar situation??

      The post was edited 1 time, last by carneystreet ().

    • Re: My Dad Possibly Has A Girlfriend

      I can't relate personally but my friend lost her mom. It was over a year before her dad brought home another lady. She took it hard at first but ended up becoming best friends with her. She said it actually help fill the void she had felt although nothing can replace her. I don't think this helps you but I thought I'd share. In my mind I would think your dad would still be grieving but maybe this is his way of coping with your moms death. Hang in there, sorry for your loss.
      16, BI and Hello!!
    • Re: My Dad Possibly Has A Girlfriend

      carneystreet wrote:

      My mom and dad were married for about 15 years. My mom passed away 6 months ago, in February to cancer. I took it really hard and I still miss her a lot. It's never really something you get over. Anyways, today I heard my dad talking on the phone to this lady and he was flirting with her a lot and complimenting her and all this stuff...it made me feel really upset because I'm so not ready to accept another woman in the house. I really want my dad to be happy because I love my dad more than anything but I mean...if he brings this woman home I don't even know what I'll say. I won't call her mom and I won't treat her like my mom, because my mom's death was not fair.
      The way he was talking to her, it was like my mom never even existed to him and that made my heart hurt so bad. My mom meant the world to me and it's still hard to accept the fact that she's gone. I don't wanna be a bitch to this lady that my dad might be bringing home soon, but if I do have to meet her, I don't know how to act. Does anyone else have a similar situation??


      Don't call her mom, she's not nor ever will be your mother, but don't be rude. Your mom meant very muh to your dad aswell, but think about it, he still deserves a shot at love again before he also goes. 15 years is a long time to devote to someone, but it shows he's in it for the long haul. My dad never was around, but he's still alive, and though several people have waltzed into my life as supposed father figures, every single one has waltzed back out (my mom's picky but always picks losers :nono: ) so I don't have a fther figure, but just because I don't like the guys she dated, doesn't mean I had to act like I hated them.
      I am the true Don, and as one, you know my life as a life worth inquiring about :cool:
    • Re: My Dad Possibly Has A Girlfriend

      Hey I'm sorry this is happening to you but dont worry she wont replace your mom. Your dad is probably just dealing with his own stuff and maybe a relationship will make him happy after something so bad like that happened to you guys. you dont have to love her but your dad probably likes her so just dont treat her like a jerk but you dont have to treat her like shes your new mom or anything.
    • @carneystreet

      I'm sorry your passed and from cancer; my mother died also back in 2008 after a short battle with advanced cancer, and I've had to go through other bereavements. But time can be a great healer though for you, Hun, it's early days yet, you might find bereavement counselling helpful like I did. As another has said, please don't be rude to the woman who your father is dating. He has a life to start over again and though his sadness since your mum's passing has been difficult, he is genuinely wanting companionship and we all deserve that because we have lives to live to the full. While your dad's girlfriend may never replace your mother, you must try and be more accomodating to her. If the same were to ever happen to you, your heart would seek solace in finding someone to love also.

      There will come a time when it will be necessary to meet your father's girlfriend, and you owe it to his happiness to introduce yourself to her and be pleasant. Your dad will be proud of you for doing that, and who knows that in time, his girlfriend and you just might become friends. We have to make an effort even if we disagree with the ones we love. Your father is part of you, and deserves respect. In carrying your dear mother's memory in your heart, she will always remain there though life for us all, has to go on.



      Sometimes the best memories people make, are new ones.
    • I am really sorry for your loss! I don't know if I am too late or not, but I have a question for you. How communicative have you and your dad been since your mother passing away? I think your father is a bit lonely and still misses your mum, but he sees something in this new woman that reminds him of your mum OR maybe she helps him deal with life without your mum. You should talk to him about this and say how you feel.

      I would also feel like it's too early for him to "move on" like this, but try to get to know this woman better. She will never be able to replace your mum and the memories you have with her, but don't reject her immediately. If you can, tell her how you feel, but only if you are comfortable around her :saint:
      A smile when you hold back your tears is lonely, isn't it?