How to gain confidence in talking?

    • How to gain confidence in talking?

      Hey guys, I'm new here and wanted some help. If you don't want to read the whole thing basically: how do I get the guts to approach, talk, and hold a conversation with people? How do I break out my shell and show people I'm more than just quiet and smart?

      There's this girl in my class that I don't sit in front of in History that I'm really in to. She's a lesbian too so it works out, but I never have the guts to talk to her. I feel like if I talk to her I'll annoy her or she'll be weirded out by me since the only thing she knows about me is that Im the really smart girl who doesn't talk. We've only talked once or twice and it was only pertaining to school work and I couldn't get the concersations to last more than a minute. It's not that I don't like to talk, I can make great conversation if it falls in line with my interests (gaming, anime, manga, debate, etc), if I'm simply listening to other people's conversations, or if I'm debated or presenting something I'm well versed of or proud of, but talking about senseless things doesn't come naturally to me. I overthink every step I make, and I always try to think of stuff to talk about beforehand only to worry myself too much and chicken out. It's even harder when her friends are around, because they don't let me join their conversations no matter how much I try to add things to their convos. It's not just her I'm trying to talk to, but classmates as well (the nicer ones). I feel like having friends would not only benefit me socially (Im an introvert so I don't need friends to have fun, but they're nice to have) but also make me appealing in her eyes. No one wants to date the quiet person do they? I'm only quiet in class though, at home with family I'm the total opposite. I just want the opportunity to show her this other fun, creative, energetic side of me one-on-one so her perception of me is in a better light. (I have no idea what her perception of me is right now :/ ) What can I do to gain confidence in socialization and what I have to say? Thnx in advance.
      The person everyone wants to see is the true you. The you that's stripped of the mask and the fancy clothes, the you that's pure and simple, the you where everything, from interests to insecurities, is shown in full light. Be yourself, and nobody else.
    • Well, I'm pretty quiet, but managed to fall in love with my childhood sweetheart Jenni and marry her! But I value conversation because it puts us among people we get on best with. In your situation I would switch your social group at school to a group you prefer the best. You know, people who like your kind of music, places to hang out and shared interests since there seems so many varying social groups of people. At school you are likely to see them gathered together at lunchtime. You already seem to be a good listener, so your hearing other people is going to sway what you like and what you don't.

      One of the greatest things mummy taught me was at introduction, always look the other person in the eye, smile and give a firm handshake with a "Howdy" or whatever. That has helped me no end with people, and I left school a good nine years now, though miss mummy since she died in 2008. I've had to muster up courage, and it's not been easy - but then, it's not impossible either, Hun. Wearing a slight smile is enormously disarming to the other person, I've found. It makes them respond and that cute lesbian girl you're really into, praps she's as shy as you, but all you need to say is "Hello, how you're doing? I'm Gardevoir!" and going from there.

      I like your name. And welcome to Teen Hut Forums. :)

      ~ Poppi



      Sometimes the best memories people make, are new ones.
    • It is quite simple to build confidence in our personality while talking; most probably we are unable to boost our confidence level while facing any interview, personality and other things. It will definitely affect our performance; therefore we should boost our confidence level through different approach like interacting with different people which helps to improve our talking style; facing problems, interviews and many other it will definitely improve our patience and confidence.