:/

    • It's funny how a support leader is coming for advice but, whatever.

      I just found somethings out, and it hurts.
      I can't post the stuff because it's none of anyone's business besides the people the person wants to know..
      It's a complete shock to me, and I feel like crying..

      But honestly, Knowing I can't help this person, nor am I making a difference for them, makes me feel like I complete failure.
      I feel like I'm useless to them, but don't get me wrong, I love this person, no matter what and I'm not going to just up and leave their life.

      I just don't know how to handle it.. I just feel so bad..
      Honestly, I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about it, and it feels like I just got hit with a ton of bricks..

      I just don't know how to stop feeling this way..
      I just want to brush it off my shoulders, and be there for them.. But it's hard when all you feel like is that you're going to fail them in the end and feel like complete and utter shit.
      =/

      Help?
      Real eyes, Realize, Real lies.
      [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    • Sometimes in life, we are faced with a decision. We either cut and run, or we wait and try and help. It's not always easy to know what to do for the best. But you, very much like me, are usually too stubborn to just run away, and prefer to try and help as much as we can.

      Yet..there are times when we can't really physically do much at all. And this is where other skills come into play. Listening, undertanding and directing.

      Listening - So you are there for the other person, and they know you will listen to them. Sure, you might not always understand and if you've never been through it, you may not relate either, but at least you give a conduit to the other person to 'vent' and to get things off their chest. It's amazing how much of a relief it is to just get things out, off your mind, and into the arena. So, even though you think you might be pretty useless, by listening and giving the other person a chance to orate their feelings and emotions, it's a blessing.

      Understanding - And by this I don't always mean understanding what it's like going through whatever it is, as unless you have before, you won't know - But I mean understanding what it's like to be low and feeling overwhelmed. I think we have all been there in the past, and it's nothing new. If you understand what that person is feeling, and you can compensate for that, then you are going to be there for them no matter what. You know if they're snippy or moody one day, it's not you, it's the situation.

      Directing - So, you might not have an answer. And you might not be able to solve the problem. but you can direct. In other words, you can possibly think of options for that person, or potential contacts in a professional capacity where they can go for help. Pointing someone in the right direction is sometimes just as important as giving them the answer yourself.

      Above all else, you just need to remain calm and patient with them. Nothing that's said or done will be meant against you, it's the problems that make people moody, not them. If you listen, understand and direct them where you can, that's the most you can do, and I know it will be appreciated.

      Anyone would feel lucky having a friend like you, so don't worry. Just be you, and I know that everything will work out in the end
      [SIZE=2]Aaron - [/SIZE][SIZE=2]Support Leader[/SIZE] :kiss:
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      Saradactyl;2086538 wrote:


      Haha, Aaron. I wuv youuuu.
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    • You sound like an amazing person because your heart is telling you to help but your mind seems to be thinking other things, which is VERY normal. I agree with everything said above. You cannot alway s fix a person even if you want to do that more then anything but you can always be with them along the way! Good luck.
    • Sometimes in life we have to deal with hard situations like this, It sounds like, by the look of your post, your friend is going to commit suicide or something. I hope she doesn't btw. If she doesn't want to talk, you might have to respect that but she's your friend, if you can tell that not talking to her wont be the right thing, then you should force yourself to talk to her, and force her to listen, as mean and brutle as it sounds, it COULD be what you should do. And I mean, ONLY IF YOU CAN TELL SHE NEEDS SOMEONE TO TALK TO. I know I'm not one to give advice, but I could atleast try... I guess.. as you won't give much information out (and I respect you for it so dw) I can't help as much as I could, but I take it you have already found out whats troubling her, if not, try to find it out, calculate everything that has been happening with/to her over the past weeks, or how ever long. Then try thinking of a solution, if the problem is unsolvable.. then.. well, actually.. I don't know (told you I wasn't one for this sort of advice)

      I hope I... kind of helped...? :)
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      [CENTER][LEFT][SIZE=4]I love. My girls. <333[/SIZE]
      [CENTER]<3 Anna <3
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