Does anyone need any help with English?

    • Re: Does anyone need any help with English?

      Hallo my name is Mohamed i am from Egypt i am working as an English tour guide here in Egypt and my language is not bad but i would like to be the best .so if you don't mind i hope if you accept to talk with each other in English for learning more from you .

      Thank you for your time.

    • Re: Does anyone need any help with English?

      As a matter of fact, I do need help. Are you any good with rhetorical thinking and essays? I'm studying creative writing in college, and need to brush up on my critical/rhetorical thinking skills, as well as some of my grammar. As far as my grammer goes, I'm confused about comma usage, colons and semicolons, hyphens, and parantheses. Do you think you may be able to help me with some of that?
      Don't hang on. Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky. And all your money won't another minute buy. All we are is dust in the wind.

    • Re: Does anyone need any help with English?

      Well, my instructor asked me to write a process analysis essay about the mood changes that Jane, from the short story "The Yellow Wallpaper," goes through. I feel pretty sure I wrote it correctly, but I want to be sure I didn't just retell the story as opposed to actually examining the change in her attitude. I'll post the essay on here so you can read it if you really don't mind helping. Also, if you do decide to read it, if you notice any errors in my grammer, would you mind pointing them out to me? Though I really would appreciate the help, I don't want to seem rude in asking too much of you.

      Bound By Marriage

      My great grandmother has always been known as a tender, loving woman by all who know her. It was her greatest desire to serve others, and make sure one could find peace in her presence. Based off the love she gave others, one would think she had known nothing other than love in her lifetime. She lost her battle against cancer when she was seventy-eight years old. It wasn't until she was in her final days that the secrets of her past came out. What was already a well known fact was that she and her husband married at the young age of fifteen years old; however, it was not known that, after having conceived a child with her husband, he forced her to have an abortion. It was while she was lying in her deathbed when she finally revealed the haunting secrets of her past to my mother and aunt. When examining the absolute love my great grandmother displayed in her older age, one may wonder why she permitted this cruel and wicked act. The fact is that she was the product of a generation which denied women the right to have an opinion, thus she had no choice but to obey her husband's command. Likewise, Jane of Charlotte Perkins Gilman's "The Yellow Wallpaper" is another woman who fell victim to the generation of women without a voice. Although Jane has always accepted her inferiority in society, she learns to defend her individuality. Jane's attitude begins in a state of despair, then transforms into uneasiness, and ends in contentment.

      When Jane first begins journaling she assumes a hopeless disposition, and despairs of ever having the chance to express herself. Although John is "...very careful and loving (119)," he has denied Jane the things that she, like every woman, desires: equality and respect for self-expression. Though Jane secretly desires to be creative, she has allowed herself to be defeated by the inferiority John and her brother have placed on her, and this is demonstrated when Jane writes: " I sometimes fancy that in my condition if I had less opposition and more society and stimulus—but John says the very worst thing I can do is think about my condition, and I confess it always makes me feel bad. So I will let it alone and talk about the house (119)." This helps characterize both Jane's dilemma and Jane herself. Notably, Jane interrupts her own train of thought by recalling John's instructions. She has internalized John's authority to the point that she practically hears his voice in her head, telling her what to think. Even so, she cannot help but feel the way she does, and so the move she makes at the end—focusing on the house instead of her situation—marks the beginning of her slide into obsession and madness. This mental struggle, this desperate attempt not to think about her unhappiness, makes her project her feelings onto her surroundings, especially the wallpaper, which becomes a symbolic image of "her condition." She feels bad whenever she thinks about her "condition," that is, about both her depression and her condition in general within her oppressive marriage. Therefore, Jane demonstrates her own attitude of despair in allowing herself to be ruled by her husbands authoritive ideas.
      Jane develops a sense of uneasiness after recognizing her desire to break the mental grasp she has allowed John to have on her. Jane writes, "There are things in that paper which nobody knows but me, or ever will. Behind that outside pattern the dim shapes get clearer every day. It is always the same shape, only very numerous. And it is like a woman stooping down and creeping about behind that pattern. I don't like it a bit. I wonder—I begin to think—I wish John would take me away from here (124)." She is being drawn further and further into her fantasy, which contains a disturbing truth about her life. Irony is actively at work here: the "things" in the paper are both the ghostly women the narrator sees and the disturbing truth she is coming to understand about her own life. She is simultaneously jealous of the secret ("nobody knows but me") and frightened of what it seems to imply. Again the narrator tries to deny her growing insight ("the dim shapes get clearer every day"), but she is powerless to extricate herself. Small wonder that the woman she sees is always "stooping down and creeping about." Like the narrator herself, she is trapped within a suffocating domestic "pattern" from which no escape seems possible. So, Jane develops a sense of uneasiness with the realization of her desperate circumstance.
      Jane becomes content after seeing herself as the lady behind the yellow wallpaper. In the story's final scene, Jane writes: "I don't like to look out of the windows even—there are so many of those creeping women, and they creep so fast. I wonder if they all come out of that wall-paper as I did (129)."At this point she has finished tearing off enough of the wallpaper that the woman she saw inside is now free—and the two women have become one. This passage is the exact moment of full identification, when Jane finally makes the connection she has been avoiding. The woman behind the pattern was an image of herself—she has been the one "stooping and creeping." Further, she knows that there are many women just like her, so many that she is afraid to look at them. The question she asks is poignant and complex: did they all have to struggle the way I did? Were they trapped within homes that were really prisons? Did they all have to tear their lives up at the roots in order to be free? Though she never finds an answer for her question, Jane discovers that, having finally broke free from her domestic prison, she is now at peace within herself.
      From the beginning, we see that Jane is an imaginative, highly expressive woman. As she loses touch with the outer world, she comes to a greater understanding of the inner reality of her life. She falls deep into a depression upon realizing the absolute truth that, because she is a woman, and considered lower than the male population, she may never have anyone support or understand her desire to be creative. Despite John's stern commands that she avoid giving way to inspired ideas, Jane finds herself delving deeper into her creative mind, therefore abandoning the futile position she has allowed herself to be placed in. Jane fights the realization that the predicament of the woman in the wallpaper is a symbolic version of her own situation, and may even be frightened by her desire to disobey John. At first she disapproves of the woman's efforts to escape and intends to "tie her up." When Janefinally identifies herself with the woman trapped in the wallpaper, she is able to see that other women are forced to creep and hide behind the domestic "patterns" of their lives, and that she herself is the one in need of rescue. So, Jane's attitude begins in a state of despair, then transforms into uneasiness, and ends in contentment.

      Please feel free to be very critical on any mistakes I've made. I want this paper to be perfect.
      Don't hang on. Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky. And all your money won't another minute buy. All we are is dust in the wind.

      The post was edited 2 times, last by Dead. ().

    • Re: Does anyone need any help with English?

      Bound By Marriage


      My great grandmother lost her battle against cancer when she was seventy-eight years old. (I thought this sounded more interesting to open the essay, and it makes more sense chronologically.) She had always been known as a tender, loving woman by all who knew her. (Stay with past tense.) It was her greatest desire to serve others, and make sure one could find peace in her presence. Based off the love she gave others, one would think she had known nothing other than love in her lifetime. But, (added for internal transition) it wasn't until she was in her final days that the secrets of her past came out. What was already a well known fact was that she and her husband married at the young age of fifteen years old; however, it was not known that, after having conceived a child with her husband, he forced her to have an abortion. It was while she was lying in her deathbed when she finally revealed the haunting secrets of her past to my mother and aunt. When examining the absolute love my great grandmother displayed in her older age, one may wonder why she permitted this cruel and wicked act to occur. The fact is that she was the product of a generation which denied women the right to have an opinion; (semicolon because you're linking two independent clauses). thus, she had no choice but to obey her husband's command. Likewise, Jane of Charlotte Perkins Gilman's "The Yellow Wallpaper" is another woman who fell victim to the generation of women without a voice. Although Jane has always accepted her inferiority in society, she learns to defend her individuality. (So you're switching to present tense now? I feel like I'm in a time machine). Jane's attitude begins in a state of despair, then transforms into uneasiness, and ends in contentment. (Good, thesis is identifiable).

      When Jane first begins journaling, she assumes a hopeless disposition and despairs of ever having the chance to express herself. Although John is "...very careful and loving (119)," he has denied Jane the things that she, like every woman, desires: equality and respect for self-expression. Although Jane secretly desires to be creative, she has allowed herself to be defeated by the inferiority John and her brother have placed upon her, and this is demonstrated when Jane writes: " I sometimes fancy that in my condition if I had less opposition and more society and stimulus—but John says the very worst thing I can do is think about my condition, and I confess it always makes me feel bad. So I will let it alone and talk about the house (119)." This helps characterize both Jane's dilemma and Jane herself. Notably, (good transition word. I like it). Jane interrupts her own train of thought by recalling John's instructions. She has internalized John's authority to the point that she practically hears his voice in her head, telling her what to think. Even so, she cannot help but feel the way she does, and so the move she makes at the end (of the story?), which focuses on the house instead of her situation, marks the beginning of her slide into obsession and madness. This mental struggle and desperate attempt not to think about her unhappiness makes her project her feelings onto her surroundings, especially the wallpaper, which becomes a symbolic image of "her condition." She feels bad whenever she thinks about her "condition," that is, about both her depression and her condition in general within her oppressive marriage. Therefore, Jane demonstrates her own attitude of despair in allowing herself to be ruled by her husband's authoritive ideas.
      Jane develops a sense of uneasiness after recognizing her desire to break the mental grasp she has allowed John to have on her. Jane writes, "There are things in that paper which nobody knows but me, or ever will. Behind that outside pattern the dim shapes get clearer every day. It is always the same shape, only very numerous. And it is like a woman stooping down and creeping about behind that pattern. I don't like it a bit. I wonder—I begin to think—I wish John would take me away from here (124)." She is being drawn further and further into her fantasy, which contains a disturbing truth about her life. Irony is actively at work here: the "things" in the paper are both the ghostly women the narrator sees and the disturbing truth she is coming to understand about her own life. She is simultaneously jealous of the secret ("nobody knows but me") and frightened of what it seems to imply. Again, the narrator tries to deny her growing insight ("the dim shapes get clearer every day"), but she is powerless to extricate herself. Small wonder that the woman she sees is always "stooping down and creeping about." Like the narrator herself, she is trapped within a suffocating domestic "pattern" from which no escape seems possible. Subsequently, (How about that?) Jane develops a sense of uneasiness with the realization of her desperate circumstance.
      Jane becomes content after seeing herself as the lady behind the yellow wallpaper. In the story's final scene, Jane writes: "I don't like to look out of the windows even—there are so many of those creeping women, and they creep so fast. I wonder if they all come out of that wall-paper as I did (129)."At this point she has finished tearing off enough of the wallpaper that the woman she saw inside is now free, and the two women have become one. This passage is the exact moment of full identification when Jane finally makes the connection she has been avoiding. The woman behind the pattern was an image of herself—she has been the one "stooping and creeping." Further, she knows that there are many women just like her, so many that she is afraid to look at them. The question she asks is poignant and complex: did they all have to struggle the way I did? Were they trapped within homes that were really prisons? Did they all have to tear their lives up at the roots in order to be free? (Should this be cited?) Although she never finds an answer for her question, Jane discovers that, having finally broke free from her domestic prison, she is now at peace within herself.
      From the beginning, we see that Jane is an imaginative, highly expressive woman. As she loses touch with the outer world, she comes to a greater understanding of the inner reality of her life. She falls deep into a depression upon realizing the absolute truth that, because she is a woman, and considered lower than the male population, she may never have anyone support or understand her desire to be creative. Despite John's stern commands that she avoid giving way to inspired ideas, Jane finds herself delving deeper into her creative mind, therefore abandoning the futile position she has allowed herself to be placed in (Try not to end sentences with a preposition). Jane fights the realization that the predicament of the woman in the wallpaper is a symbolic version of her own situation, and may even be frightened by her desire to disobey John. At first she disapproves of the woman's efforts to escape and intends to "tie her up." When Janefinally identifies herself with the woman trapped in the wallpaper, she is able to see that other women are forced to creep and hide behind the domestic "patterns" of their lives, and that she herself is the one in need of rescue. So (Can you think of a better word here?), Jane's attitude begins in a state of despair, then transforms into uneasiness, and ends in contentment.

      For introductions, you generally go from a broad topic to a narrow one. However, you do the reverse for a conclusion. So you should be stating your thesis near the top (and remember to change the wording a bit. It's identical to the thesis in your intro.) Then you should transition into the broad topic, perhaps mentioning the story you told about your grandmother. Don't bring in any new ideas. You should just briefly restate what you've already said.
      In general, it's a good paper. You use transitions appropriately, but you could pick better transition words. You definitely do not retell the story but rather analyze with clear examples. Good work. Remember to stick with one tense, though. It's important. You have few grammar errors though, so don't fret about that. :)
      [LEFT]These are hard times for dreamers.[/LEFT]

    • Re: Does anyone need any help with English?

      DareToDream wrote:

      Although Jane has always accepted her inferiority in society, she learns to defend her individuality. (So you're switching to present tense now? I feel like I'm in a time machine).


      Thank you very much. I didn't even realize I changed tenses, but indeed I did. Thanks again for your help. :p

      Would the following be the correct tense: "Although Jane had always accepted her inferiority in society, she learned to defend her individuality"?
      Don't hang on. Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky. And all your money won't another minute buy. All we are is dust in the wind.