Prevent your self from feeling.

    • Re: Prevent your self from feeling.

      Well ... a few years back I fell in love with a girl ... I was in love with her for 5 years but never did anything special to show that to her as I thought she would never say "yes".

      ---------- Post added at 04:30 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:30 PM ----------

      Kind of the same thing happened the other two times I was in love in the past.

      ---------- Post added at 04:30 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:30 PM ----------

      But now I just think I am preventing myself from falling in love. I just imagine romantic stuff I could do with a girl (not a specific one) and I kind of miss the feeling a lot. Although whenever I like a girl the only thing I think of is what happened the other times and when I ask my self if I would like to fall in love with that girl I like the first answer I give to myself is "No, I'm going to get dissapointed again" but when I think of it again I realise that I would like to feel that again ... but I never do
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    • Re: Prevent your self from feeling.

      I think it's hard to stop yourself from falling in love. You can sometimes think it's the wrong time, or you might feel that you wish other things had been sorted out first, because finding someone, but you can't always choose when you meet someone, who's going to capture you're heart and make you feel special.

      Your situation seems to centre a lot around self confidence. You are nervous about rejection, maybe, or scared she won't feel the same way. But you can't worry. Because sometimes in life, you have to take a chance. And it might not work. But it might. And you thinking she won't like you, well, how do you know? You can't be scared to take a chance sometimes, because if you don't, then nothing will ever happen and I know for a fact you would regret it.

      I know it's not easy, and I myself find it hard to be brave sometimes and say how I feel, because I'm scared I have misread something and it's all in my head. But I hope you do take a chance, and see what happens. You really have nothing to lose
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      Saradactyl;2086538 wrote:


      Haha, Aaron. I wuv youuuu.
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    • Re: Prevent your self from feeling.

      You mentioned self-confidence. So how can I be self confident when the first time I just knew she wont say yes ... she was a girl that was just not interested in relationships, second and third time both girls just showed me they did not want to do anything. (One of them kept saying "Why do you leave me all alone?" when the others were going away and leaving us alone. We were good friends but I think she had noticed something and she kept saying that. How does that sound? Positive? I know I have to be more self confident but "How"?)

      Thanks
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    • Re: Prevent your self from feeling.

      sakishrist wrote:

      You mentioned self-confidence. So how can I be self confident when the first time I just knew she wont say yes ... she was a girl that was just not interested in relationships, second and third time both girls just showed me they did not want to do anything. (One of them kept saying "Why do you leave me all alone?" when the others were going away and leaving us alone. We were good friends but I think she had noticed something and she kept saying that. How does that sound? Positive? I know I have to be more self confident but "How"?)

      Thanks


      I know it's not easy, and there's no simple way to tell someone how to 'be' confident. All you can do is try and be more confident that you, as a person, is someone who another would like to get close to. And it's not easy, I know. Yes, it does sound positive if she didn't want you to leave her alone. It sounds like she wanted you to be around. And that's a huge compliment, when you think of it.

      Also, when you think about yourself compared to even the famous movie stars, what's the difference? Money, ok, well there's that. And possibly, notoriety. But other than that, we're all human. We all eat, sleep, break wind, use the toilet, laugh and cry. Nobody is different than anyone else. The only thing that makes someone 'stand out' from others is the fact that they have accept they are who they are, and they make the best of it. They don't let their doubts or self worry affect how they act around others. Because they have accepted, ok, some people won't like them, but others will. And they have everything to gain and nothing to lose
      [SIZE=2]Aaron - [/SIZE][SIZE=2]Support Leader[/SIZE] :kiss:
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      Saradactyl;2086538 wrote:


      Haha, Aaron. I wuv youuuu.
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    • Re: Prevent your self from feeling.

      It's easy to look back on how things were in past relationships. And of course sometimes you're going to miss that feeling, because you look at it through rose-colored glasses. You remember only the good times and you begin to miss those feelings. But then something happens and you remember something bad or the break up, which as you say, prevernts you from wanting to fall in love because you then remember the hurt.

      It was only a couple of weeks ago that one of my ex's phoned me and asked me to come get into bed. Porbably a bad idea to do it, but how could I refuse? It was great.. I felt like I wanted to stay with her again, but then sometime afterwards she started arguing with me over nothing like she would back in the day, and I instantly felt glad I'm single.

      My advise is to stop dwelling on the past. The thing all relationships have in common is you. You're the same person in every relationship, so it can be hard remove those parts of yourself that are still living in the past, but it maybe then you can start new relationships in the future.
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      The post was edited 1 time, last by Titus Pullo ().

    • Re: Prevent your self from feeling.

      No. It's something that can't be helped, so just let it happen. You fall in love for a reason.
      Tell the person you're falling for before it's too late. Love is definitely a risk worth taking. You could end up with a very great relationship, but you won't get there unless you take the first step by admitting your feelings.
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