im tellin ya u just gotta listen to what me and bear tell ya lol me and him seem to be thinkin the same thing in ur situation lol
So I grew a pair, and.. what happened?
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Hitman wrote:
im tellin ya u just gotta listen to what me and bear tell ya lol me and him seem to be thinkin the same thing in ur situation lol
haha word.
but we need to know a list of things she likes, so we can help you with where to take her. cuz coffee is laameeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.[CENTER]To the dumb question, 'Why me?' the cosmos barely bothers to return the reply, 'Why not?[/CENTER]
[CENTER]Hitchens[/CENTER] -
im tellin ya man do what we tell ya and she will be ur girl
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~+ Bear +~ wrote:
cuz coffee is laameeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
Coffee is super classy. A little bit typical but going for coffee can be cheap, interesting, and a lot of fun, if you're good at talking to each other.
That being said, if you guys haven't really hung out outside of school a situation like coffee could be intimidating because you have no choice but to talk the whole time, and if the conversation ever dies it can get awkward. Those guys are right, maybe somewhere fun she might really enjoy - she may be more willing to say yes, and it provides its own conversation if need be.
It sounds like she likes you, but she probably is genuinely busy. Maybe wait a couple days and ask her again. You don't need to set a specific time, either. Instead of asking "this week", just ask "anytime you're not busy?" - that doesn't allow her to make any excuses, she can either say no or set a time herself. -
Scaredycrow wrote:
Coffee is super classy. A little bit typical but going for coffee can be cheap, interesting, and a lot of fun, if you're good at talking to each other.
That being said, if you guys haven't really hung out outside of school a situation like coffee could be intimidating because you have no choice but to talk the whole time, and if the conversation ever dies it can get awkward. Those guys are right, maybe somewhere fun she might really enjoy - she may be more willing to say yes, and it provides its own conversation if need be.
It sounds like she likes you, but she probably is genuinely busy. Maybe wait a couple days and ask her again. You don't need to set a specific time, either. Instead of asking "this week", just ask "anytime you're not busy?" - that doesn't allow her to make any excuses, she can either say no or set a time herself.
Yep, I agree. I'm making sure I'm not clingy. Just clever with the way I speak and how I approach her.
I'm making it a no-brainer. And it's great. -
ok ima put it this way no girl around 16 is going to want to go for coffee ok so end the coffee thing u gotta take her somewhere where shes gonna have fun and i say i find something to do where u could help her do what ever yall are doing and u gotta know of something more physical that she enjoys doing something more outdoorsy something where u can hold her hand or have ur arm around her help me out here bear cant really work with art music and movies lol..........what are some more physical things she enjoys doing?
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Some girls will, but it's more of something you do with a girl you're already with before school or something like that IMO. I think sports are always good, because they can be physical and also she'll be happier.[CENTER][SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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just go through the day like its any other normal day
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np man thats what were here for and yo keep me updated u can pm me if ya need anymore help
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good advice on here so far.. basically, i will tell you to not try and impress her.. just keep acting the way you do. girls know when you are putting in an effort to try and impress them and most dont like it. if she likes you, then its for who you've been being. if you change it you are shooting yourself in both kneecaps.(as opposed to your foot)
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So today in first I talked to her about school stuff then slowly more into the personal things, (weekend plans, other chat stuff, whatever)
I just said, "Hey, it seems like coffee isn't your favorite thing to do, so why don't I go to your club's performance?"
Her, "Yea, that'd be awsome!"
Me, "Are you singing in the performance?"
Her, "No, but I get an awsome costume. You'll hear me sing one of these days."
Me, "Aww, you're going make me wait that long?"
Her, "Hahaha"
Me, "Well, you're very interesting, and I'd love to get to know you better."
Her, "Well if you listen to people, they all have a story to tell. Right?"
Me, "I do listen to most people, and you're different. You aren't most people."
At this point she seemed either shy or something along those lines, and we just waved goodbye and talked to other people in the class.
How'd I do?
---------- Post added at 03:42 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:40 PM ----------
Sharxbyte wrote:
good advice on here so far.. basically, i will tell you to not try and impress her.. just keep acting the way you do. girls know when you are putting in an effort to try and impress them and most dont like it. if she likes you, then its for who you've been being. if you change it you are shooting yourself in both kneecaps.(as opposed to your foot)
Yea, I've never been a part of that bandwagon. I just act like me, and most people enjoy my company as much as I enjoy theirs. Some people don't though, and that's just how it goes. -
Regardless of how it turns out, this is a success. You overcame your fear. The more you do this sort of action, the easier it will be the next time. As you probably know, teenage relationships rarely make it, I cannot think of any, but anyway, you will most likely meet your partner when you are in your 20s, when you are stable and steady. Now, what would happen if you were to be in your 20s, and still not be able to overcome your fear? You will have to learn the skill which could take years. Which is why this event of yours, is such a success. Learning the basics now, while mistakes are easily covered up, instead of making big mistakes later on. Just keep being the stud that you are now, and you'll have no problem catching a beaut later on. Take Care and Have Fun.
EDIT:
After reading your latest conversation, one thing I have to mention is confidence. You got enough confidence to ask her yesterday, but do not lose this confidence and become into a wimp again. Still have a backbone and do not give into her every need. aka love to get to know you better. But overall, very good. -
Good job man, sounds like a win to me.[CENTER][SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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Can you elaborate on what you mean when you said "she turned kind of shy"?[CENTER]To the dumb question, 'Why me?' the cosmos barely bothers to return the reply, 'Why not?[/CENTER]
[CENTER]Hitchens[/CENTER] -
Dakota999 wrote:
You may have read my post yesterday on the same topic.
I enjoy her company when we talk, and she's very pretty. She's all smiles when we talk, and we have a lot in common. I'm confident when I talk to her, and I approach her around her friends, because I just don't care about being judged.
So, with that said, this happened:
I ended up walking through the hall after school, and saw her. I initially was just going to say hi, and both smile at each other, but I grew a pair and took a risk.
Me: "Hey, are you busy this week?"
Her: "Sorry, hold on a second." (She was on the phone when we ran into each other.)
- "So, what's up?"
Me: "Are you busy this week? Do you wanna get a coffee with me?"
Her: "I'm kinda busy, I'm sorry."
Me: "Hey, no problem. It's all good. Maybe some other time...I'll see you tomorrow. Bye."
Her: "Bye."
I see her in class tomorrow morning, she sits behind me, and we talk everyday, wat do?
...Btw, how did I do? I'm also in 2 clubs that she's in and we both look at each other from across the room, you know those stare-offs that end up with a smile? When I, or her talk in discussion parts of the clubs, we often watch each other. Her and her friends don't mind when I sit with them at lunch, (I've only sat there a few times)
(Redundancy warning: Today, I also noticed that when I went over to talk to her, her friends kinda stepped to the side, and they we're watching/giggling. And she didn't seem to be super calm as I was. I'm trying not to jump to conclusions, but what does this mean..? If anything? *This was before I asked her to coffee later today.)
I may be just spinning in my head, I've never gone through this before. (By 'this' I mean acting on infatuation and just taking a risk that might toy with my emotions.)
I'm trying to be more adventurous, and take more risks, because this stage in my life won't last forever. I know the 'busy thing' is universally known as the hint, but she's explained her weekends to me, and how much homework she gets, and it does seem like she'd be busy all the time.
But then there's this: If she did have any interest maybe she'd forget about her work to hang out...right?
I dunno...is there another way to get a clearer, less vague hint? To at least balance the scale, so I can know?
At the same time, I've made sure she hasn't been put on a pedestal, she's just a girl who is just as prone to reality and life as I am. I'm just trying this part of my life for the first time, I need help interpreting, and getting the ability to further things that need to be pushed along.
i think shes not sure about her feelings or maybe she just got scared. ask her again, but in a more subtle way
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No, don't ask her again.
You've made it perfectly clear you want to chill with her - it's up to her now.[CENTER]To the dumb question, 'Why me?' the cosmos barely bothers to return the reply, 'Why not?[/CENTER]
[CENTER]Hitchens[/CENTER]
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