I recently turned 13, but I get hit on by older men because I am physically premature

    • I recently turned 13, but I get hit on by older men because I am physically premature

      I started developing a lot last year, and I currently have 32D breasts and wide hips, so I more or less have the shape of an adult woman.
      However, other than that, it is pretty clear for most people that I am still very young, since I have a very young face and I am currently only 4'9 tall.
      But despite this, I often notice that men who are a lot older than me will either check me out or hit on me - it isn't very obvious most of the time, but some of them have called me a "pretty girl" and suggested dates with me, or have been unable to resist looking at my chest on occasions.
      And I am a very timid person as well, so I find it hard to deal with those situations, and I will just try to say that I am 13, and they will say that I look older than that.
      I will then lie about having a boyfriend (I am single), and find an excuse to leave.
      And the fact that I am short is another reason why I easily feel anxious around them, since pretty much all of them are a lot taller than me, and no doubt much, much stronger as well.

      Is this something that typically happens to girls who are premature?
      And how should I handle it?
    • Hey Gabrielle.

      I'm sorry you suffer because of those older guys and i fully understand you are scared. I think this happens to a lot of premature girls who start development, especially if their shape comes close to adult women.
      I like to look at young girls too ( and women my age ), but i would never ask them for a date or hit on them. I can't always resist to peak on their chest or butt but i try not to stare. ( when i told a adult female friend i look at her chest some times she said she never noticed, so i hope i'm that discrete in all situations )
      Older guys should be able to tell if you are at least 18 (21 for US i think ) or not. So if they still hit on you, there is something wrong with them. Some guys in their 20s may not see you are too young because they are young themselfs, but older guys should not stare or hit on you.

      I think the way you handle it (by saying to have a boyfriend ) is a good way. You could call them out loud in public, like "you know you're hitting a 13 year old GIRL, right?!" But that take courage. I'm a shy person myself so i know it's not as easy as it sounds. And of course if possible get away from them. You don't need an excuse, just leave. They don't deserve another word from you. Another thing that could help is to try to have a friend with you, so you don't encounter these situations alone. And if you get along with your parents, tell them. I imagine if you tell a father his premature daughter get's hit on by an older guy, this guy is going to get in trouble with that dad.

      I hope you won't get in such a situation again.
      curious open-minded short but not so short guy from Germany. open for conversations/PMs, all topics, all ages, all genders
    • Thank you.
      I try to avoid being alone with a guy I don't know if he has seemed to hit on me.

      I guess that this is a bit extra difficult for me since I am at a significant physical disadvantage as well;
      I am all too painfully aware that an adult man who is alone with me could very easily rape me if he wanted to do it, and that freaks me out quite a bit.
      I recently had to pass through a long corridor on a train when I traveled to visit one of my friends, and it was a night train since I had to travel for about 5 hours in the evening, and one adult man, probably about 6'4 tall and physically imposing and maybe in his 40s was standing there by an open compartment door, which I think was actually his private room, and he gave me a couple glances (I was wearing a tank top that time, since it was warm, and I regretted doing that when I saw him looking at me).
      It would have been so easy for him to just drag me inside, and I looked at him several times with scared eyes until I had passed him.
      Those situations are definitely the worst.

      I was wondering however, why is it that men seem to get easily attracted to a premature 13-year-old girl?
      I have tried finding an answer to this, and I have heard that it is a combination of an adult-looking body and a very youthful appearance.
      And apparently it is also because they feel that th
    • Can't imagine how terrible and frightening that has to be.
      I'm small and weak myself, so i understand that fear. It's sad you have to deal with such persons. You should avoid traveling alone and/or at late times.
      About what you wear: it shouldn't matter. Wear what makes you fell comfortable. You are not the one doing something wrong if guys glance at you. I don't know where you live, but here in Germany it get's hot in the summer. And no one should have to burn just to cover himself up. The thing is: it doesn't really matter what you wear. Even if you walk around the street in a bikini or underwear no one is allowed to touch you or stare at you.
      If you are short you may have one advantage: you are faster because you are lighter. If you get scared search for help, go or if necessary run away. If they get too close, kick them in the balls or poke them in the eye. And when they are in pain, run.

      Or you become a martial arts master and kick their asses through the next wall. :)
      curious open-minded short but not so short guy from Germany. open for conversations/PMs, all topics, all ages, all genders
    • Benni90er wrote:

      Can't imagine how terrible and frightening that has to be.
      I'm small and weak myself, so i understand that fear. It's sad you have to deal with such persons. You should avoid traveling alone and/or at late times.
      About what you wear: it shouldn't matter. Wear what makes you fell comfortable. You are not the one doing something wrong if guys glance at you. I don't know where you live, but here in Germany it get's hot in the summer. And no one should have to burn just to cover himself up. The thing is: it doesn't really matter what you wear. Even if you walk around the street in a bikini or underwear no one is allowed to touch you or stare at you.
      If you are short you may have one advantage: you are faster because you are lighter. If you get scared search for help, go or if necessary run away. If they get too close, kick them in the balls or poke them in the eye. And when they are in pain, run.

      Or you become a martial arts master and kick their asses through the next wall. :)
      Haha, I probably should learn some martial arts.
      I do usually have an attack alarm with me when I have to travel alone, which feels a bit reassuring.

      The thing that I still fear though is if some man overpowered me enough so that I wouldn't be able to defend myself, like for example grabbing his arms around me so that I couldn't move.
      For example, the man on the night train could have grabbed me all around with one of his arms and put his other hand over my mouth, and if he had done that then he would've easily been able to just carry me inside and start doing whatever he wanted.
      It's scary to be aware that I wouldn't stand any chance against him whatsoever in that situation, and if I had tried to scream then he would've probably just knocked me out. (!)
      But of course, I try to avoid being alone with a guy like that.
    • Good, the alarm is very useful. Most attackers don't know what to do when they get called out and panic.

      Even big muscles can't protect a person's vital points. Go for the balls, anything in their face ( eyes, nose, ears ), you could try to hit the under site of his knee.

      I'm glad it hasn't happen to you and i hope it never will. You sound like a nice girl. You may look good too, but that's no reason to disrespect or hurt you.
      curious open-minded short but not so short guy from Germany. open for conversations/PMs, all topics, all ages, all genders
    • Benni90er wrote:

      Good, the alarm is very useful. Most attackers don't know what to do when they get called out and panic.

      Even big muscles can't protect a person's vital points. Go for the balls, anything in their face ( eyes, nose, ears ), you could try to hit the under site of his knee.

      I'm glad it hasn't happen to you and i hope it never will. You sound like a nice girl. You may look good too, but that's no reason to disrespect or hurt you.
      Thank you.
      I have heard that I am cute, but I do still have the face of a little kid, so adult men should be able to tell that I am very young, especially when I am also very short.

      I have heard that these kinds of men are blinded by the fact that I happen to have large breasts, and immediately think of that as something sexual.
    • I have to admit, i am ( and many others are too) very bad at guessing age. But i think how you describe yourself even i should see you are not mature. Your body would catch my eye. I would glance a moment, think you look good and that's it. And yes, breasts are seen as something sexual by many guys ( and even girls). I'm a breast guy myself. My younger self would have been happy to have a girl like you in his class :D But he's gone :D
      curious open-minded short but not so short guy from Germany. open for conversations/PMs, all topics, all ages, all genders
    • Benni90er wrote:

      I have to admit, i am ( and many others are too) very bad at guessing age. But i think how you describe yourself even i should see you are not mature. Your body would catch my eye. I would glance a moment, think you look good and that's it. And yes, breasts are seen as something sexual by many guys ( and even girls). I'm a breast guy myself. My younger self would have been happy to have a girl like you in his class :D But he's gone :D
      I am just not sure how I should react when men look at my breasts.
      Some of them aren't even discrete about it - I have seen a couple men literally rest their eyes right at my breasts for several seconds.
      I feel like I should tell them to stop looking, but I usually just choose to ignore them as well as I can.
      Like I said, I am very timid, so I often have problems speaking for myself and raising my voice, and I always try to avoid conflicts.
    • That depends what you actually want. If it annoys you you should tell them to stop. The other option would be to ignore them and there looks and carry on with your life regardless of their existence. That would be the most healthy, but only if you really don't care about them anymore. If you just try to bury it inside you, it will hurt you more and more.
      I can tell you a great site on reddit, where girls and women with big breasts can talk about their problems, for example creeps or bra fitting tips:
      reddit.com/r/bigboobproblems/
      You should use a separate account because if you post their, you could get messages from creeps - ignore those idiots.
      curious open-minded short but not so short guy from Germany. open for conversations/PMs, all topics, all ages, all genders
    • Gabrielle06 wrote:

      I started developing a lot last year, and I currently have 32D breasts and wide hips, so I more or less have the shape of an adult woman.
      However, other than that, it is pretty clear for most people that I am still very young, since I have a very young face and I am currently only 4'9 tall.
      But despite this, I often notice that men who are a lot older than me will either check me out or hit on me - it isn't very obvious most of the time, but some of them have called me a "pretty girl" and suggested dates with me, or have been unable to resist looking at my chest on occasions.
      And I am a very timid person as well, so I find it hard to deal with those situations, and I will just try to say that I am 13, and they will say that I look older than that.
      I will then lie about having a boyfriend (I am single), and find an excuse to leave.
      And the fact that I am short is another reason why I easily feel anxious around them, since pretty much all of them are a lot taller than me, and no doubt much, much stronger as well.

      Is this something that typically happens to girls who are premature?
      And how should I handle it?

      if you're not interested, just tell them that and move on. It is perfectly natural for adult men to be attracted to pubescent teen girls, no matter what certain crypto-fascist laws say. In Japan, the most educated and technologically advanced nation on Earth, you are already above the age of consent (just as an example). Love is not a crime, and a lot of girls your age tend to prefer older guys anyway.

      But anyway, the choice is yours. If a guy makes unwanted advances, tell him to stop. No gentlemen would continue to speak to a young lady who has told him she is not interested. Realize that they don't mean to insult you, and don't insult them, but insist that they stop if you feel uncomfortable.
    • Benni90er wrote:



      Older guys should be able to tell if you are at least 18 (21 for US i think ) or not. So if they still hit on you, there is something wrong with them.

      The age of consent in most of the US is actually 16. Also, some scientific research has s suggested that most heterosexual men are most attracted to girls around age 13. There is nothing wrong with it, and many girls that age prefer older guys. It's the crypt-fascist laws of modern society that are incorrect, not our natural inclinations.

      That being said, any man who approaches a lady of any age should do it respectfully.
    • Daniel Rumanos wrote:

      Benni90er wrote:

      Older guys should be able to tell if you are at least 18 (21 for US i think ) or not. So if they still hit on you, there is something wrong with them.
      The age of consent in most of the US is actually 16. Also, some scientific research has s suggested that most heterosexual men are most attracted to girls around age 13. There is nothing wrong with it, and many girls that age prefer older guys. It's the crypt-fascist laws of modern society that are incorrect, not our natural inclinations.

      That being said, any man who approaches a lady of any age should do it respectfully.
      All right. I agree that our morals and therefore the laws differ from our instincts.
      curious open-minded short but not so short guy from Germany. open for conversations/PMs, all topics, all ages, all genders
    • Benni90er wrote:

      Daniel Rumanos wrote:

      Benni90er wrote:

      Older guys should be able to tell if you are at least 18 (21 for US i think ) or not. So if they still hit on you, there is something wrong with them.
      The age of consent in most of the US is actually 16. Also, some scientific research has s suggested that most heterosexual men are most attracted to girls around age 13. There is nothing wrong with it, and many girls that age prefer older guys. It's the crypt-fascist laws of modern society that are incorrect, not our natural inclinations.
      That being said, any man who approaches a lady of any age should do it respectfully.
      All right. I agree that our morals and therefore the laws differ from our instincts.
      Laws are based upon local customs, not morality. The age of consent in Germany, where you live, is 14. It is the same in Italy. So it's legal for an adult man to have a 14-year-old girlfriend there, but if you take her to the UK, where he AoC is 16, it's suddenly a crime. But it would be unfair for a Brit to call a German (or a Japanese, since 13 is the AOC in their country) "immoral". There are many wonderful loving relationships between adults and teens. It is a shame that the news media constantly reports only the cases of sexual abuse.
    • Daniel Rumanos wrote:

      Benni90er wrote:

      Daniel Rumanos wrote:

      Benni90er wrote:

      Older guys should be able to tell if you are at least 18 (21 for US i think ) or not. So if they still hit on you, there is something wrong with them.
      The age of consent in most of the US is actually 16. Also, some scientific research has s suggested that most heterosexual men are most attracted to girls around age 13. There is nothing wrong with it, and many girls that age prefer older guys. It's the crypt-fascist laws of modern society that are incorrect, not our natural inclinations.That being said, any man who approaches a lady of any age should do it respectfully.
      All right. I agree that our morals and therefore the laws differ from our instincts.
      Laws are based upon local customs, not morality. The age of consent in Germany, where you live, is 14. It is the same in Italy. So it's legal for an adult man to have a 14-year-old girlfriend there, but if you take her to the UK, where he AoC is 16, it's suddenly a crime. But it would be unfair for a Brit to call a German (or a Japanese, since 13 is the AOC in their country) "immoral". There are many wonderful loving relationships between adults and teens. It is a shame that the news media constantly reports only the cases of sexual abuse.
      Right, calling it morals isn't the right word. And yes we should be careful to judge people from other societies by our standards.
      curious open-minded short but not so short guy from Germany. open for conversations/PMs, all topics, all ages, all genders