Someone please help me?....

    • Someone please help me?....

      Okay here it is.....

      I went out last night to a friends house party.... I was having a great time and I had quite a bit 2 drink..... my girlfriend was coming to meet me there at 11:30 so we could hang out for the remainder of the night then go home and sleep....

      My girl friend went to a 21st birthday party (shes 18 and im 17) and i went to my friends for drinks.... This the frist time i have trusted her to go out because she has showen me to acts of infidelity in the past.... 1. she was under the covers with another guy and i walked in (they where both full clothed though) and obv i beat the shit out of the guy.... and number 2. she wrapped her legs around a guy when he was hugging her.... in my opinion a girlfriend should not do these things... so i have never really trusted her....

      How ever she got there at 11:30 like she promissed (i was very pleased :)) but she was wasted..... really drunk.... and i feel when she gets drunk these acts of infidelity can happen... I trusted her for the first time and she showed up to me drunk...

      So i kicked off..... (night went downhill form there) i was angry and tryed to talk to her privatley on my own... but a lot of peoples where interfering... She got upset (because she was really drunk) and called 2 male 20 year olds to come pick her up..... So obv i was not about to let her get in a car with two people i dont know... so i kicked off..... and to cut a long story short she got upset i neally kicked the crap out sum 20year old guy... and then in the end we got a ride home to her place....

      we woke up this morning and disgusted out options..... basicly she wants to go out when she wants get drunk when she wants and do everything when she wants (totally her option and her right).... But i hate this because i am unsure if she would not cheat on me....

      i feel like im controling her and that is the last thing i want to do...

      So we have decided to take a break for 1 week (so we both can clear our heads) and then talk about it on sunday...

      and she is extremely pissed off with me because i got aggressive to 2 random guys (i dont even know) because they where takeing my girl friend away from me....

      was i not justified to kick off??????

      and basicly i want to ask your guys opinion should we split up??? or should we stay together???

      (also in febuary of 2011 i am leaving her to go back to my home country to join the royal air force) but she is also from england (my home country) and there is a posability we could end up together in the future...

      thanks for all advice

      David
    • Re: Someone please help me?....

      If you can't trust her, this relationship will most likely fail and it will be a struggle to maintain. You need trust, because without it, things like this are always going to happen. That's not how a relationship should be. And if she's giving you reasons not to trust her, then I suggest you reevaluate your relationship with her. You need to be able to trust each other and communicate with each other without having such a big blow up. If she wants to go out and do what she wants, that's her prerogative. She can do what she wants and if you can't trust her, you have to decide if it's worth working through or not. No one can tell you whether or not to break up with her. You can't control her, so you have to either deal with it and work on the trust, or let her go.

      I think you could have handled the situation better. You'll never get anywhere if you get angry with her and can't talk calmly. I think you should have waited to talk to her about it until you were alone and she was sobered up. The lack of trust is the main problem here and it's causing you to lose your cool. You have to ask yourself if you can ever trust her, and if it's worth it to stay in this relationship and work through it.

      Just my opinion. Hope this helped.
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