Part 1

This rope I tie around my neck/
Familiar faces that I forget/
Wondering if this warmth I hold/
Will slowly turn cold when I go home/
Embrace my self as I hold on for one last time/
When I look down on the ground from so up high/
The chair that holds my last breath/
Everything looks so dim/
This time I tried but fell so far behind/
The people I left will soon forget/
Just hold my hand on my way down/
One last night before I drown/
Wondering why I still hold on for/
Will they even remember my final speech/
I don't think you should be in here right now/
My body grows so cold/
As it reminds me that I am alone/
This overwhelming pain grows/
Its building up to much now/
The realty could not come so quick/
Why am I holding on still?/
I want to shut my eye lids/
Think deep inside my mind/
Someone remind me I am still alone in this home/
These body aches make me feel like an illusion/
Crawling in the desert, they left me deserted/
I try to reach out to you but you just let me go/
Why can't I get out of this hole/
Where is my way back home now/
Why can't they see me/
How can I forget all the things I've seen/
As I hold on to this precise moment/
Reminding me that I am still alone/
Grow so old this pain is unreal/
Grind my teeth before they kill/
Will they cut the rope and let me hope/
Maybe I can still find my way home/
I don't know what goes on anymore/
Just one pill to help me chill/
Why can't I see/
How far will I travel before/
I have to let go of what I held on for so long/
Where are they dragging me/
I can't forgive anything they did/
You shouldn't be here right now/
Just run away and stay inside/
Their hands holding me/
Still reminding I am still alone/
This internal pain is so real/
All this goes by so slow/
But it feels like time will not grow/
I let my self go/
This time I try to run back home/
Stopped in my own thoughts of being alone/
My whole life I locked everyone out/
But now how could they have got a hold of the key/
All my secrets they will leak/
Why do I still try to seek happiness/
Just listen to me when you hear the gun squeak

2 days pass, part 2

Awake from the grave/
Not even a simple note left on my resting place/
All this time I thought I would be missed/
A long shot away from being brave/
The kiss of death enter on my lips/
Never could forget all the times/
Why my white eyes still shine bright/
All the days I cry till sundown/
Why can't I seem to dry/
All the tears fall down my cheeks/
One came before the other/
Yet I still feel smothered in the covers of your lies/
I try to live my life, but I can't feel you/
The illusion always seem so real/
Enter a dark room by myself/
Can't find a light/
This darkness covers my eyes/
Why can't I still fall out of this hell/
Tell me if any of this is even real/
Where has my mind been/
This can't be what I got my self into/
Just one day I forgot to call/
I can see you but your still so far/
Climb for the top but all I do is fall/
While they laugh, I fall and fall/
I fail to reach the top/
This illusion sends me on a crazy trip/
Hold on just stay on track/
This body floating away/
Keeps reminding I am so alone/
This body makes me feel so gone/

(After nights of no sleep) Part 3

This needle slowly penetrates my skin/
Dreaming of all the things that could of been/
The everlasting thoughts in my head/
Never will they get erased/
The thoughts of being dead cross my mind/
I, close my eyes for one more time/
Why can they do all this to me/
How will I get through all this/
A mess covers my face/
Still dying before the final night/
All the illusions seem to real/
Hold my breath till faces turn blue/
Reminding me that I am still alone/
I can't help to feel unreal/
Walking on the air maybe I can fly out of here/
But will they even care when my live is taken/
This, time I can not find no one to heal/
So, why do I try to hold on for/
Why do I try to move forward/
White eyes that shine bright/
Dim as I start to die/
One by one inside my body shuts down/
Maybe you should just go away/
Forever before I drown the world with my tears/
Let them, come near me don't be scared/
I crawl to the next life/
This pain is never enough to make me feel so real/
Why am I even trying to embrace/
Knowing, I will never get out of this brace/
So, Why do I cover my face/
Why, do they all laugh at me/
I can't take it no more oh oh oh/
Why,/
Remember the light that use to shine/
Starting to slowly die/
All these illusions start to darken my brain/
Reminding me that I am always alone/
Stuck in the rain.../