Apologies for your loss!

I know what you're going through. I lost my father when I was 8 years old. It is/was a very difficult thing to deal with. The only thing you can really do is just talk to your mother about how she's treating you and your sister. Let her know you have been affected just as badly as her but in different ways. That's what I had to do. My mom said because I was so young it didn't bother me as bad, but she was wrong. I bottle up my emotions so she doesn't see how I REALLY feel. I hope things get better. Once again, I'm sorry for the loss of your father.

Hey Jamie,

I know just what you mean. I have a lot of friends who have lost a lot of people that meant a lot to them, so I know how it goes. Your mom is having a tough time, just as you and your family are having a tough time. When you lose somebody in your family, there's a lot of things that need to be said, a lot of feelings and emotions, thoughts and words. I strongly suggest that you sit everyone down and talk about it, help each other get through it. It's not going to take one day, because this is something that you'll be gradually doing. This talk will reassure everyone that you can always support each other and just to stay strong through this.

My condolences for your loss.
armyforthebroken

Hey Jamie,

First off let me start by telling you of just how sorry I am to hear of your loss, my sympathy goes out to all of you.

When it comes to your mum - To be honest, Jamie, I don't think, right now, anything you do will calm her down. I think she will have to clam down in her own time - by other people telling her, may just make her more angry, upset, unfair and she may feel victimised if you say something to her. This may well be a phase your mum has to go through to reach the other side; which could ultimately be inner peace.

I can totally understand that you are hurting just as much as your mum, in a different way sure, but i'm sure for you and your sister, it's not nice having your mum come down on you both like a ton of bricks just after losing someone so dear and close to you all when all you want is a hug, and to be told everything will be okay.

All I can advise for you is this. Be there for your sister and mum, no matter how much she rants, complains, moans - all of you come as one. One strong, close little unit in which no one can destory. Have each others backs - if one starts to cry, sit with them, hold their hand, hug them and get through each day as best you can. Together. Each of you will need time apart, time alone to mourn, so do so.

Take care, Jamie.

Support Leader,
SimpleGirl*

I'm sorry for your loss.
I, too, lost my father to suciude in april of 07 and I'm only 13.
I also have an older sister who is 29. She didn't move in with us or anything but she lives right down the street and I lived with her for two weeks after my dad died. My father and I were very close, I was like daddy's little angel.

anyway, the same thing happened between my mother and I. you just have to understand that she is stressed out and probably has more on her plate than you do. (I don't have the best relationship with my mother either.) I would suggest helping out around the house more, even if it's just with little things. I would also suggest being pretty quiet when you're in the same room as your mother so you don't say the "wrong" thing.

and talk when she's ready, small talk sometimes also helps.
I'm sorry I know it didn't help much but that's what I did.
I'll add you so we can talk more if you would like.

good luck and I'm an soo sorry for your loss.
:)

Hey there I am sorry for your loss. But as a family no matter what you need to stick together. Help each other out, comfort each other when in need. Its hard, the pain feels like it will never go but it will i promise. Nothing you try and do will help your mum at the moment im afraid. You just have to wait till it passes. The only way from there is up. All the best Jamie

If I were in your shoes, I would just simply..and literally come up to her when she is mad and tell her "I miss him too" and then hug her really tight.
I would then try to explain to her that although this was a hard hit for the family, killing your self over the loss will not bring him back, not will it make things better. And I am 1,000,000% sure that he would not want you grieving. And then....both or all of you tell her that you will do anything in your power to help her through this. She is an adult, I am sure she will understand. If she doesn't then it is a denial stage....which will pass.

There is nothing I can say, at all...not a "good luck" nor "be strong" that will be able to describe how much strength I wish you.