What it was like to fall in love with my best friend - PART FOUR

    • What it was like to fall in love with my best friend - PART FOUR

      We had "watched" a series of horror movies, and by the time the third movie came on, he grabbed my face and started kissing me. I found myself sitting on him, and things got heated really quickly.
      After a lonnnng makeout sesh, he asked me if I wanted to. I sat there for at least 20 minutes saying no, telling him this was all wrong, that he still had a girlfriend. But again, I gave in. We ended up having sex. And it had been the best yet. Things escalated, and he walked me home telling me how much better that had been, that he hadn't had something that good in a long time. I guess I was a little relieved, but I felt regret. We hung out for the rest of the summer, and he always walked over just to see me. We were in love.
      School started back up, and that's when everything else fell apart. I had a big mouth at the time, and by then, Maddy and I were no longer friends. I had no one but Jake. But even then, we weren't able to speak at school. I had classes with the girl Mike used to talked to, Maddy, and even Mike. All in one class. How terrible eh. I tried to survive more days of high school, but enough was enough. I was depressed. More than I had ever been before. I couldn't handle life. Myself. My school. Anyone. I isolated myself, and was so mentally unstable that I had gotten sent home for crying at the start of class. I was alone. It wasn't until several months later when Mike's old girlfriend... Let's call her Same, accepted my apology. We became friends. And things between us were back to how it always used to be. Things had been falling back to place. Slowly but surely. Prior to this though, I spent several days hiding in the bathroom stalls at lunch, or going home. I had no one to sit with, and knew that I wouldn't even stand a chance trying to sit with other people. It wasn't until before Sam and I made up that no one knew about Jake and I having sex. I made the mistake of telling someone I didn't know about all of my secrets, that he eventually, told Sam, who told, you know, just about everyone. This had been hell week. People were talking, especially my own best friends. I knew I had no one, and struggled to wake up every morning for school. I hated walking into the class we all had, or walking in the halls. I felt like I was the talk of the whole school and no one understood the pain I had to deal with. Meanwhile, Jake got none of the hate I did. When Maddy found out, they had gotten back together, and he fell for it. All. Over. Again. I moved on, I became the most independent I had ever been in a long time. And my grades had gone way up. I figured if no one will be here for me, at least I still have myself. And I was okay with that. Fast forward, my life had changed. For the better. I got rid of all the toxic relationships, and found myself back with my best friends. I was happy. Meanwhile, after several attempts of Maddy trying to ruin my life, she had ultimately, ruined her own. She cried about everything, and everyone had moved on from the past, and felt like everything should just be over and done with. She had no friends, she only had Jake... For now. Just recently, they had broken up. For real and for good this time. When I found out about this, I was overjoyed, but I didn't say anything.
      It was in November when I texted him about his sweaters, and he told me I could keep them. I knew he didn't care for them, but I figured it was a good conversation starter. We ended up becoming friends, and had a little more fun than I had expected that night. Thank you snapchat. After not even a day of being friends, I had found out that he was trying to go for someone else. I confronted him about it after he continued to ignore me, and he said itd be best if we kept our distance for a long time. I was hurt. Again. But it didn't stop me. Two months later, my phone sent me a reminder that it was his birthday. I messaged him wishing him the best, and he was surprised. He ended up wanting to start over again, and I said yes without a doubt. We became good friends after a couple days, and by the end of the week. He asked to facetime.

      PART FIVE COMING SOON.