I'm 12, almost 13. I'm a Tomboy, and all my friends are boys and all my fun is sports. Football, basketball, soccer, running and racing my friends, bike riding, swimming, hiking and exploring the woods near my home. I don't really have anyone to talk to about this. Girls in my class are so girly. They wear girls clothes and makeup. I hang out with the guys, no makeup, and I only wear bluejeans and t-shirts. My problem is my boobs started growing so fast. A year ago when I was 11 I was flat chested and all was fine. This year they really came. My Mom has huge boobs. She wears DDD bras but most of her chest don't even fit in her bra. I think for her to fit she would need a M cup bra or something so huge. I worry so much I will end up like my Mom. I don't have a bra yet. When I ask my Mom she says I didn't even start growing yet, and she tells me she didn't have her 1st bra till she was 17. My boobs are bigger than my hands now and they really bounce a lot and hurt when I run or play sports. I see bras in the store and I think I'm already too big for the bras in the girls section, I think I would fit a woman's bra C cup or maybe tight in a B cup? My Dad died in a construction accident when I was 9. I have twin brothers they are 9 now. I also have a little sister she is 7. My Mom has heart problems and can't work. Things got real hard after my Dad died. The money stopped. We just get some money and food stamps from the government now. We normally are very low on food after the 20th of the month. I think we don't have money for a bra so I don't ask. My Mom did say maybe in a few years if I keep growing. But I like sports with the guys. It is getting harder to play. The guys don't have my big boob problem. Last Saturday we were playing football. I'm trying to be careful now because they bounce a lot. But last Saturday I took a bad hit, a shoulder right to my left boob. I thought I was going to die, they never hurt so bad as that before. I had to turn my back to the guys and hold my left boob so tight. I had tears. They asked if I was OK.. I could only say ”give me a minute". I tried to play again but each bounce was like a knife stabbing my left one after that hit. I had to give up. I even had to cross my arms and try to hold my left one to walk home. It hurt for 2 more days.

The past 2 summers my best friends (Jake and David) and me go out exploring the woods near where we live. A few times we decided to swim in the pond near the middle of the woods, there is a tire swing over the water and everything. We would just decide to jump in... Strip down to underwear and jump in. It seemed fine when I was flat on top. But this year everything changed - the flat chested part is no longer flat... This summer when we go to the woods.. We may come across the pond... They may want to swim like the past two years.. I don't want to be left out. Should I take off my shirt and jump in with them like it is all normal to have my boobs out.. Should I jump in with my shirt on.. But when I get out my wet shirt will show my boobs anyway. Plus I'll have the wet shirt and cold boobs for an hour or two.. While David and Jake have nice dry shirts. Think if we end up at the pond I'll have to just take off my shirt and pretend it is just like last year, all normal. We just go out with no real plan. Even if we had a plan to go to the pond and swim my swimsuit wouldn't work because it is 2 years old now. I wear it, but it was made for a girl who is flat. I can cover my chest with my old suit - but barely. If I get too active my boobs come out. I cant jump or dive off the diving board or walk too fast. When I wear it Mom says I need to wear a towel over my shoulders till I get in the water. My boobs suck!

Now I'm also so worried. I don't want my boobs any bigger. They kill me now. They slow me down and some days they just hurt so much for no reason. What if they keep growing? I read online girls grow boobs like their Moms. I couldn't live with my Mom's boobs. I couldn't do anything if so big as her! No sports, my Mom can't even catch our old dog or ride a bike! I read that boobs can keep growing until a girl is 18 or 19. I'm dieing now and not yet 13...

I try to make them stop growing. I try so hard to push my boobs back in my chest. Sometimes I push so hard I cry. Anything to make them stop growing. When I saw my boobs were bigger than the girly girls in my class I was so embarrassed. I started sleeping on the hard floor. I put down two books and sleep with my boobs smashed on the books. I think they were still growing. Now I put a piece of wood on top of the books and smash my boobs on the wood when I sleep. Anything to make them stop growing. I still want to play sports with my friends.

A few weeks ago Jake, David and me had plans to go out running. Then they said they wanted to include running the steps at our high school's football stadium. We have done this many times, but the past few months each time hurts my chest more. The past few times i've been embarrassed because I had to interlock my fingers and hold my hands over them because they bounced so hard running down the stairs. I could make it a few flights, but after that I just had to hold them. They made me feel soooo weak. Running up the stairs wasn't as bad, but something about running down the stairs just killed me! A few months earlier I could keep up with Jake and David, sometimes even beat them.. but now I go slower and cant swing my arms because I must spend my energy just holding my boobs. Anyway, back to the time a few weeks ago.. i had found some old duct tape in the hallway closet. I hid it in my bedroom. I had read about Miss America models taping their boobs for the evening gown competition because bras don't work in those gowns. I thought maybe I could use some tape too. The day they wanted to run was also one of the days my boobs just really hurt for no reason. That day I thought if I was going to run with them I would use the duct tape. I went home and took off my shirt. I had to push up my boobs and taped them tight. I stretched and pushed the tape from my boobs around to my back. I put a long strip under them to the back and another long strip of tape over the middle/top of them to the back. The top strip was even harder to put on. Arms just dont bend right to tape your own boobs. I did it good enough, but that tape was so ugly! It was hard work, took too long, and the boys just thought i was changing into shorts and running shoes. I didnt have much time. I couldn't tell them I was taping my boobs this time. I could run harder again with out all the endless loose bouncing. I didnt need to hold my boobs. I felt strong and free again. Some parts of having the tape was good. They didnt hurt near as much as I was worried about. But my sweat couldn't come out and the tape was hot. Plus my boobs looked funny under my shirt. My poor boobs were squished all lobsided by the duct tape. The worst part was later. I got home after running, all happy I didn't have to hold my boobs this time.. then I started trying to take off the tape. I couldn't. It was stuck hard to my back, sides, and all over my boobs. I couldn't pull the tape the right way to take it off my back. I didnt know who could help me. My twin 9 yr old brothers? Admit to Jake (I'm a little closer to Jake than David) that I taped my boobs and ask him to help. No way to tell my Mom. I called Jake. We have been friends forever. He knows me like a brother. Better than my 9 year old brothers. I was so happy Jake didn't laugh at me. I was soooo embarrassed. He came in my room and he was gentle with the tape. We have been good friends but never romantic. He even had the idea to rub cooking oil on my skin right where the tape was coming off. That seemed to help a lot. He took the tape off my back. It took a long time. We talked as I layed on my stomach. He is the first person to hear about how much trouble my boobs are. We are the same age, he just turned 13. I finally had to roll over. I was scared. But he was even more gentle taking the duct tape off my front. He would rub the cooking oil on my skin and lift just a little of the tape at a time. I would hold my skin down so it would seperate from the tape as Jake pulled the tape up and off. As he worked more of my boobs showed. I could tell he was so aroused. The worst part was still to come. I wanted to do it myself.. but he had already seen me at my worst.. (I thought) i was not ready for how much pain was yet to come. I was in a hurry when I put the tape on. I did not think about taking it off, it was already much much much worse to get off than I expected. The worst part was the duct tape stuck to my nipples. Jake was crazy gentle, but it didnt matter. They were already so sensitive that day. Just them rubbing inside my shirt hurt all day in school this was the main reason I wanted to try the tape anyway. Taking off the duct tape from my nipples was pure torture. I would hold my boobs. He rubbed in the cooking oil and would pull just a little. I screamed into a pillow and cried and begged him to stop. He would rub more oil.. pull again.. I would scream into a pillow and more tears and hold his arm and beg him to stop. It was so terrible. Worse than any nightmare I ever had. The pain and torture of my nipples getting the duct tape off made me so sweaty. I will never ever do that again. Jake was so good to me too. He was so concerned. He promissed he wouldn't tell anyone and he promissed we wouldn't run the stairs again unless I had a good bra. He didn't laugh at my tape or my boobs. I could tell he liked them a lot. I was so happy he could help me. When he was done he didnt try anything. But he did lean over, tell me he thought I was beautiful and he kissed my forehead - and he handed me my shirt.

i just started thinking maybe Jake could help. Though he doesn't really know how poor we are. I hate to seem like someone on the street asking for money. He mows lawns for money now. I think I could help him. I'm not so helpless. I will ask if I can help and we could split some of his lawn mowing money.
My Mom is just so big on top she thinks I'm still like a flat chested girl. Compared to her I haven't started growing yet. She tells story's about her boobs all the time. Since she is so big they have been like her only thing since she was my age. She says no guy has ever looked in her eyes since she was 12. She started going into bars when she was 14 and no one ever asked her for ID. All the guys bought her free drinks. She could never find clothes or bras big enough that fit. No swimming at all. Guys always grabbing her chest, she stopped riding a bike when her knees started hitting her boobs. Guys skipping class and going to watch her run when her PE class in school had a running day. The guys would stand by the school track and clap and yell as she ran by. Mom has started telling me all her huge boob stories. When I complained about my boobs and running my Mom took off her shirt, put on her DDD bra and did 6 jumps. Her chest bounced so much. Then she showed me her shoulders where the bra straps went.. Her skin was so red there, just a few more jumps and she would lose her skin under the straps. She looks at me like my chest is still a little girls chest. After the tape thing I did I knew holding them with a bra would help. I took one of my bothers socks and shoe strings from a pair of tennis shoes they out grew. I worked on it for a few hours, I ended up with a sort of strapless bra that helps a little. It looks OK under some of my shirts. It is hard to put on though. I have to tie the shoe strings in front then twist it around so the sock part holds me right. I can't tie it too tight or if I do I can't twist it around and get my boobs in right. Having boobs.. Such a big problem!!! Boys don't worry about any of this!!! I can run a little better in my sock bra, I didn't try any sports yet but I think it will be better there too. I don't think it will do much for running down the stairs though or help if I get another shoulder to my boob playing football, but at least they don't just swing around totally free. I'm looking for more shoe strings so I can make shoulder straps next. I am careful at the house with my sock bra. I think my Mom would laugh and throw it away if she knew. I can't wait to ask Jake if I can help him mow people's yards. After the tape thing on my boobs Jake has been real nice to me. I think he started to feel sorry i had such problems with them. He watches me closer now. He knows when Im trying ti hold them. Now when we run or play football he always asks if I'm ok. I know he is really asking if my boobs are Ok. I bet he will let me help and in a few weeks maybe I could have a real bra, the grass is growing good now. I just pray everyday my boobs stop growing. I can't be like my Mom!

sorry if too dramatic. Just I think all my worries now revolve around my Mom's chest. I have those jeans.. In a few years - omg.. Don't know what I'll be able to do. I'm starting to have the same early problems now, and I'm not even 13 yet..

Spent some time here today reading some and replying some. Jake called now.. getting another football game going soon. Time to test my stupid sock and shoestring bra. Hope it keeps things a little more together.... will also check on helping out with Jake's lawn mowing...

Thanks for the offer, but Im crazy independent. Jake said I can help mow so in a few weeks I can take care of myself better. Also the football in my sock bra thing.. worked.. but not so well.. too stretchy.. so for advice - dont try to make a bra from shoestrings and a cut up sock. I have a bunch of t-shirts that got too tight. I think i can use them. They are tight. I can cut them off.. run the shoestring around holes in the bottom to tighten it up some more.. or i can try the same thing I did with the sock and shoe string but use part of a t-shirt that isnt so stretchy.. add some straps over the shoulders.. and the new girl twins should be held in place much better. After helping Jake with 4 or 5 lawns I can buy a nice blue Nike Sports Bra I've been kind of looking at. Yahoo!

Today playing football was great. I wore the bra thing and didnt have to worry so much about hurting things. It helped. Jake has been watching me so close since the tape thing too. He noticed I had something on under my shirt. He laughed when he found out it was a sock and shoestring bra.. but he said that might still be better than duct tape. He punched my shoulder twice.. he never used to do that. He stayed closer by me than normal too. I think the tape thing affected him a lot. I think he likes me a little now. He was always good as a friend. If he likes me more maybe it is ok. We like doing the same things and always spend a lot of time together any way. Will see.. i dont want to push it.. being friends has been good.. being more than friends with a friend is bad if it doesn't work out.