BACKground history
about 3 years ago i meet a girl... at the time she was single, i started to grow feeling for her...but then she got a boyfriend the summer before high school started...and i gave up trying to be with her, so i just decide to be her friend...she was with her BF for all of freashman year.. i mingled around others girls, never really stuck to one, none were as amazing as she was.. we talked in freashman year, became good friends... sophmore year starts and shes still with him, im with a new girl, who i can say i love you too.. i really felt she was okay, not the greatest but a "will do for now" type thing, she even took my virginity.. she breaks up with her ex somewhere in the begining of the new year, 2009... i do the same(not cuz she's single now cuz the new girl wasn't working out)..were both single at this point...but recovering from break up's...we start talking, ALOT around febuary/ march...and in april, i realize that she is the one... i love her, im absolute about that fact, no one can tell me otherwise, i love her for who she is and a million reasons more. and for some strange reason, she starts falling in love with me at the same time, but doesnt want a BF right now.. we say we love each other, talk on the phone at night, we are kissing and touching and all what was missing was the title "boyfriend and girlfriend", she didnt want that for some reason...
NOW
Recently we have got to the point of our love were we made love...last wednesday... it was amazing... i thought she has to love me and we have to be together... but this saturday she tells me shes pregnant.. i know this child isnt mine, shes 2 months...she said she found out thursday(day after we had sex)... she going to keep the baby, she's not telling me who the father is (says its someone i dont know), she has only told me and her cousin... now i know i have to help her, and i am....... but.......(im crying right now, haha)... what am i suppose to do for ME? how am i suppose to feel... i know im being a little selfish.. but i have been waiting 3 years for her... and i dont know what am i suppose to do..all i know is that i still love her, and i dont want to lose her... but im slowly realizing that i am going to lose her, and im afraid... im scared, i dont want to be alone again...
i worte this for her.. she sent me lyrics of a song i like call "broken wings" by sage francis, i kinda sprung off it..
about 3 years ago i meet a girl... at the time she was single, i started to grow feeling for her...but then she got a boyfriend the summer before high school started...and i gave up trying to be with her, so i just decide to be her friend...she was with her BF for all of freashman year.. i mingled around others girls, never really stuck to one, none were as amazing as she was.. we talked in freashman year, became good friends... sophmore year starts and shes still with him, im with a new girl, who i can say i love you too.. i really felt she was okay, not the greatest but a "will do for now" type thing, she even took my virginity.. she breaks up with her ex somewhere in the begining of the new year, 2009... i do the same(not cuz she's single now cuz the new girl wasn't working out)..were both single at this point...but recovering from break up's...we start talking, ALOT around febuary/ march...and in april, i realize that she is the one... i love her, im absolute about that fact, no one can tell me otherwise, i love her for who she is and a million reasons more. and for some strange reason, she starts falling in love with me at the same time, but doesnt want a BF right now.. we say we love each other, talk on the phone at night, we are kissing and touching and all what was missing was the title "boyfriend and girlfriend", she didnt want that for some reason...
NOW
Recently we have got to the point of our love were we made love...last wednesday... it was amazing... i thought she has to love me and we have to be together... but this saturday she tells me shes pregnant.. i know this child isnt mine, shes 2 months...she said she found out thursday(day after we had sex)... she going to keep the baby, she's not telling me who the father is (says its someone i dont know), she has only told me and her cousin... now i know i have to help her, and i am....... but.......(im crying right now, haha)... what am i suppose to do for ME? how am i suppose to feel... i know im being a little selfish.. but i have been waiting 3 years for her... and i dont know what am i suppose to do..all i know is that i still love her, and i dont want to lose her... but im slowly realizing that i am going to lose her, and im afraid... im scared, i dont want to be alone again...
i worte this for her.. she sent me lyrics of a song i like call "broken wings" by sage francis, i kinda sprung off it..
Fly
“Me and you are different,
We don’t even need wings to fly”
Flying so high on each other
I’m in love with just her
Her ways are the days
The days you love and treasure
The days you could relive forever
Everyday with her I could relive
I relive and realized
That when I look in her real eyes
I will never tell a single real lie
Because her brown eyes are
Why some boys die
Die trying to get in between her thighs
And forever will they try
And people ask why
Why I need to be with her
Murmurs in the halls, sure
But your rumors will never remove your walls
The walls you hide in, alone
Alone
I hope you know that alone is a word that you can no longer describe your self as
As long as I’m here
As long as I’m near
I should never hear you say
Alone
Unless that’s what you wants us to be
You see
See, you wonder why sometimes
How I could be in love with you
But I say it would be a crime
Not to love you the way I do
Especially the days we flew
All over
Flying without wings
Dying indoors
Right now I am yours
I’m not quite sure if your mine
Because our minds aren’t in sync
See you want to slow down
While I want to speed up
But being with you now is enough
I hope
I hope that hope floats
And that my hope floats us to the top
We fly up to the top
Because girl you must understand this
Together indifferently
Mentally and physically
Me and you
You and I
Don’t.
Need.
Wings.
To.
Fly.