Long Distance-ish?

    • Long Distance-ish?

      So there's this guy I've known since the first grade. (I'm 17 now, just finishing high school.) We lost contact after about 3rd grade, but he found me on facebook last year and we've been chatting almost every day since. He only lives an hour away, and I feel like we could really make a connection if I hung out with him in person. He's already outright told me he wants to see me again, but the problem is my parents. I don't know how I'd go about talking to them about him, since they're really nervous about anyone I date. Hell, I don't even really want a relationship with him so much as just someone to hang out with, or at the most, be friends with 'benefits.'

      I guess what I'm asking is should I go along with this? Is this at all a good idea, or am I in for more trouble than it's worth? And if it is a good idea, how could I get my parents to be okay with me going an hour out of town by myself? (Not to a big city, if it matters. They've sent me to other continents by myself, so I figure an hour away shouldn't be too difficult.)

    • Re: Long Distance-ish?

      You could just meet somewhere once or twice so that you can see how you like him. If you two become good friends (or more) then you can tell your parents. It shouldn't be too much of a hassle.
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    • Re: Long Distance-ish?

      Why don't you two just meet half way? It's only a half an hour difference so that's not even an issue as to transportation. Hang out with him and see how it goes; you don't have anything to lose and it's always beneficial to gain a new friend.

      As for your parents, tell them that you're meeting a friend of yours out for lunch or something else casual. You're 17, it's normal to go out with friends.
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    • Re: Long Distance-ish?

      I think you should talk to your parents before to see him.
      You try to find a best moment to speak about that with them.. It's important because they have confidence of you ..

      [I don't speak English well, I'm sorry if I had some spelling mitakes]

    • Re: Long Distance-ish?

      Well we've decided to meet up during the March Break, with me driving up to his town since I'm the only one with a car.

      I haven't told my parents yet, but I did tell my (very close) aunt who thought it was a great idea and offered to drive me up. One of my best friends, on the other hand, is really against the idea and wants me to demand he come to my town. (Impossible, no transportation. :/ ) I really value her compassion here, but she's never met the guy and I don't think she trusts my decisions after my previous relationships with guys have ended badly. I think this might be a stumbling block for my mom too, since she thinks every guy I talk about is my boyfriend (I have many male friends!) and she worries so much.

      So it looks like the general consensus here is to tell them, but not ask their permission since I'm old enough to make my own decisions. Am I correct here?

    • Re: Long Distance-ish?

      I've been in the same exact situation so I say go for it.

      Nothing bad could really come out of it.

      Your either going to make a new friend again and have someone to talk to and hang out with or it may go further and you may have a relationship.
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    • Re: Long Distance-ish?

      You really don't have anything to loose. You seem to know the guy pretty well and i don't think whether you go to his town or he comes to yours will make any difference when it comes to your friendship (or eventual relationship) with him so I don't really get why your friend is against the idea.

      As for your parents, my parents are very protective too and they would, in no way, let me (or even my 18-years old big sister) make a 1 hour trip out of town to go see a friend, especially a male one. Everything is black or white in their minds, if a female is friend with a female, it’s okay, but if a female is friend with a male they think that it will automatically lead to an uncontrollable love relationship, teenager pregnancy, stopping studies, failing their lives, etc… So I have no right to have a boyfriend until I’m twenty-two. You should rather try to reassure them, tell them stories about you two when you were younger, make them understand that he’s a good guy and that they’ve nothing to worry about, or maybe you could even make your parents and the guy meet each other so that they know what kind of boy he is.

      But we should also try to understand our parents, you may think that you’re big and responsible at 17, but they still see you as their child so they want to protect you. I admit that as a mom, I’d myself be freaked out if I knew that I did let my daughter go see an unknown person who’s living miles away.