I'm so sorry this is really long, but I would really appreciate it if you could read this and give me advice.
Okay, I guess I’ll start from the beginning. I’ve known my friend "Jane" since elementary school, and I’ve been best friends with her from about sixth grade to the beginning of last year. Even though we don’t have much in common and I haven’t had a class with her since fifth grade, we’ve stayed close just because we live near each other and have always been on the same bus. But when junior year started, a lot of stuff changed. I started sitting at her table during lunch, just because I didn’t really talk to the people I sat with freshman/soph year anymore and started to talk to some of her friends more. A few months after the school year began, "Jane" moved to a different part of town and we started to drift apart. I still sat with them and everything though since lunch was basically the only time I saw her since we didn’t have any classes together.
Around the same time, a bunch of other people started sitting at our table, and eventually this new group of friends formed. As I started hanging out with them more on weekends, I sort of saw everyone’s true colors and started to not like them as much. Most of them are pretty nice and everything, at least when you talk to them alone, but we literally have nothing in common – we have no classes or after school stuff together, have completely different interests. This has made it really difficult to become closer with them since I never see them besides lunch or outside of school when we’re in a big group, and when I do see them, we literally have nothing to talk about. Because of this, I’ve never really felt like I’ve been “in” their little group, and they often “forget” to invite me places unless I’m specifically there or ask what we’re doing this weekend or something. And I’m always one of the last people to know about everything, which gets so annoying sometimes since a lot of times I have no idea what they’re talking about and have to specifically ask someone. I’m pretty sure it’s because I don’t know everyone that well – I’m almost positive they don’t hate me since they don’t really make any backhanded comments about me, I literally don’t do ANYTHING to start drama, and I’m nice to everyone – but it’s kind of a neverending cycle, since it’s so hard to get to know them, and I wish they would at least start making an effort too.
I could probably deal with this if that was the only problem, but they’re ridiculously immature and catty most of the time too. They constantly gossip about EVERYONE and a couple of them are just mean in general, it’s literally like we’re back in middle school again. Like a lot of times, someone will whisper some normal thought in someone’s ear when everyone is around I guess to show that when she could just say it out loud and not make anyone uncomfortable. Also, when a lot of us are around and someone wants to talk shit about someone, they ALWAYS write something down on their phones and then show it to the person next to them. It annoys me sooo much – can’t they at least try to be nice and just wait until they’re both alone or something to say it? Not only that, but they’re even mean to who they call their “best friends.” Like a lot of times when they’re mad at someone after we all hang out and if they have to drive someone home, they’ll drop her off and then secretly do something else without telling her, which I’ve always thought was so mean. Also, whenever I hang out with them, they always spend the entire time bitching about how annoying someone was being and how they’re mad that they didn’t do this or they said something that upset them, and stuff like that. Now, I do my fair share of gossiping too, but that’s literally allll they talk about, and the stuff they complain about is so ridiculous. And basically every fight they have could be solved by communicating and talking things out, but they always make things worse and keep talking about it longgg after the conflict could have been resolved. And then, of course, there are a bunch of guys we hang out with a lot, and there’s always some sort of drama going on with them, but that would take another novel to explain.
So basically, I’ve dealt with this all year, but I kind of just had it this summer. I was away for awhile so I didn’t see a lot of them until like last week but when I hung out with "Jane" and this girl "Jill" (who I honestly hate the most out of all of them) I was completely done. Both times I was with them, which was for a good 5 hours each time, ALL WE DID was talk about how the boy Ashleigh likes randomly started to be mean to her, and suddenly decided he didn’t like her anymore. I understand how she feels since that’s happened to me before, but whenever Maranda and I would talk about something else, she would ALWAYS find some way to bring the subject back to her. I guess it’s not a huge deal when I think about it now, but when I got home that night, I knew something was wrong when I was more annoyed than happy after hanging out with them. I don’t mind any of them individually and I still have no problem with "Jane" and everything, but as a group I just get so annoyed with them and I just completely stopped making an effort to hang out with them/find out what was going on. And again, I could probably deal with this if at least we had something in common and I had something to talk to them about besides the latest gossip, but I just don't feel like we were meant to be friends, and there are plenty of other people out there that I could definitely enjoy hanging out with.
The only reason why I’ve really dealt with this is because I don’t really have any close friends outside of that group. Like I have other friends and everything, but I don’t really talk to them much outside of school. I honestly would stop hanging out with them if I could find a new group of friends that I actually liked, but I don’t know if it’s even possible since I’m going to be a senior and everyone’s group of friends has been established. Soo that brings me to my question: Is it worth it to stick it out for another year even though I’m so fucking sick of it or should I just stop talking to them (I doubt they would miss me that much) and start hanging out with completely new people, even though it would be a huge risk?
Again, sorry for the novel, but I really need advice since school is starting in like 4 days for me...
Okay, I guess I’ll start from the beginning. I’ve known my friend "Jane" since elementary school, and I’ve been best friends with her from about sixth grade to the beginning of last year. Even though we don’t have much in common and I haven’t had a class with her since fifth grade, we’ve stayed close just because we live near each other and have always been on the same bus. But when junior year started, a lot of stuff changed. I started sitting at her table during lunch, just because I didn’t really talk to the people I sat with freshman/soph year anymore and started to talk to some of her friends more. A few months after the school year began, "Jane" moved to a different part of town and we started to drift apart. I still sat with them and everything though since lunch was basically the only time I saw her since we didn’t have any classes together.
Around the same time, a bunch of other people started sitting at our table, and eventually this new group of friends formed. As I started hanging out with them more on weekends, I sort of saw everyone’s true colors and started to not like them as much. Most of them are pretty nice and everything, at least when you talk to them alone, but we literally have nothing in common – we have no classes or after school stuff together, have completely different interests. This has made it really difficult to become closer with them since I never see them besides lunch or outside of school when we’re in a big group, and when I do see them, we literally have nothing to talk about. Because of this, I’ve never really felt like I’ve been “in” their little group, and they often “forget” to invite me places unless I’m specifically there or ask what we’re doing this weekend or something. And I’m always one of the last people to know about everything, which gets so annoying sometimes since a lot of times I have no idea what they’re talking about and have to specifically ask someone. I’m pretty sure it’s because I don’t know everyone that well – I’m almost positive they don’t hate me since they don’t really make any backhanded comments about me, I literally don’t do ANYTHING to start drama, and I’m nice to everyone – but it’s kind of a neverending cycle, since it’s so hard to get to know them, and I wish they would at least start making an effort too.
I could probably deal with this if that was the only problem, but they’re ridiculously immature and catty most of the time too. They constantly gossip about EVERYONE and a couple of them are just mean in general, it’s literally like we’re back in middle school again. Like a lot of times, someone will whisper some normal thought in someone’s ear when everyone is around I guess to show that when she could just say it out loud and not make anyone uncomfortable. Also, when a lot of us are around and someone wants to talk shit about someone, they ALWAYS write something down on their phones and then show it to the person next to them. It annoys me sooo much – can’t they at least try to be nice and just wait until they’re both alone or something to say it? Not only that, but they’re even mean to who they call their “best friends.” Like a lot of times when they’re mad at someone after we all hang out and if they have to drive someone home, they’ll drop her off and then secretly do something else without telling her, which I’ve always thought was so mean. Also, whenever I hang out with them, they always spend the entire time bitching about how annoying someone was being and how they’re mad that they didn’t do this or they said something that upset them, and stuff like that. Now, I do my fair share of gossiping too, but that’s literally allll they talk about, and the stuff they complain about is so ridiculous. And basically every fight they have could be solved by communicating and talking things out, but they always make things worse and keep talking about it longgg after the conflict could have been resolved. And then, of course, there are a bunch of guys we hang out with a lot, and there’s always some sort of drama going on with them, but that would take another novel to explain.
So basically, I’ve dealt with this all year, but I kind of just had it this summer. I was away for awhile so I didn’t see a lot of them until like last week but when I hung out with "Jane" and this girl "Jill" (who I honestly hate the most out of all of them) I was completely done. Both times I was with them, which was for a good 5 hours each time, ALL WE DID was talk about how the boy Ashleigh likes randomly started to be mean to her, and suddenly decided he didn’t like her anymore. I understand how she feels since that’s happened to me before, but whenever Maranda and I would talk about something else, she would ALWAYS find some way to bring the subject back to her. I guess it’s not a huge deal when I think about it now, but when I got home that night, I knew something was wrong when I was more annoyed than happy after hanging out with them. I don’t mind any of them individually and I still have no problem with "Jane" and everything, but as a group I just get so annoyed with them and I just completely stopped making an effort to hang out with them/find out what was going on. And again, I could probably deal with this if at least we had something in common and I had something to talk to them about besides the latest gossip, but I just don't feel like we were meant to be friends, and there are plenty of other people out there that I could definitely enjoy hanging out with.
The only reason why I’ve really dealt with this is because I don’t really have any close friends outside of that group. Like I have other friends and everything, but I don’t really talk to them much outside of school. I honestly would stop hanging out with them if I could find a new group of friends that I actually liked, but I don’t know if it’s even possible since I’m going to be a senior and everyone’s group of friends has been established. Soo that brings me to my question: Is it worth it to stick it out for another year even though I’m so fucking sick of it or should I just stop talking to them (I doubt they would miss me that much) and start hanging out with completely new people, even though it would be a huge risk?
Again, sorry for the novel, but I really need advice since school is starting in like 4 days for me...
